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Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/3 p2
http://www.the-cbb.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=14&t=7882

Author:  Mia [ Mon May 17, 2010 8:57 pm ]
Post subject:  Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/3 p2

“Miss Annersley? Commander Christie’s here again to speak with you.” Rosalie Dene put her head briefly around the door of the library. Hilda Annersley leapt almost out of her seat with surprise, sending the correspondence she was correcting flying across the desk and onto the well-scratched parquet.

“What, again? Oh good grief!” Miss Annersley wailed, running her fingers through hair that already looked like it had missed its morning brush. Rosalie politely ignored the biro entangled within its depths. “What on earth does he want this time?”

“He didn’t confide in me!” Rosalie said, crossly, stooping to pick up the fallen papers. She noticed that Hilda had only doodled on them. What was it? She squinted to read the untidy writing but Miss Annersley snatched them back.

“Oh do go away, Rosalie. Send in that bloody man.” Once she was sure Rosalie had gone, Miss Annersley dashed across to the shelf and pulled out her copy of Jamaica Inn, extracted the bottle of Old Jamaica Rum, took a quick swig, pushed the bottle back in, replaced the book, belched, and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand in seconds, turning around just as Michael Christie walked in. Unfortunately she could do nothing about the resulting dust cloud from the surrounding books and for a few seconds they could only cough together.

“Good morning, Hilda,” Michael puffed out his chest and strode over to the window. Miss Annersley took refuge behind her crowded desk.

“Hello, Michael. I’m rather busy…”

“It won’t take long.” Michael waved an imperious arm, unfortunately becoming entangled in the drapes at the window, producing another dust cloud.

“Don’t you ever dust?” he demanded, his dialogue momentarily forgotten.

“Heavens, no,” Miss Annersley fished in her handbag for a cigarette. “Well, what do you want, Michael? Spit it out!”

Author:  JB [ Mon May 17, 2010 9:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Thoroughly approve of the lack of dusting - and am now pondering which books would be good hiding places for the rest of the alcohol.

Thanks Mia.

Author:  PaulineS [ Mon May 17, 2010 9:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

thank you it seems as if this is an alternative universe!

Author:  Mia [ Mon May 17, 2010 10:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Thanks for the comments! Yes it is an AU :lol:

“Well, you know this tale of my great-ancestor’s treasure?” Commander Christie offered his friend one of his own cigarettes and lit it for her.

“Um, yes, of course!” Miss Annersley hadn’t been listening when he had previously told her, instead she had been thinking about where to go for lunch around the Platz. People had said good things about the new chef at the Auberge… It was a while before she realised that Michael had finished speaking and was looking at her expectantly.

“Er, I think you’re quite right, Michael. Good scheme.”

He grinned at her, showing his magnificent teeth. “I thought you’d say that! You are clever, my dear. Far too clever for this place. How long have you been here now?”

“Oh, years,” Miss Annersley said. “Far longer than I care to remember.”

“Shall we have a little drink?” Commander Christie suggested.

“Why not?” Miss Annersley swung her feet up onto the desk, admiring her shapely ankles. Michael Christie went over to the bookshelves and extracted the whisky from behind Flemington.

Just then the telephone rang, but Hilda solved that problem by simply picking the receiver up and replacing it with a crash.

“So if you’re not joining Carey and I for the weekend, despite our desperate pleas, what are you doing?”

“That would be telling, Michael.” Hilda clinked her glass against Michael’s and swallowed it. “No, I thought I’d stay here and prepare for the Inspection.”

“What Inspection?”

“Oh, it’s the most ridiculous thing, darling. Just because twenty of the more tiresome girls in Inter V got themselves stuck half-way up a mountain and were accidentally left there for several days they’ve decided we need to be Inspected. Again.”

“Madge? Oh dear.”

“Yes, but Joey and Nell backed her up.” Hilda narrowed her eyes into the famous Annersley glare.

Author:  Liss [ Mon May 17, 2010 10:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Sorry I didn't comment on part one, but I was making Katie's dinner - I hope you'll forgive me :( . LOL at the famous Annersley glare!

Author:  Alison H [ Tue May 18, 2010 6:40 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

LOL, I'd forgotten about the pirate treasure - I think EBD'd been reading Enid Blyton books when she wrote that bit. Love the glare!

Author:  janetbrown23 [ Tue May 18, 2010 6:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Has Michael followed Hilda to Switzerland. I always thought there was an attraction there? This looks great fun.

Author:  KathrynW [ Tue May 18, 2010 8:49 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

:lol: This is brilliant Mia, can't wait to see more of it!

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Tue May 18, 2010 11:17 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

:lol: This could be a very interesting and unseen side to Miss A.! Thankyou, can't wait to see where this goes.

Author:  Mona [ Tue May 18, 2010 11:45 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Fascinating start Mia, I'm looking forward to seeing more of this!

Author:  Elle [ Tue May 18, 2010 11:53 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

I am liking your Hilda very much Mia! Somehow she is reminding me a little of Nell Wilson the way I write her. Maybe it is something to do with all the alcohol she has stashed in her office? I am already waiting with baited breath for the next installment.

Author:  *Aletea* [ Tue May 18, 2010 6:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

It's awfully good, Mia. I'm not sure the Hilda we know and love would speak like that though!! :lol:

Author:  Carys [ Tue May 18, 2010 8:05 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Squeeee this is fabulous Mia. I'm sure Hilda needed a stash of alcohol to cope with the girls (and some of the staff), I'm wondering where she hides the Gin!

Author:  Abi [ Tue May 18, 2010 8:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

:lol: :lol: Haha, love Miss Annersley in this!

Author:  Liane [ Tue May 18, 2010 9:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

:D I like this! Thanks Mia.

Author:  Mia [ Wed May 19, 2010 5:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

Ten hours later, Hilda made her weary way home from another successful medicine party. Although technically obviously not a medical expert, she had worked with doctors for many years and was well-versed in the medical world. More importantly Hilda was very popular guest at such events and always managed to have a good time, feted by many doctors who adored her and appreciated her lively, sparkling conversation and endearing personality. Truly Hilda was a star in her own little world. She had enjoyed the evening and had many an entertaining medicine party story to tell her friends.

Author:  PaulineS [ Wed May 19, 2010 6:15 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 19/5

thank you :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Author:  Liss [ Wed May 19, 2010 8:44 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors

PMSL :mrgreen:

Author:  Alison H [ Wed May 19, 2010 8:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 19/5

So much more fun than English tea at Freudesheim with a badly-behaved dog jumping all over you ...

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Thu May 20, 2010 9:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 19/5

Alison H wrote:
So much more fun than English tea at Freudesheim with a badly-behaved dog jumping all over you ...


Agreed! Thanks for the update.

Author:  La Petite Em [ Thu May 20, 2010 9:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 19/5

Thank you very much, this looks fab!

Author:  Mia [ Mon Sep 20, 2010 9:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 19/5

"Hilda! What are you doing out here? Didn't one of the doctors drive you home?" Miss Wilson, or Bill to her friends, jumped out from behind a rock and brandished some scissors. "Will you cut my hair please?"

"Not here, darling. Come back to the School. I've got some pink wine in the fridge and you can have a glass. I know your tolerance!" Hilda laughed, surveying her old friend with a fond smile. "Dr A offered, but Dr G was there too, and it was all a bit complicated!"

"Anyway, back to me," said Bill, with the arrogance that always left Hilda and their other friends a bit breathless, "Do you think you could cut me a shorter fringe and maybe some layers? Should I dye my hair? What if it turns green? I'm all of a dither. I think I need a little sleepy."

"Let's go to the school and scare up Jeanne." Hilda suggested, linking her arm and slowing her pace down to a snail's crawl appropriately. "She's no doubt been baking all evening and we might as well have some cake before we cut your hair. I often find a couple of glasses of wine helps me get it straight."

Author:  Liss [ Mon Sep 20, 2010 9:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

Oh, Mia, you absolute fucking legend! :heart:

Author:  Mia [ Mon Sep 20, 2010 10:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

Thanks pottymouth!

Author:  jmc [ Tue Sep 21, 2010 4:28 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

:rofl: :rofl: Enjoying this very much. Thanks

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Tue Sep 21, 2010 8:39 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

I would love to see that haircut! :lol: Thankyou.

Author:  KathrynW [ Tue Sep 21, 2010 8:46 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

Another vote for the haircut! I reckon Miss A should just put a bowl on Bill's head and cut round it :lol:

Author:  Abi [ Tue Sep 21, 2010 9:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

Oh, help! :shock: :lol:

Author:  Katherine [ Tue Sep 21, 2010 10:36 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

KathrynW wrote:
Another vote for the haircut! I reckon Miss A should just put a bowl on Bill's head and cut round it :lol:

A nice asymetric bowl.

Author:  JennieP [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 9:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

I was sulking in bed reading the CBB on my phone when I found this because everything I should be doing was Just Too Boring to get out of bed for. It made me laugh so much I sprung out of bed, hopped in the shower and went into work. Who needs self-help when you have the CBB?

(Obviously, everything remains Just Too Boring to actually do any of it, but that's a different matter...)

Thanks, Mia!

Author:  Helen P [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 2:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

*Splutters* :lol:

Brilliant!

Author:  Mia [ Sun Mar 20, 2011 6:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

By the time that Hilda and Bill had returned to the school, the haircut plan, like so many of their great plans, had been forgotten for the wont of it involving physical effort. Upon investigation, both Jeanne and Karen had thoughtlessly taken themselves off somewhere. Bill immediately took herself off to the kitchen to prepare a tasty meal whereas Miss Annersley popped open a bottle of Buck's Fizz, the only drink available due to the sad absence of shopping opportunities, immensely proud of herself for overcoming her usual irrational phobia of losing a hand.

A wail from Bill indicated the usual crisis with a bay leaf but Hilda hardened her heart. She had work to do!

"Rosalie!" she shrieked, not expecting the lazy blighter to be there. Rosalie, hitherto such a hard worker, had recently become very lazy and opinionated after an unfortunate error had been made during Abendessen and she had been given a grown up's plate instead of her child's one. "Oh curse that girl! I will have to do my own typing!"

She eyed the computer doubtfully, but the importance of her article for the next issue of The Chaletian moved her to reach out a hand and tap the keys until the screen was filled with words.

Feeling dizzy from the strain of working, Hilda closed her eyes. A little sleepy would set her up for the bollocking she would give Rosalie and for dealing with Bill's histrionics. Grizel was also due round later and Hilda knew from the grapevine that she had had a trying few days and would want to talk about it. Hilda wondered whether Grizel would ever take up her suggestion of a blog. Hilda's own blog had been running for years and had featured many an interesting piece. Reflecting on how fabulous she was, Hilda relaxed.

As luck would have it, it was mere moments before the glorious silence (Bill excepted of course, but Hilda always ignored her anyway) was shattered with a manly shout of anger.

Author:  KathrynW [ Mon Mar 21, 2011 1:04 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

Mia wrote:
"Rosalie!" she shrieked, not expecting the lazy blighter to be there. Rosalie, hitherto such a hard worker, had recently become very lazy and opinionated after an unfortunate error had been made during Abendessen and she had been given a grown up's plate instead of her child's one. "Oh curse that girl! I will have to do my own typing!"


I think this illustrates very well the danger of giving the help anything more than a child's plate. Thank you for an illuminating post.

More please!

Author:  Liss [ Tue Mar 22, 2011 6:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Smoke and Mirrors - updated 20/9

KathrynW wrote:
Mia wrote:
"Rosalie!" she shrieked, not expecting the lazy blighter to be there. Rosalie, hitherto such a hard worker, had recently become very lazy and opinionated after an unfortunate error had been made during Abendessen and she had been given a grown up's plate instead of her child's one. "Oh curse that girl! I will have to do my own typing!"


I think this illustrates very well the danger of giving the help anything more than a child's plate. Thank you for an illuminating post.

I couldn't agree more!

Lovely, thank you, Mia! I almost feel like I'm getting to see a side of Hilda I never realised!

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