I'm working on the completion of it, but slowly.

Oh yes please do continue  :)

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'Yes, I did  say that. I meant it, and, I can safely say that my government and I have…,’
Here Miss Annersley interrupted him, ‘So why are many schools in the United Kingdom being forced to make teachers redundant? Let us examine the state of education in Britain. No, do not interrupt me with the outpourings of the party line, Mr Blair. Is it not true that since the New Labour party came into power, educational funding has fallen, class sizes have risen, testing has risen, and Higher Education is in turmoil?’

‘Our vision for the future means that many more young people will be able to go to university than ever before, we are giving opportunities to a broader spectrum of the populace than ever before, and our educational system is on a sound footing.  For the first time in the long history of education, we are following through on our vision of equality of opportunity for all….’

‘That will do, Mr. Blair. Now, leaving rhetoric aside, and I fear that you have fallen far too easily into the habit of assuming that your audience is fooled by your words, let us analyse, in plain terms, what has been achieved in the educational field by your New Labour Party.

‘Let us look at Infant education.

Here Tony Blair burst into speech. 

‘We have raised standards in the majority of schools, the Key Stage One tests have been instrumental in raising the levels of literacy and numeracy in most parts of the country. I can safely say that we can be proud of our achievements there.’

He sat back on the sofa, feeling that at last he had managed to silence this appalling woman.
 

‘If Infant education in the United Kingdom is so successful, Mr. Blair, why are so many illiterate, innumerate young people leaving school at the age of sixteen? 

He sank back into the seat, feeling like a deflated balloon. Damn the woman, she had an answer for everything. Why the hell hadn’t she  “summonsed” Charles Clarke, why the hell was she holding him responsible?  He was responsible for the big picture, the world stage, looking good and sounding sincere. He was the one who shook hands with Presidents. Why the hell did she ask him questions like that?

‘I, I, well, as you know, not everyone has the same intellectual ability  as..’

‘So you admit that intellectual levels differ, Mr. Blair? So, pray tell me why you are attempting to force the entire secondary school population into Comprehensive Schools?’

‘We in New Labour are confident that Comprehensive schools, with their equality of opportunity, are the finest way for the youth of today to be educated.’

‘So why are you sending your own sons to a school which may be free, in that you do not have to pay any fees, but operates a strict policy of  selection? Your  own daughter does not attend her local comprehensive school either. Pray tell me why not.’

TB found that the sweat was pouring down his back like water gushing from a tap with a broken washer. This damn woman was just too much on the ball.
 
 
 

Tell me, Mr. Blair, am I correct in my understanding that the teachers in primary schools are required to keep detailed records of  the achievements of their pupils?’

‘Yes, they are. We in New Labour have found this to be an excellent analytical tool, it enables the schools to make accurate predictions, based on the individual child’s performance, thus enabling us to plan for the future.’

‘Plan what, Mr. Blair?’

The future of the education system in this country. We are aiming for a target of 50 percent of all school leavers to attend university…….’

‘Let me understand you, Mr. Blair. In order to send fifty % of school leavers to university, the children are regularly assessed by their teachers, who, by the way, are leaving the profession in droves because of the added workload, so, please elucidate for me. If detailed records are kept, why is it necessary to give formal tests to these pupils at the tender age of seven?’
‘We feel that parents have the right to know how their child’s school is performing. It also gives us the opportunity to introduce special measures for schools which underperform.’

He was beginning to relax now, feeling that his feet were on firm ground. He smirked to himself, thinking that he was at last making an impression on this woman who was interrogating him, HIM, so coolly. He looked her straight in the eye, then noticed the steely glint in hers. His heart performed the gymnastics he had so recently experienced, a neat swallow dive down to his boots. He found himself beginning to tremble again, dreading the sound of her well-modulated voice which drove holes the size of the Mersey Tunnel through his best arguments.  What was it about this damned woman? Why was she so calm, so cool. Why did she make him feel like a naughty schoolboy summoned to the Headmaster’s study for a dressing down? Above all, why didn’t she seem to be in the least bit impressed by him? A fleeting thought crossed his mind and he seized on it with relief. He knew it, she was a madwoman. All he had to do was pretend to agree with her, and he had a chance of getting out of here with a whole skin.

‘Ah, but that doesn’t tell them about the school as a whole…’
but Miss Annersley’s voice broke into his justification. 
‘What most of the parents seem to know about their children’s schools is that they are appallingly under-funded. It would appear that parents are paying twice over for education, once through direct taxation, and again through the forced contributions in order to purchase text-books, exercise books, art materials, school funds, educational trips, and teaching assistants. 
Pray explain that to me, Mr Blair.’

TB found himself gaping at her like a goldfish in a bowl. His mind was racing, but it certainly was refusing to connect with his mouth. He looked around him wildly for the glibness that had never before deserted him, but it seemed to have vanished. He felt as though one layer of skin had been stripped away. In a vain attempt to cover this up, he attempted to give her one of his frank, open and boyish smiles, the sort of thing that usually melted the hearts of the assembled Labour party wives. Then he saw, all too soon that it wasn’t working. He hadn’t felt so bad  since the Kelly Enquiry. He could feel that his charm was simply going to get him nowhere with this woman. All those years of practicing, wasted. With difficulty he choked back a sob.

‘These tests, I’m sure you will agree help to ease the transition into Secondary school. It allows for accurate placement in teaching sets, so that  the pupils will be given work that is  suitable for their abilities.’

He sat back with an air of triumph. He’d got her there, she couldn’t quarrel with that.

‘If that is so, Mr. Blair, why are you and your party opponents of the Eleven-Plus and the grammar Schools? Surely that is a means of allocating pupils into appropriate teaching sets?’

‘It has been proved that the Eleven-Plus and the Grammar Schools are elitist, and those who don’t pass these examinations become despondent and disaffected, leading to educational problems in the future. We support Comprehensive education as it gives everyone equal opportunities to achieve their best.’ 

‘So the pupils  who are made  despondent and disaffected by their Eleven-Plus failure are not made despondent by their failure to achieve high grades at Key Stage two? It appears to me that this does give them equal opportunities, unfortunately they appear to believe that they are opportunities to be disruptive and to neglect their studies in favour of preventing others from learning. Indeed, one reads of the bullying culture, even of deaths caused by pupils  in these schools.  Please explain why it is beneficial for bright pupils to be jeered at by the less able, and to be made to feel that their abilities are a shameful burden to be born by attempting to fit in with the prevailing yob culture?’
 
 

‘Well, Mr. Blair? Do you have any sensible comment to make? Or do you prefer to continue to insist that all is well with Secondary education?  Are you absolutely convinced that all schools are hitting the targets? Or  are you deliberately ignoring the reality?’

‘We have inaugurated a policy of ensuring that all pupils have a full and complete exposure to technology, and that ICT is taught in all schools, so that our young school leavers are ready to take their place in the global village.’

‘More rodomontade, Mr. Blair. Is it not the truth that far too many pupils are leaving school with minimal literacy and numeracy skills, that operating a computer  will play very little part in their lives, if they are able to find a job when they reach the age of sixteen. In the meantime, they are encouraged to continue in the  belief that to obtain a Grade F or G  in their GCSE examinations represents a  significant academic achievement. What then for them, Mr. Blair. Where is Britain’s industrial and manufacturing base for them to work in? Pray tell me, where will they complete an apprenticeship in a skilled trade so these poor unfortunate young people are enabled to hold up their heads and speak with pride of their employment?’

I see that you are not making any response to my questions, Mr. Blair. Is that you are incapable of answering them, or do you feel that silence is the wiser course?  You have just told me that all secondary pupils are given a wide exposure to Technology. I have been informed that in one secondary school, the pupils’ exposure to ‘Food Technology’ as it now known, is limited to learning how to make up packets of  pre-prepared foods; for example, when told that they are to learn how to make a lemon meringue pie, the pupils are told to bring in a packet of the mixture, ready to roll pastry, and an egg. Do you really think that this is a proper way to teach the young  how to run a household?  Surely they should be learning how to create nourishing  meals from fresh ingredients. I find this goes a long way to explain the trend towards obesity in the young people of Britain today. It seems to me Mr. Blair, that your Government confuses the commissioning and publication of reports with the  action necessary to remedy these situations.’

‘Now, Mr. Blair, shall we turn our attention to Further and Higher Education? Would you kindly explain why these branches of an educational system which was once the envy of the world, are now so under-funded that you, in  spite of the opposition of many MPs of your own party, are proposing to charge what are known as ‘Top-up fees?
‘Why, Mr Blair, do you encourage young people of low ability, with few prospects, to take courses at FE Colleges which will, in spite of your claims to the contrary, fit them for very little, courses which they take because they frequently cannot find decent employment suited to their abilities?  The FE colleges once, quite rightly, had the reputation of  assisting young people to acquire the theoretical and academic  components of their chosen trades. They helped to turn out skilled work-people, whether car mechanics, carpenters, joiners, bricklayers, plumbers, painters – oh, too many trades to mention. But all these young people had one thing in common – the desire to learn to do their jobs properly. Now, they become vegetable packers or waiters. What  will Britain do when people can no longer find someone to perform a job of work? Well, do you have anything to say in response to that, Mr. Blair?

He looked at her and gulped. Oh Lord, why hadn’t he seized the initiative right at the start/ He should never have let her get a word in edgeways. Perhaps if he turned on a little charm now and asked her to call him Tony, it might work. He looked her right in the eye, and the tentative smile on his face ran away shrieking in terror, and the words died in his throat. He licked his lips which had suddenly acquired the texture of the Sahara Desert, and he felt the sand slowly covering the whole of his mouth. There was only one thing left for him to do. He slowly shook his head and looked at her pleadingly. She appeared to take not the slightest heed of his feelings, and then continued in her calm  implacable voice.
 

'If young people who wish to study at university must incur this mountain of debt. How will those from poorer homes manage? I see that you are not answering  any of these questions. Tell me, Mr Blair, am I going too fast for you to understand?  Correct me if I am wrong. In  order to attend university, young people are obliged to take out student loans in order to pay for their tuition fees and living expenses. This ensures that the beginning of their working lives are spent  in  repaying these loans. What incentive does that offer for them to place their education and training at the service of their own country? Have you never heard of the term ‘Brain Drain’? Tell me, what is to prevent these young people from marketing their skills abroad? Or what is to prevent them from declaring bankruptcy after three years?' 

Here, he was moved to speak, at last finding something to say. ‘In the USA, it’s quite customary for students to manage with loans, and by getting jobs, so I don’t see why that cannot happen in the United Kingdom’ 

Here Miss Annersley’s voice cut in incisively. ‘But in America, Mr. Blair, they have a system which  enables  students to work their way through college. For example, they work for so many hours in the college library, or by clearing tables in the refectories, or in other work around the colleges. This is built into the system. Here, there are no such schemes, and British students are dependent on the vagaries of the British economy for employment which often conflicts with the hours  which they need to study.' 
 

Reading hot off the press.....!  :D

*realises that legs aren't suitable for little skirts and quicky changes to trusers once more. Keeps pom poms cos they're fun*

Keep this going,Jennie, it's really good.

I am the original quick change artiste - it comes from years of acting in plays and playing lots of characters. I was four characters in one play once (Terry Pratchett's Lords and Ladies, for useless trivia buffs).

Oh, and I'm sorry, I meant to tickle your knees but I was fastening my shoes at the same time.

*adds to the pleas for more*

*wonders how Lulie got so low that her pom pom only reaches Vikki's ankle*

More please Jennie - can we have Transport policy next?

*thinks Lesley deserves two pom-poms after her Real CS efforts*

*Waves pom poms in air in manner likely to get self arrested!*

Don't care - never had a pom pom before! ;D

Lesley - Claire's Accessories are selling pom-poms at the moment if you feel the need to progress from the virtual variety  ;)

*Xanthe couldn't see the actions that went along with pom pom waving!*

or the nice men in white coats
 

maybe both.  ;D

*thinks very hard*
 

the army.

maybe she would have preferred the men in white coats, if they were doctors

*swoons*

I have been putting in quite a bit of practise lately  ::)

Well, it's something to put on the CV, isn't it  ;D

Hey, my mind was with me. It needed to be so that I could get the meal made properly. 

(have never been able to whistle)

Thank you very much for the men in white coats - I never tire of them - fricasseed! 

With reference to the army - not sure if I ever mentioned I used to hold the rank of Captain in the British Army - soldiers love to follow orders!!! ;) 

We now have enough expertise to enter the synchronised pom pom waving world championships (Adult Version). ;D

Lol!!  That makes you a Pongo, then, Lesley.  ;) ;) ;)

I am so very very frightened and indeed disturbed by this... no, really, it has sent my mind boggling in a way that can't be good for it...

A well-known Air Force saying is 'Where the Army goes the pong goes'!!!

Steve was in the RAF for 26 years!!

Rather surprised that an ex-Army Captain hasn't heard it!  My son-in-law's brother - a fish head - (Royal Navy) also knows the term.  They call the RAF Penguins - all flap and no fly!!

I'm assuming that will be your multiple personalities, Lesley. ;)

*wonders if anyone knows what I mean*

Which one, Pat? I've worked in three - Catterick, Hannover and Berlin. Not a midwife though so never on maternity wing. I worked mainly on male surgical wards - looking after fit healthy young men. - *sigh* - such difficult work! ;)

Lesley, I'm sure you didn't have this attitude, and I hope that times have changed since then anyway.  I saw exactly one officer's wife the whole week I was there, and she was a RAF wife.  I have to say that Rinteln had a very bad reputation at that time.

Pat, that's AWFUL!!!

I have to say that i wouldn't have stood for the hospital thing now, but I have so much more self confidence than I had then!  Also, when you are in the forces, or married to someone who is, you accept the rank business as a fact of life!

Lesley, how shocking! Such liberal behaviour!!! ;)

I was never a very good officer - always felt it was rather silly!

*wonders if said silliness involved pom-poms*  ;)

I never had pom poms at the time - never had any until KB and Xanthe gave me some a few days ago!

*Spits three pom poms out, opens Study door to allow 3 million pom poms to flow out onto landing, takes deep breath to prevent suffocation!*

Thank you Vikki, much appreciated. ;D Returns huggle!

*Watching cats attack pom poms!*

Was the hospital really shaped like a swastika? That's what C always claims, and we're never  quite sure whether to believe him or not... if it's true, it explains a lot 8oo

Glad the cats like them Lesley!!

*Giggles*

Picture of Lesley as Capt. Kirk being burried underneath the tribbles.

*shaking head to rid self of that mental image*

*giggling*

Imagining the news report "And in Rochester this evening, there was a rain of pom-poms..."

8oo I always did like that episode! 8oo

Go Hilda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Quote:

I always did like that episode!

Wonders if anyone else noticed that tribbles' appearance and reproductive habits were wickedly plagiarized from Heinlein's Martian flat cats. (Always wondered if it was acknowledged in illegible small print.)

Though the effect on Klingons was unique....

Neither of us have heard that!  Given the nature of the Nazi regime, I wouldn't be surprised if it was!!

A bit random, but very amusing!!! ;)

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