The CBB :: View topic - The Abbess at St Trinians

#1: The Abbess at St Trinians Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2004 9:33 pm

"What's the next school?" Hilda Annersley, erstwhile Headmistress of the renowned Chalet School in Switzerland, asked of the Co-ordinator of this educational tour.
That lady frowned and glanced at a list. "A girl's boarding school," she began rather hesitantly. "It's called St. Trinian's.."
"I'm not sure I've ever heard of that particular saint before," Hilda returned dubiously. "But never mind. I always enjoy inspecting girls' boarding schools! It makes me feel quite at home."
The Co-ordinator's mouth twisted in what might have been a smile. "I'm not certain that you'll enjoy this school, Hilda! Did I hear that your girls refer to you as 'the Abbess'?"
"They do," Hilda agreed, puzzled. What had this to do with anything?
"In that case, my dear, I'd invest in a good set of earplugs and eyemask. It's the only way you'll survive this particular establishment....."

#2: Author: Ray, Location: Bristol, England

Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2004 9:39 pm

Miss Fritton read the notice, then read it again, then turned the page upside down and read it for a third time, just in case it made any difference to the content. It didn't. Backwards, forwards or whichever way round you chose to read it, the content remained the same:

St Trinnians was going to be inspected!

#3: Author: Lesley, Location: Rochester, Kent

Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2004 10:44 pm

She gathered together some of her Prefects.

"Now girls," she began, her legubrious face more mournful than normal, "I expect you to help me keep the Fourth Formers under control for the duration of the Inspection. I want all the stills to be hidden, the dynamite making factory moved to the nearby woods, and, if you could find any signs of the previous Inspection team,I'd be very grateful."

The Head Girl, Marcia Donaldson, finished her cigarette, took another swig of gin then remarked, "The last inspection team ended up as part of the Sultan of Brunei's harem, Miss Fritton."

Miss Fritton swallowed, "Yes, I know, I know, I heard that the Sultan is very pleased with them all, especially Mr Carter. I know he'd be happy with another team, but we have to be careful.Will you help me girls?"

"What's in it for us?"

#4: Author: Ray, Location: Bristol, England

Posted: Tue Aug 24, 2004 10:47 pm

"Oh, the usual rewards - although there is a bonus in it for you all if you manage to keep the inspection team from actually being eaten."

#5: Author: charlotte forgot to login,

Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2004 12:02 pm

"but miss," they whined in unison

#6: Author: Ciorstaidh, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 25, 2004 1:43 pm

"Now, now girls, I know I'm restricting your fun, but do you want folks to become suspicious? It could end in ... closure." She whispered this last, and took a swig out of Marcia's gin bottle.

The prefects looked at one another. Ginny Trent smirked, and the others knew that she had a plan.

"Don't you worry about a thing, Miss Fritton. We will do our best to stop that from happening. Here's what we'll do..."

#7: Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Thu Aug 26, 2004 6:47 pm

Uh oh.... OK people you'll have to carry on- I haven'
t watched the St Trinian movies in years, and it's not my fault either! When I went to buy the DVD set, the silly plonkers-that-be had decided NOT to subtitle them...!!!

*giggling*

#8: Author: Ray, Location: Bristol, England

Posted: Thu Aug 26, 2004 6:50 pm

Miss Annersley watched the English countryside go by. It was nice to be back in England, even if it was only for a few days. She wondered what this St Trinnians was like; it sounded as if it ought to be a Catholic School, but the nagging lack of familiarity with the Saint's name bothered her. As did the suggestion of ear plugs.

#9: Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Thu Aug 26, 2004 6:56 pm

..She had ignored the suggestion about the eyemask. Apart from anything else, it would look so undignified to appear as an Inspector with eyes covered. Even if this school was as appalling as her fellow inspector seemed to believe, Hilda wasn't too worried. After all, she'd been dealing with Chalet School middles for a good many years, and some of them would be better placed in a reformatory. Besides, if she covered her eyes, she would loose that ice-making glare....

#10: Author: Ciorstaidh, Location: London

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 3:39 pm

...even the earphones, though, would spoil her wonderful voice, which could go from golden tones reaching every corner without Hilda having to raise her voice to blasts of absolute zero in nanoseconds. Should the school need it, of course. She was merely an inspector, and surely no school would be allowed to remain open if it was not up to scratch in its discipline?

The train pulled into the station serving St. Trinian's, and Miss Annersley disembarked, coming face to face with......

#11: Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 6:12 pm

a schoolgirl who looked as if she came straight from that disgraceful story, "Dr Venables", complete with dyed hair, piercings whereever they could be placed, a skirt that was really little more than a belt and a shirt that revealed more than it concealed. The finishing touch was the dope and the fishnet stockings...

#12: Author: Ray, Location: Bristol, England

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 6:14 pm

"You 'Ilda Annersley?" the girl enquired in a nasal, estuary tone of voice.

#13: Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Sun Aug 29, 2004 6:19 pm

"No. I am Miss Hilda Annersley," that lady replied, at her stateliest. "Who, may I ask, are you?"
"Sure you can, luiv," returned the girl heartily. "I'm 'Elen. I've been sent ter show yer where ter go and ter make sure you get there in one piece."

#14: Author: Ciorstaidh, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 30, 2004 2:00 pm

Helen snickered. "Oh, an' get you back ter the train when yer've 'ad enough."

"Had enough? Don't you mean until the inspection is over?" inquired Hilda, anxiously. "And whilst I think on, I would prefer it if you - and every student at St. Trinian's - referred to me as 'Miss Annersley.'"

"Aw'igh' Miss, if thassa way yer wan' it," drawled Helen. "Car's over 'ere."

Hilda followed Helen, and looked for a driver. To her chagrin, there was none - except Helen.

Ten minutes later, Hilda edged gingerly out of the car, clutching onto the handle for dear life.

#15: Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle

Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2004 2:36 pm

Thiss way miss,' Helen uttered with a sniff, as she led Hilda up the flight of steps to the front door, having abandonded the car in the driveway.

Entering the hallway of St Trinians Hilda noticed it was as empty of pupils as she liked the Chalet School entrance hall to be; though as she followed Helen to the study door she had a nasty feeling she was being watched.

#16: Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England

Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2004 9:14 pm

This feeling was nothing to the shock she got when she was showed into the headmistresses study.

It wasn't the sight of the Racing Post on the desk, not the slight aroma of stale gigarettes and cheap whiskey that did it, although they certainly contributed, nor was it the very odd pictures hung slightly askew, they were just disconcerting, it wasn't even the sight of a third former sat behind the desk, feet resting on the window sill, cigarette haging from her mouth while she was on the phone to what appeared to be a bookmaker, speaking in the broadest Cockney accent while a lady that Miss Annersley presumed had to be the head looked on with a beam. The shock was the comment made by the head as she turned round and greeted Miss Annerlsley.

"I do think mathematics should be taught by practical application, don't you agree?"

#17: Author: Lisa_T, Location: Belfast

Posted: Thu Sep 02, 2004 9:16 pm

*rofl* I really must find a way of getting these with subs even if i have to order them in from the states!

#18: Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle

Posted: Mon Sep 06, 2004 1:14 pm

'Errrr...' the normally unflapable Hida Annersley could think of nothing to say to this.

Meamwhile the young third former finished her conversation with what sounded like 'Ta 'arry. Spike ter yer soon.' putting down the phone she sidled out from behind the desk.

As she passed the St Trinians headmistress she said 'Ta Miss Fritton, it's a dead cert.' Walked passed Hilda without a glance and disappeared from the study after opening the door a mere crack.

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