CBB Advent Calendar: December 9th
The CBB -> Cookies & Drabbles
#1: CBB Advent Calendar: December 9th Author: CBB Triumvirate,  PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 8:42 am

Jo marched the culprit down the corridor to the Head’s study. Caught in the act, there was no escape from the consequences, and Jo had no sympathy to spare. She was only visiting the school for a short time, as she was staying at her sister’s house further round the shore of the beautiful Tiernsee. She reached the Head’s study, knocked lightly on the door and entered at the cheerful invitation.
“Here you are Miss Annersley,” she said. “All yours and covered in guilt.” She grinned as she left the room, seeing the guilty party gazing at the Head with mournful eyes. Jo burst into giggles as she walked back to Die Blumen. She had left the Chalet School before Miss Annersley had become Head at Mlle’s retirement, but had experienced that lady’s skills with wrong-doers for herself. She very much wished that she could be a fly on the wall during this particular interview, for it would be one of the most unusual that the Head had ever conducted.

In the study Hilda Annersley looked at the pitiful object in front of her in something of a quandary. She had demanded that the person responsible for the mess should be brought before her immediately, and Jo had obviously done this. She could have cheerfully wrung that young lady’s neck, but the problem had been left with her to deal with, and deal with it she would.
“Well,” she said. “What have you to say for yourself?” There was no reply to her question and she sighed. “I don’t know what you thought you were doing. You are covered with ink, which will be difficult to remove, and it doesn’t suit your elusive beauty, my dear. What we are to do with you I have no idea.”

Never had Miss Annersley felt so helpless, though inside she was longing to burst into wild laughter. “What Jo was thinking about to bring you here I have no idea,” she continued aloud.

The dejected creature standing before her gave a quiet and apologetic “Woof”, and rolled onto his back on the carpet, waving his paws in the air, clearly asking for a fuss. The sight of a magnificent St Bernard dog, covered in black and red ink, lying in this absurd position was too much for Miss Annersley. She finally gave way to her impulse and shouted with laughter.
“You absurd creature,” she said when she had recovered somewhat. “What do you think you look like?”
Naturally she received no reply to her question, so she took hold of the heavy leather collar and marched the dog round to the kitchen quarters, where she asked Eigen to do his best to clean the ink of the beautiful coat.

Rufus took one look at the kitchen and fled. His mind was busy. ‘Woof woof, slobber woof woof,’ he thought. He dashed to one side and then the other as Eigen tried to catch him.
“Woof woof woof woof,” he barked as he joined in the game. Woof woof woof Woof woof woof
Woof woof woof Joey Woof woof woof Woof woof woof Woof woof woof bath Woof woof woof. Damn”

Eigen had caught him and in one swift movement had put a leash on his collar and was now leading him out to the shed where he proceeded to tie up the dog and pour water all over him.

“Woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner batman woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof woof “ Eigen neatly jumped back as the great dog shook himself and then reached for the leash to untie him.

“Woof woof woof woof walk Joey Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof walk Joey Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof Joey nuisance bath nuisance Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof walk dinner Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof” Rufas ran past Eigen, through the kitchen where he stopped for a moment, “Woof woof woof woof vegetables bad Woof woof woof woof dinner walk Woof woof woof woof “ before carrying on along the corridor with Eigen in chase and out the front door where he proceeded to run as fast as a St Bernard carrying half a ton of water can down the path to the lake, where he jumped in the mud and rolled around as much as she could.

“Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof mud bath mud bath Joey mud Woof woof woof woof Woof woof woof woof” Then dripping with lake stench he continued home to find his dinner.

The noise made the Head look out of the window to see what was happening. The sight of Rufus flying along the path, trailing streams of lake water, hotly pursued by Eigen, who was shouting at him to stop proved too much for her, and she burst out laughing, collapsed backwards into her chair so hard that it tipped over and she found herself lying on her back with her legs waving in the air. Unhurt in anything save her dignity, she hauled herself to her feet and righted the chair as quickly as possible, in case anyone caught her in such an undignified position. By this time Rufus and Eigen had vanished, and peace reigned again.
“I suppose I ought to check the state of the stationery cupboard, since that’s clearly where Rufus got himself into such a mess,” she thought, and suiting action to the thought, set off down the corridor. As she turned into the entrance hall she became aware of another sound – or rather a combination of sounds. The loudest was that of girls’ voices and Miss Annersley frowned, for they were shouting, behaviour that was totally unacceptable in any decent girls school. Underlying this was a heavy rhythmic thumping that she could not identify. It was a little like a very heavy tread, but no one she knew walked as heavily as that. Frowning, she walked swiftly in the direction the noise was coming from, feeling the need to hurry without actually being seen to rush.
She came round a corner and stopped dead, rocking slightly with the force of her passage. In front of her was the stationery cupboard. But it was anything but stationary! It was in the middle of the corridor and ‘walking’ in a rocking sort of motion, lurching from side to side. That was the heavy thumping tread she had heard. Behind it and shouting and laughing, was most of the school.
“What is the meaning of this?” she demanded. “Would any of you care to explain just why you are out of your Form Rooms at this time?” She studiously avoided looking at the cupboard, but was aware that it had stopped in the middle of the corridor as soon as she had started to speak. She walked forward, stepping carefully around the stationary stationery cupboard, and confronted the milling crowd.
“We were following the cupboard,” said Amy. “I’ve never seen a cupboard walk before, have you Miss Annersley?”
“The staff will deal with any problems in the school Amy. You should be doing your mending now, should you not?”
“Yes Miss Annersley.” The crowd began to melt away and before long the Head was alone, looking at the cupboard with a good deal of bewilderment. Like Amy, she had never seen a walking cupboard before, and she dreaded to think about the state that the contents might be in. At least the doors seemed to be shut firmly, for which she was extremely grateful. She walked the rest of the way around it so that she was once more facing the doors, studying it carefully, but she could see no way that it could have moved under its own steam. Equally none of the girls could have moved it like that, rocking form side to side, nor at the speed in which it was moving. The key was in the lock and she gingerly opened the door, expecting to find the contents strewn all over the shelves. However, she was pleasantly surprised to see everything in pristine order, so she locked the doors again. Then after a swift look round to see if anyone was watching her, she looked the cupboard straight in the ‘face’.
“You have had your fun,” she said softly, but in a voice that many miscreants would have recognised with sinking hearts. “Now I suggest you return from whence you came.”
She felt all kinds of a fool for speaking to a cupboard as if it could understand her, but since it had moved under it’s own volition to get here, she felt that it was worth seeing if she could move it back into it’s place in the same way. To her surprise the cupboard gave a funny sort of grunting that was almost a laugh, and then it turned itself around and stumped off up the corridor again. Miss Annersley followed behind it, and when it had settled itself back in its position she again stood in front of it.
“Thank you for your prompt obedience,” she said. “I could wish that some of the girls were so swift. Could I ask you not to wander off again please? It is rather disconcerting to say the least.”
The funny grunting came again and she felt certain that the cupboard would obey, at least whilst there were people about.

 

#2:  Author: Nell, Location: London, England PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:35 am

Laughing Very funny!!! Guessing wildly...

Rufus
Stationary cupboard
"What we are to do with you I have no idea"

 

#3:  Author: Gem, Location: Saltash, Cornwall (holidays), Aberystwyth (termtime from September) PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 10:53 am

Very HappyVery HappyVery Happy

Rufus
Cupboard
"It doesn't suit your elusive beauty, my dear"

 

#4:  Author: Helen P, Location: Cheshire PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 12:58 pm

This one had me laughing out loud when I'm trying to encourage the baby to go to sleep Rolling Eyes Very Happy

Miss Annersley
Stationery Cupboard
“What is the meaning of this?”

 

#5:  Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 1:37 pm

Hilda Annersley
stationery cupboard
"You have had your fun."

So, was it the cupboard that inked Rufus?
woof! Laughing

 

#6:  Author: Chelsea, Location: Your Imagination PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 2:17 pm

Rufus
Stationery Cupboard
"Woof"

 

#7:  Author: Cath, Location: Cornwall PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 4:20 pm

Hilda Annersley
Stationery cupboard
“What is the meaning of this?”

 

#8:  Author: Amanda M, Location: Wakefield PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 4:38 pm

I'm going to follow Chelsea and say

Rufus
Stationery cupboard
"Woof"


Star Wars

 

#9:  Author: Kate, Location: Ireland PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 4:47 pm

Rufus
Die Blumen
"It doesn't suit your elusive beauty, my dear"

 

#10:  Author: Laura, Location: London (ish) PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 5:20 pm

Rufus
The stationary cupboard
"Unhurt in anything save her dignity"

 

#11:  Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 6:52 pm

This is a more difficult one, but a frantastically funny story.


My guess is

Muss Annersley

Stationary cupboard

'And it doesn’t suit your elusive beauty, my dear.

 

#12:  Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!! PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 8:20 pm

Well, I'd have to go with

Rufus

Stationary cupboard

and either 'woof' or 'it doesn't suit your elusive beauty my dear'


*thinks the triumvirate may have been smoking some of those 'funny' cigarettes again........* Wink

 

#13:  Author: Miriam, Location: Jerusalem, Israel PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 9:03 pm

No guesses - my talents don't run to that sort of thing. Just wanted to
a) say thank you
b) query whether anyone else keeps trying to read CBB Triumvirate as CBB Triumphant?

(OK, I know I said I'm not guessing, but was that 'batman' thrown in among all the woofs signficant in any way?)

 

#14:  Author: CBB Triumvirate,  PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2004 9:45 pm

Miriam wrote:
No guesses - my talents don't run to that sort of thing. Just wanted to
a) say thank you
b) query whether anyone else keeps trying to read CBB Triumvirate as CBB Triumphant?

(OK, I know I said I'm not guessing, but was that 'batman' thrown in among all the woofs signficant in any way?)


a) you are very welcome
b) what a wonderful misreading

and (think of the theme tune to the batman TV series...that is the only significance)


And Vikki...some of us have no need of artificial stimulants to our imagination.

 

#15:  Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England PostPosted: Fri Dec 10, 2004 8:08 am

Lovely story and very cheering on a cold grey morning!

*Goes off to work, chuckling*

 

#16:  Author: CBB Triumvirate,  PostPosted: Fri Dec 10, 2004 8:28 am

Quite a few of you got this one:

Rufus
Stationery cupboard
‘It doesn’t suit your elusive beauty my dear’

Rufus enjoyed his chance to 'woof' though! Laughing

 

#17:  Author: Mihiri, Location: surrey england PostPosted: Fri Dec 10, 2004 10:27 am

I missed this one, but just wanted to say that the drabble was great! Thank you!

 

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