Limericks
The CBB -> Cookies & Drabbles
#1: Limericks Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:24 pm

See Question Time thread for original but this was joint effort between Jennie, Ally and me -

There once was a woman named Hilda
Who tried very hard to bewilder
An innocent child
Laughed, giggled and smiled
At the physique of Hilda the builder!

Please feel free to add you own either in their entirity or a line at a time for others to add to!

 

#2:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:35 pm

There was a young girl at the Chalet

 

#3:  Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:39 pm

Whose ambition in life was her ballet

 

#4:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:40 pm

She learned all the steps......

 

#5:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:58 pm

And then one night she crept
Down the stairs and ran off to the Ballet.

 

#6:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 4:59 pm

There was a young doctor called Jack...

 

#7:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 5:03 pm

Who very much wished to go back

 

#8:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 5:04 pm

to living in rome
where he felt much at home

 

#9:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 5:13 pm

And helped paint the taxi-cabs black.

------------------------------

There was a Head Girl of the school
Whose Prefects had helped her to rule
In a manner so firm
That even a worm
Would respect her as Head of the school.

 

#10:  Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 5:31 pm

There was a headmistress called Bill

 

#11:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 6:06 pm

Who discovered that she had the skill
(Never dreamt of before)
Of laying down the law
In a speech which was sarcasm-filled.

--------------------------

There was a young schoolgirl called Jo...

 

#12:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Fri May 28, 2004 6:33 pm

who found she could tie up a bow....

 

#13:  Author: Rachel, Location: Plotting in my lair PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 1:27 am

she knotted the ends
around all her friends
and smothered their faces in dough

 

#14:  Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 12:38 pm

There was a fifth former called Gay
Who thought to enliven the day

 

#15:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 1:06 pm

She played on her cello
Until they were mellow
And said, 'That's showed them the way'

 

#16:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 1:58 pm

you'e allowed to make up words right?!

There was a girl called Richenda
Who her father she did offenda

 

#17:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 3:27 pm

She went off to school

 

#18:  Author: Abi, Location: Alton, Hants PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 3:37 pm

And behaved like a fool,

 

#19:  Author: Rachel, Location: Plotting in my lair PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 4:06 pm

and finally went on a bender!



(If Corney's were anything like these you can easily see why they weren't included in the Chaletian!)

 

#20:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 4:07 pm

There was a young woman called Jo

 

#21:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 4:12 pm

Who one day started to glow

 

#22:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 4:15 pm

She climbed up an alp

 

#23:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 4:49 pm

And damaged her scalp.
And said 'What an odd way to grow.'

 

#24:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 5:14 pm

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL

*pulls self together*

There was a young doctor called Jem...

 

#25:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 5:31 pm

Who had lots and lots of phlegm.

 

#26:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 5:35 pm

some patients died
And and they started to be fried
Cos Jem the doctor had kille them!

He was frying them for a medical experiment!

The was a girl called Mary-Lou

 

#27:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 5:40 pm

Who always thought that she knew
Just what was required
And she never tired

 

#28:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 6:20 pm

of "helping" the others pull through.

_____________________________

A selfish young woman named Betty
Sought revenge for an incident petty

 

#29:  Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 6:23 pm

Had designs on a map
Got the School in a flap
And was last heard of in the Serengeti

(poetic licence!)


There was a young lady called Len,
Who was her mother all over again,

 

#30:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 6:54 pm

Nosey as a bloodhound
And Thick-headed all round

 

#31:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2004 8:36 pm

But she didn't have the way with the pen.



The was a girl called Jo(ey)

 

#32:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 5:51 pm

Who by the Robin was called Zoe

 

#33:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 6:00 pm

When Jo nearly drowned
'Twas the very sweet sound
Of Rob's song which restored to us Joey.

------------------

There was a young lady called Bride...

 

#34:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:03 pm

Who by all the rules did abide.
So she became headgirl
And was a CS pearl
As well as a marvellous guide.

There was a young girl called Thekla

 

#35:  Author: Angel, Location: London, England PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:15 pm

Whose snobbery was quite reckless
She insulted the trades
The staff, girls and maids
Until they said 'she's too feckless'

----------

There was once a young misery

 

#36:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:17 pm

Who went by the name of Annersley Razz

 

#37:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:22 pm

She taught at the Chalet school

 

#38:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Mon May 31, 2004 7:24 pm

And each night, as a rule,
Took classes in heavy artillery.

------------------

There was a young mistress called Kathie...

 

#39:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 4:16 pm

Who had a lisp and said 'Wath he?'

 

#40:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 5:43 pm

But this did not detract
From the unlikely fact

 

#41:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 5:46 pm

That she was really a Banshee

-------------------


There was a young lass called Len

 

#42:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 5:53 pm

who once lost her new fountain pen

 

#43:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:20 pm

She looked and she looked

 

#44:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 11:17 am

and found it was cooked
in a pie with the little red hen

------------------------

There was a music lover called Denny

 

#45:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 11:36 am

who had oddities counted as many

 

#46:  Author: Lynsey, Location: Fife PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 7:59 pm

He talked about Plato

 

#47:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Wed Jun 02, 2004 8:15 pm

All the time, so

 

#48:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2004 4:26 pm

And the girls said 'Will he or won't he or when he?'







There was a young teacher called Nancy
For mountains she had quite a fancy

 

#49:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2004 4:40 pm

So when she had the chance
She skipped off to France

 

#50:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2004 4:41 pm

she would race to the top
get a drink out and flop
on the grass, to read her Tom Clancy

 

#51: Limericks about the Dark Ages... Author: Katiididit, Location: Gloucestershire PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2004 5:06 pm

A petite mademoiselle named Simone
Was so very sick for her home
In utter despair
She chopped off her hair
and ran off to the woods all alone (!)

On finding Simone's hefty plait
and remembering to put on her hat
Jo found poor Simone
now no longer alone
she cheered up - and that was that....

heavens - that's awful!

Sarah

(goes to hide) Embarassed

 

#52:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Thu Jun 03, 2004 5:10 pm

Laughing Thanks, Sarah, I needed that laugh!

 

#53:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 7:49 pm

There once was young girl called Robin

 

#54:  Author: Angel, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 8:12 pm

A dab hand with wool and a bodkin

 

#55:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:20 pm

she would crochet fine lace
at an astonishing pace

 

#56:  Author: Angel, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2004 9:23 pm

Until she ran out on the bobbin

 

#57:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 3:10 am

Jack Lambert, when bored, went astray,
Checked the Honours Board for Auntie Gay,

 

#58:  Author: BethC, Location: Worcester, UK PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 4:59 am

On finding her there
She said "I declare,

 

#59:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 8:28 am

That being good must occasionally pay."

 

#60:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Mon Jun 07, 2004 7:45 pm

There was a young girl called Margot
Who would sing Handel's Largo

 

#61:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 8:56 am

while hemming a sheet

 

#62:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 9:00 am

with stitches so neat

 

#63:  Author: Rachel, Location: Plotting in my lair PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 9:41 am

until Matey put in an embargo.

___________________________________________



Madge sighed and heaved at her bosom,

 

#64:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 3:28 pm

I must get on and lose some

 

#65:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 4:53 pm

of this surplus wieght
it must be all the cake i ate

 

#66:  Author: Mora, Location: Lancaster PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 7:07 pm

And patissieres by the dozen

-------------------

There was a great trouble in school

 

#67:  Author: BethC, Location: Worcester, UK PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 7:26 pm

When Plato fell into the pool

 

#68:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Tue Jun 08, 2004 7:55 pm

He coughed and he sneezed
He bellowed and wheezed

 

#69:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:26 am

and then fell over a stool

------------

A young mistress called Peggy

 

#70:  Author: caz, Location: Cambridge PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:33 am

preferred bread that was fried but not eggy.
And then one sad day
She found she had to pay
By being no longer sylph-like and leggy.

---------------------------

There was a new doc at the San

 

#71:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:37 am

Who had a remarkable tan

 

#72:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 4:19 pm

He fried in the sun
'Til he looked like a bun,
Or like a baked bean in a can.

Last edited by Jennie on Wed Jun 09, 2004 4:43 pm; edited 1 time in total

 

#73:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 4:29 pm

plato composed a tune

 

#74:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Wed Jun 09, 2004 4:43 pm

All about the month of June

 

#75:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2004 4:31 am

At its gala debut
Joey sang clear and true
Until somebody popped a balloon.

(Assuming the first two lines are Jackie’s & Jennie’s – got a bit confused by the June line in Jennie’s sig file at first Rolling Eyes )
______________
“You’re now Ted, and we’ll let no one know,
You’ve been bounced from three schools in a row.”

 

#76:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Thu Jun 10, 2004 6:15 pm

Kathy_S wrote:
(Assuming the first two lines are Jackie’s & Jennie’s – got a bit confused by the June line in Jennie’s sig file at first Rolling Eyes )
.”


I did too, but hey it turned out well.




if you cannot behave
or be honest and brave

 

#77:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2004 12:17 pm

then we'll bounce you from this one tooo

(with poetic licence on the rhyme)

-------------------------

The sale began with a swing

 

#78:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2004 12:30 pm

Though the girls had nothing to bring
They found and old shoe
Made out of some glue

 

#79:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2004 12:50 pm

And cobbled it up with some string.



There was prefect called Maeve
Who decided to go to a rave

 

#80:  Author: gigagal, Location: London PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2004 7:51 pm

She got high on grass
'Til out she did pass

 

#81:  Author: Vikki, Location: Possibly in hell! It's certainly hot enough....... PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2004 11:44 pm

And her virtue nobody could save.......

 

#82:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Sat Jun 12, 2004 4:16 am

Gaudenz, the man-of-all-work,
Was never permitted to shirk.

 

#83:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat Jun 12, 2004 11:53 am

He slaved and he toiled
He moithered and moiled

 

#84:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat Jun 12, 2004 10:24 pm

And said that he felt like a burk.




There was a young man called Reg


ETA: why do I think the subtitle to this ought to be 'Like Corney might have wrote'?

 

#85:  Author: Rachel, Location: Plotting in my lair PostPosted: Sat Jun 12, 2004 10:28 pm

Jennie wrote:
ETA: why do I think the subtitle to this ought to be 'Like Corney might have wrote'?



Ummmmmmmm, because it is? Wink

 

#86:  Author: jackie green, Location: Rotherham PostPosted: Sat Jun 12, 2004 10:53 pm

who couldn't eat ANY green veg

 

#87:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2004 6:22 am

"If you get beri-beri,
We never shall marry,"
His sweetheart was heard to allege

___________

Miss Diana Skelton took pride
In wreaking revenge upon Bride.

 

#88:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 11:11 am

She tossed and she hurled,
The curtains she swirled,

 

#89:  Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 11:30 am

Until she just wanted to hide

-------

There was a young Lucy called Vi
Who aimed as straight as a die

 

#90:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 11:41 am

when a netball she shot
each one she a goal she got

 

#91:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Fri Jun 18, 2004 12:35 pm

And said, 'My results do not lie.'

 

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