The CBB :: View topic - The Out-take Thread

#1: The Out-take Thread Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 6:32 pm

Jack stared very hard at the plants that were growing by the back door. One had a leaf that reminded him very much of his days in the navy, while the other had small purple leaves, that sparkled in the dew.

His eldest son came sprinting down the path, a broad grin on his face, and stopped himself short as his father stood there staring. Jack looked at him.

"Any ideas where these came from?"

"Mike?" was Stephen's offering, knowing full well that his brother wasn't due back from Montreux for a week, by which time it would have been forgotten. Jack shrugged, his keen eyes noting the hints that Stephen was giving, in spite of the apparent off-handedness.

"Is there a reason for the joy?" Jack leaned back against the railing beside the steps, and looked at Stephen, who was now blushing furiously.

"Ah, erm, Caterina Alessi agreed to go to the Ball with me." He stopped, grinned, half-punched the air, and then stopped. He'd wanted to see Mike or Felix, who had both bet him that he wouldn't find the nerve to ask the lovely Italian to the ball. He'd done it, in front of Cecilia no less, so they would be paying up on their next trip to Interlaken.

"The chemistry mistress?" Jack looked sideways at his son. "When was this?"

"Just now."

"Weren't they meant to be going out on a ramble this afternoon?" Stephen nodded enthusiastically. "Which means you asked her out in front of her class." Stephen looked less enthusiastic.

"Dad, I had to do something. They were..."

"Behaving as decorously as any Chalet Girl should?" Jack grinned, knowing full well the scope of 'decorously' especially when applied to his wife.

"It was..."

"Yes?"

"They were looking at me funny." Stephen was bright red. "The only one that wasn't was Cat. So I asked her to go to the Ball with me when we were walking together."

"They were looking at you funny?" Jack was enjoying this more than he let on. All of his elder sons and wards were attractive young men, mostly quite athletic in some way, and 'Maynard Fever' was a known disorder on the Platz in the summer months. It usually affected the elder girls and the younger staff, and he sought to discourage it as much as possible by ensuring that tea parties were kept up, and the girls were to see the boys as being friends and brothers, rather than objects to be stared at. So far they'd been oblivious - mostly they were too into their studies, their books or their sport to care much about the girls on the Platz, although now that Stephen was part qualified and could relax a little, he seemed to be noticing.

Stephen stood there, red-faced, so Jack continued, in the same amused vein.

"Are you coming swimming this afternoon - it's the Platz session." Stephen looked enthusiastic, then blushed furiously and shook his head. Jack grinned, and pretended to be interested somewhere else. After all, what were parents for, if not to tease their offspring occasionally.

"No, I think I'll leave it to you to keep the family reputation in tact." With this parting shot he bounded off again, to see friends elsewhere on the Platz, and leave his father to shake his head.

Last edited by Angel on Mon May 31, 2004 7:40 pm; edited 1 time in total

#2: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 6:36 pm

*giggle* Thanks, angel!

#3: Author: gigagal, Location: London

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 6:40 pm

Haha, enjoyed reading that! Laughing

#4: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 6:59 pm

Lovely! Can just picture the wicked grin on Jack's face!

#5: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:19 pm

Excellent, thank you Angel for the new bit!!!

Maynard Fever sounds like a very healthy disease............ Wink

#6: Some more out-take... Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:31 pm

Jack walked into the kitchen later that evening to find Stephen sat at the table while his mother fussed around with the plates.

"And we'll have to do something about your hair."

"Mu-um" his voice was exasperated - Joey hadn't stopped going on about it since he came back. Stephen was just glad that she hadn't noticed the ear-ring. "All the lads have hair this long back in England."

"I could cut it - wouldn't take ten minutes. You look so nice with short hair." Jack shook his head vigorously behind his wife's back. There was a good reason he employed a barber at the San.

"Joey-love, he's over twenty-one." Joey shot Jack a look, which he returned with interest, causing his wife to blush, although he was unsure if this was irritation.

"Doesn't stop me wanting the best for him. Especially if he's going to the ball with Caterina Alessi."

"Joey, she knows what he looks like...." Stephen grinned - he'd missed the banter between his parents, and didn't often get them to himself, although he often saw his father in term time.

"Yes, well, he'll need a suit." Jack and Stephen exchanged glances, and wisely both stepped out of the kitchen.

#7: Author: Cazx, Location: Swansea/Bristol

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 8:48 pm

*g*
Thanks Angel! Looking forward to more out takes!

#8: Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 9:42 pm

Not sure why it's an out-take, as it seems consistent with the rest, but likes it anyhow!

#9: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Mon May 31, 2004 10:17 pm

Kathy_S wrote:

Not sure why it's an out-take, as it seems consistent with the rest, but likes it anyhow!

It's an out-take because it meanders away from the plot, and as Conqueror has enough Plots/Subplots anyway, to inflict more on you at this point would be cruel.

The Cat/Stephen relationship (any resemblance between him and orlando bloom is coincidental - he's more like a blond Bill Weasley with Green Eyes) wasn't intended, he just needed someone to come to the ball with.

#10: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:18 am

Angel, as far as I'm concerned you can meander away from the plot as much as you like! It would mean we'd get extra from you! Laughing

#11: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 3:39 pm

I'm with Lesley. I like the outtakes Very Happy

.

Poor Stephen, getting teased by parental types is always embaressing. Then again at least he now has a date for the ball and didn't get turned down in front of all the girls...

#12: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:05 pm

For Ally. Who wanted more pre-Joey Jack.

-------------------

Then the Zeppelins came, drifting across the Channel, great blimps that sent a little boy and a little girl running into the house and out again, following with upturned faces the clouds of death.

A governess followed, chiding them for missing her lessons, suggesting that Master Jacky wouldn't go to Winchester if he didn't learn his lessons. Miss Mollie was the one who responded to this, demanding that she be allowed to go to school like Jack would, so she could learn 'proper sums' - a phrase that made her governess blanch, and Miss Mollie even more determined to go to 'real school, with real lessons and everything.' Jack backed her up, having learnt the hard way that disagreeing with his twin sister was the fastest way to find himself beaten up. She'd learnt how to do that long before their only week at the village school, and he thought it most unfair that they'd had to go back to doing lessons at home, though he had been promised prep school in the autumn if he worked hard.

They didn't notice they grey on their father's head as he returned from London each day, worn and tired from the War Office. Their mother, a gentle creature, fretted each day that they would not return, terrified of the stories that she heard. Her eldest brother had returned from South Africa with a bad leg wound the year that the twins had been born, and her second, third and fourth brothers were at the front now, at Ypres.

Nor did they notice the tones in which their parents spoke of Bobby, their eldest, who seemed determined to enlist when he reached an age when he would be taken seriously. The recruiters were in the village now, asking who would stand, whether their village would be the one to send the fewest, words which stirred the men and scared the women.

Their reedy tones enjoyed the life they had, somewhat unaffected by the world a channel away.

#13: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:12 pm

Wow. That's fanstastic, angel. I'd love it if there was lots more of this, although I suppose that this is really only a sideline from 'Conqueror'. But it would be very cool to see this turn into a long drabble as well Very Happy

#14: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:33 pm

Then one summer Bobby didn't return. He was to go into the army that winter, to join his uncles. Their mother cried that night, like so many had done before her. She had cried to the ten-year-old twins, crying for the brothers she had lost, wishing desperately for the war to end so she would see her elder son again.

She coughed again and again, swallowing tears and then coughing again. She had been helping with the 'boys' in the military hospital at Southampton, tending wounds, and holding their hands as they had slipped away. She talked of one boy who had been unable to count, and who had now no future on the farms. She talked of others who would get well, but their souls had been washed from their bodies by the horrors they had seen. She felt bitter for being so selfish, as others had lost their sons. She talked of the padres that heard their last confessions, and those who had died with no one to confess to but her. Each sunday they would go to Mass, and in the evenings they would talk.

It seemed so far away, but the hole where Bob should have been was bigger and bigger, swallowing their mother as she grew thinner. Jack was to go to Winchester that September, while Molly was to go to the Queens' School as well, if she passed the exam. Jack talked privately of wanting to be a doctor, so he could cure his mother. Others laughed at childish dreams, but Mollie would nod, and talk of wanting to teach the soldiers to read and write. They laughed at his Oxbridge Dreams - Catholics didn't go to Oxbridge - they went to London, or Durham or Bristol or Birmingham. They didn't laugh at Mollie's dreams, because they never heard them. She wanted to go to London, to Royal Holloway, or to Roehampton, or somewhere that would let her learn to teach. She simply plodded on, reading her brothers' books, able to best them both. Their mother wasn't there enough to disapprove - she was so tired now, but wanted to do something for the other women's sons, so that their might be someone for her own sons and brothers.

#15: Author: Cazx, Location: Swansea/Bristol

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:09 pm

Wow Angel, those last two pieces were so amazing! So much emotion and empathy was convayed!

#16: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:14 pm

Brilliant Angel. I know they're about Jack but I love Mollie here too. Her determination to get a proper education and her secret dreams of her future are great. As is her beating up Jack Laughing

The second part is very powerful, reading about how their mother watches the returning soldiers who can't recover properly knowing her eldest son is out there... That drew me in enough but then the way her talks with Jack and Mollie shaped what they wanted to do as adults was perfect.

I'm so glad you let us see these outtakes.

#17: Author: Rach, Location: Cheltenham, England

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:41 pm

Fantastic Angel! You make me care so much about what happens next. And I love Mollie's common sense and determination - just as I would have imagined her.

#18: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:52 pm

That's all incredibly strong, Angel.

#19: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 9:54 pm

*Feels very honoured*

What a wonderful insight into Maynard family life, Conqueror really has spun a delightful web for us to enjoy!!!

Keep at it please Very Happy

#20: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 10:23 am

Yay! More Conqueror!

I love the idea of out-takes - it's like buying the DVD of a great film for the deleted scenes.

#21: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 5:27 pm

The day that Mollie went to school, she cried, because Bobby wasn't coming home, not yet. She'd wanted him to see her off, because Jacky was going to Winchester with their father, but her mother was too ill to come with her. They were so proud of her for going to Queens', and she desperately wanted to do well, but what she really wanted was to stay home with their mother, and make her get better. Her Godmother had driven her to North London, through scared streets of whispering women, who pointed at their car as they went past.

It had been her Godmother too, that had taken her home at the end of term, when she played in the Orchard on the way from midnight mass, full of frumenty and joy because all the family were together again. They shared their presents and their stories - Bob wanted to stay in the Army, and their parents had agreed. The great-aunts sniffed, and told him how handsome he looked in his uniform, and their father seemed so distant now, no longer working so hard, with no war to work for. He still packed his briefcase and umbrella, but he left a little later, came home a little later, spoke a little less.

The snow fight was the first they had had in years - it snowed for one day only, and they made the most of it, the three of them. Mother joined in by making them hot cocoa and muffins. Father joined in by drying the clothes after, sharing looks with his eldest son; for neither did the smiles reach their eyes.

The term started too soon, and Father spoke of taking leave and taking his wife away to regain her strength, but she seemed to be refusing, and at first Mollie was pleased, but then she saw the Times, filled with this modern plague of influenza, and urged her mother to travel with every letter until at last they set sail in the January for warmer seas.

#22: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:20 pm

Oooh this is wonderful, thank you Angel

I really like Mollie and her desire to help her family, and its great to get some scenes of family life.

*loves prequels*

#23: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:49 pm

Mollie went with her brother to Winchester, noticing that he was pudgier than his classmates, although he seemed to fit in well. Her term would start the following day, and this time her parents would be there. She had barely spoken about her school - they knew of course that she was in a group two years older than her, because she had worked so hard - but she seldom spoke of her classmates, preferring to let Jack take the limelight.

Jack's quiet intensity was what carried him through the years that followed, ignoring occasional taunts for being the one that studied late into the night, taunts he would repay in the boxing ring or on the cricket pitch. Slowly he lost the puppy fat, although when he had major exams it tended to creep back.

The winter she was fourteen, Mollie came home. Her mother was more and more frail now, and needed more care. She was happier at the High - again they had put her into a class two years above her age, and she studied well, teaching herself the maths she enjoyed, and finding friends where she had struggled at Queens.

They lost their father first, rendered obsolete in his era one morning he had failed to wake. Bob had come home that weekend, and taken a furlough to see how he could help. Jack had walked beside him behind their father's coffin to the little Catholic Church that was on the edge of the estate. He had sworn that he would take care of their mother, and try to find a way to stop the sickness that was making her waste away.

At sixteen Mollie went with her mother to france, taking a cottage on the Breton coast, and closing the house they'd known all their lives. Bob had married, and would live there 'soon' and provide a home for Jack in the shorter holidays. Jack alone knew of her dreams to teach, and he alone knew of his anxieties for the health of his sister, scared of losing her to the white man's plague that was inching away their mother's life.

#24: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 6:59 pm

Thank you Angel, Perfect.

#25: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 8:10 pm

*echoes Lesley*

#26: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 9:32 pm

Wonderful. You're giving so much more depth to Mollie and Jack, giving them motivations that explain who they've become. I think it's going to be different reading about Jack treating anyone with influenza now imagining him thinking about his mother...

Thank you Angel.

#27: Author: Cazx, Location: Swansea/Bristol

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 5:51 pm

Thanks Angel! I love reading about Mollie when she was younger, she seems so strong!

#28: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 6:03 pm

At eighteen Jack still had the air of a boy, still slightly pudgy in the face. Mollie was lean, her face drawn in older than her years would allow. Their mother survived by miracles alone - prayers that went answered as the Maynards built their lives again, although Mollie refused to leave their mother to study, until finally she passed away, leaving sufficient for the twins to earn their degrees.

The years in London took their toll on Mollie, and she was ordered to spend time in the alps, lest she succumb to the consumption that had taken their mother. Jack was very much alone now, completing his studies at Oxford, and earning firsts on the field as well as in the supervision room. No longer the pudgy schoolboy, he channelled his griefs into the sportsfield, returning to home a halfblue without a thought to anything beyond his family. In his pocket he carried his grandmother's rosary, and in his pocket watch a portrait of his mother that had been taken in her youth, a fair woman with dancing eyes and a gleeful smile.

He had no time for the women his friends had. Jigger Maynard might be the soul of the party, but he had not the heart for it, and the nickname was well-earned. There were women among his friends, but not among his intimate acquaintance. His friends were honest young men, although scurrilous rumourmongers might insinuate what they willed, nothing stuck to tarnish his reputation as an admirable man, although the fact his sister could and would still best him in a fight might have done so.

He sought nothing but a place to practice the medicine that might have saved his mother, and was gratified to meet his twin's headmistress and find such a place. Refreshing his language skills, he met once again a woman with dancing eyes.

#29: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 6:55 pm

Lovely, thank you Angel

*Has a great desire to comfort Jack*

#30: Author: Donna, Location: Liverpool

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 8:52 pm

i love these out-takes Angel. Thank you.

#31: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:08 pm

Thank you, angel. That was fabulous.

#32: Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:21 pm

But Mrs Maynard didn't die until after Stephen was born?

#33: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:32 pm

Carolyn P wrote:

But Mrs Maynard didn't die until after Stephen was born?

I thought she was dead already - we don't see her mentioned in the books.

OOOOOOPS

Angel-ism strikes again.

*apologises most humbly*

#34: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:35 pm

Another excellent post Angel - beautifully written and clearly well thought-out. Thank you!

#35: Author: Cazx, Location: Swansea/Bristol

Posted: Sat Jun 05, 2004 8:05 am

Thanks Angel, that was all so beautiful!

#36: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Sat Jun 05, 2004 12:40 pm

Thank you Angel!

#37: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Sat Jun 05, 2004 8:30 pm

Quote:

Angel-ism strikes again.

Well it wouldn't be true CS without something like that *grin*

I love the way Joey's dancing eyes remind him of his mother, it's a lovely touch to the start of their relationship.

#38: Author: keren1,

Posted: Sat Jun 05, 2004 9:59 pm

the end was lovely here

#39: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 8:24 pm

A university drabble for Sarak_K, for her birthday.

Jack was tired and stressed. His supervisor had discovered he was a Catholic and had spent several hours over the last few supervisions making assumptions about Jack's beliefs and generally being thoroughly obnoxious. Jack had gritted his teeth and diverted the energy into the boxing ring at Balliol where he was on the college team. Stripped to the waist, the sweat poured off him as he pounded into the punchbag.

The captain wandered in, correcting his stance and offering to spar. Jack accepted, and after twenty minutes was in a fit state to chat. Wimsey had the team sheets in his bag, including the list for the fight against Oriel. To Jack's surprise he was listed as fighting against the supervisor who had so convincingly humiliated him. Eager for the fight, he arranged training times, and then they went for a bath and rub down, Jack enjoying the thought of letting off steam in the ring against someone who had found it in him to belittle a man for his faith.

The remaining supervisions for the term were with another graduate student, this time over at the House, and thus it wasn't until Jack saw his opponent step into the ring did he see his tormentor again.

The fight went Jack's way from the first. The older man was evidently unprepared for the pounding that he received from the medic. Within two rounds he was out cold, and Jack was being congratulated by his team-mates. It was only at the end of the evening that he realised that he hadn't seen his opponent again. It didn't particularly worry him, although now he was starting to wonder whether he had done the right thing, putting himself into the ring in anger like that. It had certainly been the best he had ever boxed, his figure lean and athletic after hours on the rugby pitch, cricket nets and boxing ring.

The following day he was due to go to the hospital for some time on the wards. As he got there, he heard the nurses gossipping about a patient that had been brought in the previous night, and slowly Jack's stomach turned to lead - his opponent hadn't regained consciousness yet. Making his excuses he slipped away, and reached for his forgotten rosary. Kneeling in the chapel he wondered again whether he'd done what was right - questioning what was right. News was filtering from Europe about the thugs that were patrolling the streets of Germany - Mollie's last letter had mentioned that their students were coming in with tales of isolated incidents which made him think himself no better than they.

He returned to the hubbub of the Radcliffe to seek out his opponent, and see if there was anything he could do. All the way there, his feet dragged. On the way there he met the Oriel captain, evidently on the same journey. To Jack's surprise, he bore no grudge, and if anything this made Jack feel worse, until Jack had to tell him about the anger.
Looking at this intense freshman, the older student was taken aback. "I know. He boasted about it, saying how he thought Moseley had the right idea. I'm not so sure myself, but it seems like he bore you a real grudge, wanted to kill you." Jack's eyes widened, realising for the first time the extent of the enmity some people seemed to bear against him for his creed. Pocketing his beads the two young men walked on in silence.

The opponent seemed to be on the verge of waking up - making small moaning noises, that might have been pain. His head was bandaged - "where he fell over" - and Jack looked at him with a mixture of contempt and pity.
The two students sat by the Graduate's bed as he woke up. Once assured that he would be all right, Jack returned to spending time at the pharmacy, vowing to return that evening when his duties were complete. In that stillness he returned to find the man sitting in silence, surprised by the company, but not entirely hostile. Jack prayed, hoping that the words would come, but they didn't, so he sat in silence, letting the other man speak if he wanted. After twenty minutes he seemed to be sleeping easier, and Jack left, hoping that he had brought some solace.

#40: Author: Cazx, Location: Swansea/Bristol

Posted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 8:36 pm

Thanks Angel! That's a side to Jack we've never seen before!

#41: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 9:35 pm

Thank you Angel Very Happy

It isn't an entirely nice side of Jack to see, when I realised he was taking his anger out in the fight I almost felt let down by him (knowing how we all tend to idolise him) and yet it was a very human and understandable thing to do. When he himself realised and went to see his opponent then I felt better again.

I like how you wove the history in between the immediate story, Mosely and the developments in Germnay tied in with the fight between Jack and his supervisor, it made it feel very real.

#42: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 8:04 am

Thanks Angel, another well-written insight into JAck's character, liked the way he questioned his motives get the impression that he'll find more constructive outlets for his anger in future.

BTW is Wimsey - Peter Wimsey i know he was a Balliol man but the timings not quite right?

#43: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 5:07 pm

Nell wrote:

I was taking some liberties with the time line Very Happy

.

Jack comes across in the books as being someone that has potential for deep levels of anger, and I wanted to explore it.

#44: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 9:38 pm

Thank you for that, Angel - I think you have hit on a very good characterisation of Jack - he does have the capacity for great anger but has mainly learnt to control it.

Two scenes - refusing to punish Mike at beginning of Joey and co, and reaction to Margotattempting blackmail in Theodora.

#45: Author: keren as guest,

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 7:54 am

maybe this is why he refuses to speak to his children when he is angry with them and keeps away from them.
simply because he cannot trust himself not to get carried away with his anger.

#46: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 10:38 am

angel wrote:

Nell wrote:

BTW is Wimsey - Peter Wimsey i know he was a Balliol man but the timings not quite right?

I was taking some liberties with the time line Very Happy

Fair enough! Very Happy

#47: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 8:48 pm

Another Jack piece.

He wasn't prepared for her - leaving England for kinder climes, he wasn't prepared to meet a coltish girl who would be the love of his life.

He wasn't prepared for the fight he would have because of her, a fight that made him more certain that he must guard his temper and his liberty.

He wasn't prepared for these few days of internment at that hands of men that would have tortured him given the lack of a British Passport and the shadow of the Consul.

He wasn't prepared to feel so humiliated for wanting to live in a land where he could be free to practice Judaism or Christianity, for not wanting to revere a man who was a murderer and a bully.

He wasn't prepared for days of not being able to see the sky.

#48: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 9:25 pm

Thought-provoking, frightening and disturbing.

Perfect Angel.

#49: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 10:05 pm

Brief, but beautiful.

#50: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2004 10:13 am

Very moving, thank you, you are bringing the whole of Jack to life

#51: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Thu Jun 10, 2004 5:11 pm

*gulps* A brilliant post, angel.

#52: Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 1:44 pm

Angel, I have just read all of these straight through - love the development of Jack's character.

#53: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 5:48 pm

Jack sat by the bedside, holding her hand as the breathing eased. Old and frail himself, he watched her chest rise and fall, each time more shallow and more laboured.
Her consciousness had left her so many hours ago, he'd lost count, and now alone at the midnight hour, he held her, aware of the papery skin, and the jagged bones that poked through.
The illness that she had fought so long to control finally claimed its victim, and as she slipped away Jack bowed his head and said goodbye to his wife.

Last edited by Angel on Tue Jun 15, 2004 9:12 pm; edited 1 time in total

#54: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 6:32 pm

Thank you Angel, that was incredible.

#55: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 7:22 pm

Very short, very brief, but very wonderful - thank you

#56: Author: Donna, Location: Liverpool

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 8:27 pm

*crying*

thank you Angel

#57: Author: Guest,

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 9:20 pm

Beautiful angel, painful and hard to read about him losing Joey to the illness he's been fighting but still beautiful and somehow calm.

#58: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 9:21 pm

... and that was me, forgot to sign in Embarassed

#59: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Jun 15, 2004 9:37 pm

It was Philippa that found him beside the wife he couldn't bear to leave. He had had a heart attack at the graveyard, and lay in the snow beside her icy bed, blue with the cold, and as peaceful as the stone monuments on the other graves.
She had been staying there for a few days, waiting for news of Margot's operation, and wondering if Cecilia would come to the funeral and bring Andrea. After all those years of estrangement, healed by the illnesses that had torn them apart, it would be good to see them together again. Pieter Witterson would have to be contacted, but for now she was content to stay beside an elderly man who had died in the snow.

#60: Author: Dawn, Location: Leeds, West Yorks

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 12:16 am

#61: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 8:56 am

*very close to tears* Crying or Very sad

#62: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 10:01 am

Angel, thank you! Both are lovely, touching and moving pieces.

#63: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 10:37 am

Beautiful

(but now you just have to fill in the gaps)

#64: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 1:01 pm

Angel! You write so well. It is all written so concisely and every word is so well chosen. You really bring the characters alive. Thank you

#65: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 2:55 pm

Together in death.

A suitable end.

Thank you Angel.

*Crying*

#66: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 6:40 pm

It's in the very pavement
Under which you tread
It's in the faces of the living
and the memories of the dead
It's all around and in you
If you miss it, you're a fool,
Wonder what I'm meaning?
It's the spirit of the school.

It's in the dark nights dreaming
Of a future framed with peace
It's in striving out for justice
And knowing not to cease
It's in the great compassion
of love and faith and hope
It's knowing that in our friends
we'll have the strength to cope.

#67: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 6:50 pm

It's dancing in the moonlight
and singing in the rain
It's taking knocks, and knocks, and knocks
And standing up again
It's talking, chatting, sharing,
In a language not your own
It's in great feats of daring
And in small things, done alone.

It's enjoying times of restfulness
As well as times of noise
It's an ordered sense of boisterousness
Well trained by gentle joys.
It's knowing what is wrong and right
and observing all the rules
And knowing when to break them
In the spirit of the school.

#68: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 7:04 pm

*proposes a round of applause for Angel*

#69: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 7:29 pm

*Seconds that and gets to her feet*

#70: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Wed Jun 16, 2004 8:36 pm

*joins the standing ovation*

That just fits the Chalet School perfectly. Reading it I can think of lots of bits of stories that fit each line.

#71: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 10:27 am

*rises to feet clapping and joins the ovation*

#72: Author: *Aletea*, Location: Manchester

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 12:22 pm

*doesn't know what to say*

#73: Author: caz, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 5:01 pm

*belatedly joins the standing ovation*

That was brilliant, angel!

#74: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 6:27 pm

Wonderful poem. Captures the essence of the School.

#75: Author: Donna, Location: Liverpool

Posted: Thu Jun 17, 2004 9:40 pm

*also joins the standing ovation* wonderful!

#76: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 11:10 pm

*blushes*

Thank you.

Not sure what to write next.

#77: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 7:51 pm

OK, following the post on Crax....

----

Jack hid behind the welsh dresser, watching as his wife of two weeks prowled around the kitchen shredding any piece of paper that touched her fingers, making herself a nest of paper feathers which she then tossed up in the air, and snapped at. She chewed at her inky fingers, before throwing a cloth across the floor towards the empty dog bowl. Picking absently at the spots on her face she stamped her foot before resting her red face up against the tiles on the fireplace which were nice and cool. He was at a loss to explain it - until this morning things had been good between them, they'd come back from their brief honeymoon to their new home, and spent hours talking and generally being newlyweds. And suddenly he'd woken up beside a monster, and he wondered if he'd been had.
Slowly she prowled the room, looking in the jars. Gradually the light dawned on him, and he remembered the flight from Austria. He backed away through the door, and slipped into the scullery, returning with a pocketful of packets. He carefully left them on the table and backed away before she noticed he was there again... He couldn't finish the thought without wincing.

She saw the chocolate and ripped the wrapping off, devouring it with a beatific smile on his face. He left the room and returned to the new Sanatorium plans.

The following morning he woke up, not entirely sure what he would find. To his surprise, she was awake and bouncing around the room, greeting him with a smile. "You know, I think I could climb the Tiernjoch." Jack winced, hoping she would get pregnant soon - he couldn't cope with this everymonth.

#78: Author: Dot, Location: Ireland

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:01 pm

Oh, that explains the 11 kids!!

Last edited by Dot on Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:03 pm; edited 1 time in total

#79: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Sun Jun 20, 2004 8:39 pm

lol!! What a wonderful description, Dot is so right!!

#80: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans/Leicester

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2004 5:33 pm

Poor Joey, and poor Jack for that matter (and I think Dot's right too)

#81: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Mon Jun 21, 2004 9:08 pm

PMT - Joey style! Laughing

#82: Author: keren,

Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2004 9:02 am

CLEVER........

I read on the internet once that you have yearnings for chocolate then..

#83: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Jun 24, 2004 10:45 pm

yup.

Although, it wasn't meant to explain the lots-of-kids things.

*grins*

eagle-eyed devotees of t/list, and o-t will have noticed an absolutely *massive* hint in the last installment of Crax. Very Happy

Please, keep spoilers to this thread Wink

Oh, and thanks for all the compliments - I wasn't too sure about posting it.

Very Happy

#84: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Fri Jun 25, 2004 5:39 pm

*clearly isn't eagle-eyed as she's had to reread the whole thing to find the reference!*

I wonder where he fits into it...

#85: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Sat Jun 26, 2004 12:07 pm

Ann wrote:

*clearly isn't eagle-eyed as she's had to reread the whole thing to find the reference!*

I wonder where he fits into it...

*grins*

-----------
(was an out-take, now posted to Crax)

#86: Author: Angel, Location: London, England

Posted: Sun Jul 11, 2004 7:35 pm

Cat had decided to get away from school for an hour or two, mostly to clear her head. She signed out in the rescue book, noting that she intended to be gone for two hours max, and would be walking beside the railway towards the rosleinalpe.

She was off-duty from now until first thing tomorrow, when she would be acting as junior escort mistress for the girls going south. She grabbed her handbag, and ignoring all the noises around her, she walked out across the Platz.

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