A difficult time for the Chalet school
The CBB -> Cookies & Drabbles
#1: A difficult time for the Chalet school Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 1:56 pm

I wrote this last night and am not too sure about it....

The wreckage of the train was sifted through, the rescue party searching for survivors, they had already recovered the limp form of a teenage girl and her father, both were quickly dispatched to the nearest aid-station. The team were becoming disheartened, surely, there could be no more people hidden amongst the rubble of train and building they precariously lifted metal runners and frames and continued the search for survivors.
It was to be called the worst rail disaster in centuries, though none of them knew it yet, the small mountain train had slipped it’s rails and had rolled down the mountain side finally crashing into and destroyed the church at the foot of the hill. Rescuers were at once sent for to help recover any survivors, no one had much hope, the train carriage had plummeted down the hillside for a great distance and, when it hit the church, the building was demolished.
The Searchers came across another body in the rubble it was a middle aged woman, sensible looking, and amidst the confusion, totally calm, in fact, she looked totally unharmed and a smile played across her lips. She was removed and taken to the newly established aid tent. And the search continued. In the tent helpers were attending to the wounds of the survivors. No one payed heed to the quiet body, if they were quiet they weren’t in pain. Suddenly a doctor burst into the tent, he glanced around, he caught sight of the woman lying unattended in the corner, he rushed over and seized her wrist. Joey Maynard, the mother of eleven had died alone, without her Jack.
*
“Is there a Doctor anywhere?” The cry came desperate, from the woman dressing wounds feverishly.” Jack rose automatically the room became a blur, but he managed to approach a body that needed medical attention.
“Don’t Chuck, You’re no use to anyone in that state.” The lady kindly said, “go and regain yourself, we need the help to stay brave.”
Jack swayed and returned to Joey’s body, he began to examine her; surely he had made a mistake in his diagnosis, grief suddenly enveloped him and he sank to the floor, next to his wife.
*
He didn’t know how long he lay there. A woman was standing over him clutching a steaming mug of kaffe.
“Joey?”
“No dear. Drink this you need it. You’re worn out.”
“No, Joey needs me.”
“She’s gone. You can’t help her, she’s dead.”
The truthfulness of this statement came over Jack; the woman attending to him embraced him and felt him shaking.
“Who was it?”
“My wife, Joey Maynard,”
The woman dropped her arms, “The Joey Maynard? The author?” Jack nodded mutely.

That's all I've got for now, anyone feel free to continue...

 

#2:  Author: Marianne, Location: Bournemouth PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 2:10 pm

Crying or Very sad
gosh Charlotte, are you sure you want people to continue?
It looks like you've given it a lot of thought!

 

#3:  Author: Lulie, Location: Middlesbrough PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 2:40 pm

What a beginning! Poor Jack - and is the mystery woman somebody we know? Is there anyboys else CS related who is dead? Who? What? Where? Why? How?

Charlotte, come back and write some more!!!

*tries to disentanlge self from hook*

 

#4:  Author: Laura, Location: London (ish) PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 2:46 pm

Its very good but agh! You killed her!

I think we'd all like some more anyway...

 

#5:  Author: Lisa, Location: South Coast of England PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 2:48 pm

Quote:
Joey Maynard, the mother of eleven had died alone, without her Jack.


Ohh! Crying or Very sad I found that line really moving - Joey had always been surrounded by people, amd she dies alone ... sniff... and without HER Jack ... wail!...

*reaches for hankies and chocs to await the next section*

 

#6:  Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 4:40 pm

I think that's the first time that she's been killed off so early in a drabble.

 

#7:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 4:48 pm

Jennie wrote:
I think that's the first time that she's been killed off so early in a drabble.


Does that mean i get into the record book? Very Happy

 

#8:  Author: Lulie, Location: Middlesbrough PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 4:51 pm

Charlotte wrote:
Jennie wrote:
I think that's the first time that she's been killed off so early in a drabble.


Does that mean i get into the record book? Very Happy


Only if you write more (hint hint!) Laughing

 

#9:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 4:58 pm

Like i said, there is no more, anyone can add what they like but I'm done for now!

 

#10:  Author: Laura, Location: London (ish) PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 5:03 pm

You CAN'T get out of it that easily! (ok, well you can, but we'd all much rather you didn't.)

Consider me throwing small sparkly purple leaves at your small sparkling purple leaf.

 

#11:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 10:54 pm

Fine! I shall have a go although i'm not promising anything!

 

#12:  Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans PostPosted: Tue Jul 27, 2004 11:50 pm

Yay Charlotte Very Happy I'm looking forward to whatever comes next.

 

#13:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 12:20 am

if it does Like i said, I'm not promising anything

 

#14:  Author: Nicole, Location: New Zealand PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 6:33 am

Oh, Charlotte, you can't leave it there after that fantastic start!! There are so many places you can take this drabble.

More please - lots more!!!

 

#15:  Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 6:54 am

Charlotte - just a minor point on the medical side - will always go to the quiet one first - they are the ones that are so seriously ill that they cannot tell you so -If someone is yelling you know they are alive!


That apart though - this is an intriguing start and I really hope that you add to it soon Laughing

 

#16:  Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 2:31 pm

Nice beginning Charlotte. More soon please.

 

#17:  Author: Marianne, Location: Bournemouth PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 7:07 pm

ahhh, come on Charlotte



























*please Very Happy *

 

#18:  Author: Kelly, Location: Auckland, New Zealand PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 9:16 pm

More please.
You can't leave it there! Very Happy
*hopeful smile*

 

#19:  Author: Helen P, Location: Cheshire PostPosted: Wed Jul 28, 2004 10:22 pm

This is the first time so far that a drabble has brought tears to my eyes Crying or Very sad

Please carry on if you feel able, Charlotte - as others have said, there is so much potential here!

 

#20:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Sun Aug 01, 2004 5:24 pm

Lesley wrote:
just a minor point on the medical side - will always go to the quiet one first - they are the ones that are so seriously ill that they cannot tell you so -If someone is yelling you know they are alive!


these wern't trained first aiders ( Very Happy not like me, I've just passed my first aid badge!! Very Happy )

 

#21:  Author: Charlotte, Location: Casterton, Kirkby Lonsdale PostPosted: Thu Aug 05, 2004 8:29 pm

i don't think i can continue with this. lack of time/skill. So anyone who would like to please feel free, or also feel free to ignore it. sorry to anyone who was expecting more from me Wink

 

The CBB -> Cookies & Drabbles


output generated using printer-friendly topic mod, All times are GMT + 1 Hour

Page 1 of 1

Powered by phpBB 2.0.6 © 2001,2002 phpBB Group