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Eigen's troubles
http://www.the-cbb.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=5322

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Fri Nov 28, 2008 5:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Eigen's troubles

This is the first time I've tried to write a drabble, so please be forgiving! I wasn't sure if this was the right board, but it seemed to fit under "slightly random stories". Please tell me if it's wrong. Any feedback will be appreciated, particularly improvements I could make (like getting a plot). Thanks!

- X -

It had been a very long day in the kitchen, and aside from anything else it was incredibly hot. Eigen, irritated anyway by his sister oppressing him and forcing him to keep going with his manual labour when he wanted to do nothing more than go and relax against a log in the forest, had growled unpleasantly at everyone all day, and was thoroughly getting on everyone’s nerves. Eventually, Marie snapped.

“Stop it,” she growled in the German native to them. “Go over there and wash up those pans. I want no more grumbling.”

He glared insolently at her but dared not disobey. She had been known to use the heavy iron poker in the corner against him more than once, and he didn’t relish the thought of it happening again. All the same, when he saw the giant silver pots which held the gravy for the Chalet School lunch, he heaved a great sigh. He could easily spend the next hour here, scrubbing away, until his upper body strength was exhausted and he felt like nothing more than sleep.
Just then, Madame Bettany came into the kitchen, Fraulein Joey trailing behind her. Eigen didn’t bother to glance around. Fraulein Joey was often good for a quiet talk in his duller moments, for she didn’t try to look down on the servants like some of the native girls did. He was in a thoroughly bad humour, and he hoped everyone would leave him alone. Joey, who, like some of the girls, was also suffering from the heat, looked none to friendly, but she left the actual conversation to Madge, not trusting herself to apply the manners her sister insisted on so strenuously.

“Marie, come here,” the former ordered. There was an edge to her voice which wasn’t usually present, and Marie jumped. Eigen, however, went red. He had an all too good idea why they were here.

“Ja, Madame?”

“I wish to know why Rufus and Zita have been neither fed nor watered today. Fraulein Joey tells me that they were incredibly dehydrated when she went to visit them. This will not do! I placed you in charge of their everyday care. If you aren’t up to it, I must consider hiring another servant.”

“I am sorry, Madame,” said Marie meekly. “I sent Eigen out to do it this morning. I do not understand why it has not been done. Eigen, hergekommen!”

He dragged his feet until he was in front of them, unable to face his mistress. Usually he was a keen worker, equally capable of doing both the more strenuous male jobs and also of helping with the cooking when needed. But for the last few days it had been so hot, and he had watched enviously as the girls were allowed to lounge outdoors or take walks up the easier of the mountains into the fresher, cooler air. He, meanwhile, was ignored. So he had simply ignored them in return. Not that he could say this to Madame.

“Why were the dogs not given proper food and water?” she demanded icily. He shuffled slightly, then answered as honestly as possible,

“Marie made me clean up the porridge Fraulein spilt at breakfast, and I forgot.”

“That is most disgraceful, and simply not an excuse.”

There was something in her tone which roused the worst in Eigen, and he looked up suddenly, sparks flying from his eyes.

“If others were not so careless, and it was not always on me to do all of the work, then perhaps I should not forget things. I am a human too, and yet you expect me to work while you are lazy and thoughtless.”

He was stopped in his tracks by Marie cuffing him soundly. She was blushing and made haste to apologise the Madame, who had been so good to them, they were so grateful, she didn’t know what had got into Eigen. He, meanwhile, stood where he was, glaring at all three of them alternately. Madge listened in silence to Marie’s apologies and then bowed her head.

“That may be, Marie, but I cannot excuse such behaviour. I am afraid that I shall have to take a week of Eigen’s wages and, should it happen again, I shall find myself unable to continue hiring him. For now, though, we shall say no more after an apology. Then the dogs can be fed and he may go back to his work.”

All three looked at Eigen, who met their eyes fearlessly. But then something in Madame’s eyes told him she meant what he said, so he mumbled what might have passed for an apology in German. Madge, true to her word, left it there after bidding him to remember his position in future, but Marie was not nearly so forgiving. Somehow Eigen managed to get through the rest of the day, but he felt that it was a long time before he was trusted again.

Author:  Chelsea [ Fri Nov 28, 2008 6:17 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Wow - I do not like Madge there at all.

Interesting start ChubbyMonkey.

Author:  Emma A [ Fri Nov 28, 2008 8:02 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

A week's wages!? That's a bit steep. Poor Eigen.

Go on, ChubbyMonkey - this is a good start.

Author:  PaulineS [ Fri Nov 28, 2008 8:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

I think the heat has got to Madge as well. Hope she reconciders and employs more staff.

Author:  Alison H [ Fri Nov 28, 2008 11:51 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Good to see Eigen's take on life at the CS.

Author:  Liz K [ Sat Nov 29, 2008 10:12 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Oh dear, poor Eigen. :(

Author:  Lesley [ Sat Nov 29, 2008 11:26 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

A week's wages seems very steep for one piece of forgetfulness - I also think the heat has got to Madge. After all Eigen is only the same age as Joey, isn't he? She would not have been so harsh had it been one of the girls.


Thank you.

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Sun Nov 30, 2008 8:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

I noticed a mistake in the last installment - if it was summer, presumably Zita would be with her rightful owners. I apologise! Please just assume that only Rufus is there.

After a couple more weeks the school had broken up and the Chalet stood empty. Like a proud old lady it stood alone, trying to keep the impassive face it had had all along, trying not to crumble inside. At least, it was Eigen’s job to make sure that it didn’t. Marie had moved down to Innsbruck for the month, a friend of hers having secured her a temporary position as a maid in one of the big hotels that needed extra staff to deal with summer visitors. Madge, on hearing this, had nodded, and said she was pleased that this was the case, as she imagined only one of them would be needed to oversee general cleaning and maintenance during the holidays. Eigen had been volunteered, much against his will. He had hoped to spend the month up in the mountains with a herdsman Uncle, learning a new trade. He knew and appreciated all that Madame had done for him, for his father refused to keep him unless he brought home wages now, but he hoped he wouldn’t spend his whole life at the beck and call of the young ladies.

The first week had been spent in the idyllic bliss he had sought, up the Mondschienspitze, tending to the cows and goats. He lived off crusty black bread and strong cheese, with nothing but the sweet milk or pure mountain water to drink. Then, eight days after he’d gained such freedoms, his father had come marching up and ordered him home. He was supposed to be looking after the Chalet, and if Miss Bettany ever found out that he had neglected his duty thus, she would surely get rid of him. He said goodbye to the mountain with regret.

Coming home meant going to the Chalet every day, until mid afternoon. He was supposed to be cleaning, but after a cursory sweep of the halls and a general check that nothing major had happened to the building he would lie in the enclosed grounds and daydream, the sun still pounding on his face. Then, when he did return home, he would be expected to help his father chop wood, carry heavy objects around, and otherwise make himself useful. He became deeply resentful of Marie, who had one afternoon a week where she could come home and see that the family were coping without her, in fact much better than usual for her wages were greatly welcomed. The tales she told, of seeing the great town and exploring with another maid she had befriended, made Eigen wildly jealous and he became more resolved than ever to rebel.

His downfall came the day before Madame was due back, and just three days before the start of a new term. Part of the list of chores he had been left was to polish the floors, which required a lot of effort to keep looking presentable. He had assumed that he could put it off until the last day, for any earlier and they would have to be done again, but disaster had struck.

One of the kitchen cupboards, which had been wobbly for some time although Eigen had never bothered to secure it as Madame had asked some two months ago, had eventually given up and flung itself to the floor in a fine fit of temper. The resulting mess dismayed poor Eigen’s heart, for it was clear that this would take some time to fix. Horror dawned in his eyes as he realised the full implications. Madame had expected him to attend to general jobs like this, not important enough for the day to day routine but which needed doing, and now she would know that he hadn’t. It was all that he could do not to roll in the mess around him, crying. His father had already said that a moth old enough to earn money and which did not do so would be thrown out of the house.

Thankfully, he just managed to keep his head. Flying along the lake path at a speed never before seen, he reached home, where he begged his mother to come and help. Soon, she and Marie, who had come back a day early for a rest before she resumed her old position, were sweeping and mopping with a will, while a barely consolable Eigen put his heart and soul into his polishing. Truly, this was God’s punishment for his idleness the rest of the time.

Worse was to come. An hour earlier than expected, by virtue of having made an exchange of trains Madge had thought would be impossible, a trio of people appeared as the kitchen wasn’t half clean and Eigen was still only doing the stairs. She dropped her light suitcase and looked around. Joey, the ever insuppressible, looked around and said cheerfully,

“Welcome home chaps.”

Author:  Lesley [ Sun Nov 30, 2008 9:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Poor Eigen - feel sorry for him because he didn't get a proper holiday - but he has brought some of this on himself!


Thanks.

Author:  leahbelle [ Sun Nov 30, 2008 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Really interesting to read about Eigen. Thanks!

Author:  PaulineS [ Mon Dec 01, 2008 7:38 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

It brings home the poverty of the region which is mentioned, but not detailed in is effects on individuals. Eigen wants a job which is similar to this friends but poverty and lack of money in winter must make it difficult.

Author:  Alison H [ Mon Dec 01, 2008 11:27 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Poor Eigen.

Don't worry about the EBDisms - makes it all the more authentic!

Author:  ChubbyMonkey [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 4:28 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Here's the third and final part of the drabble. Sorry it's so short! Plot bunnies have all been eaten by homework and impending coursework.

- X -

Ascertaining what had happened didn’t take Madge long, once Marie had explained the mess in the kitchen. She sent Joey and Grizel upstairs to unpack the cases, bidding Joey unpack her own as well. Then she turned to Eigen, but that young man was working studiously and doing his best to avoid her eyes. She left to start sorting out classrooms, thanking Marie and her mother for their generous offer to stay on and help as long as it took them to polish the floors. Thanks to hard work and help on the part of her two first pupils, Madge had everything under control by Kaffee und Kuchen, which meal Marie served with gusto.

While Madame and Fraulein’s Joey and Grizel ate the fancy bread twists and sweet, milky coffee to which they were accustomed, Eigen skulked in the kitchen, doing his best to ignore Marie’s scolding’s. Their mother had already left to go and see to the rest of her brood, so he was the mercy of his elder sister, an unenviable position. Worse was to come. Once she had finished her meal, Madge called for Marie to come and clear away while Eigen went to the study to be interviewed. Madge’s pretty face was not angry, but there was a grim determination to get to the truth which made itself apparent as soon as Eigen bowed his way into the study.

He stood and listened to Madge’s well meant lecture on the importance of helping those who rely on us in silence, but when she asked his reasons for doing so he lifted his eyes slightly. Could he convince her not to fire him, as he was sure must happen? And so, encouraged by Madge’s willingness to listen and gentle demeanour, he explained. He told the tale of how his friends were able to spend their summers in the mountains, wandering after the cattle and goats and not having to engage in heavy labour like him. He added that it had always been his intention to become a cowherd, but when Marie had heard of the position his father had forced him to ask for work too. His family wouldn’t support him if he left, and he couldn’t yet afford to support himself. He had simply wanted a few weeks off, just as das madchen had, a small holiday from the daily drudgery which was his life.

Madge understood his feelings more than he might have expected. Sympathetic to his plight, she listened to his diatribe in full before she administered a few well meant words about the sin of idleness and not abusing trusts. By this time, as fair as she had been, Eigen was weeping copiously, although he tried his hardest not to. This was what finally decided Madge; he had learnt his lesson and he wouldn’t do it again. She sent him away, a new wonder in his eyes at the kindness of Madame. It was long before he forgot just how blessed he was to have his position at the Chalet School.

Author:  Lesley [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 5:06 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Awwww, lovely Madge - much nicer than earlier.


Thank you.

Author:  Alison H [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 5:41 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Madge was so lovely in the early books ... and congratulations on your first drabble!

Author:  leahbelle [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 6:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Glad Madge's words helped Eigen. Thanks!

Author:  Elbee [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 9:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Thank you ChubbyMonkey, congratulations on your first drabble!

Author:  Emma A [ Fri Dec 05, 2008 7:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

That was a lovely ending, ChubbyMonkey - Madge was much nicer to Eigen, and tempering justice with mercy.

I look forward to more of your drabbles :P

Author:  PaulineS [ Fri Dec 05, 2008 11:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

I hope Eigen got some holiday if future years as well. Glad Madge was prepared to listen and then was understanding this time.

Author:  Nightwing [ Fri Dec 05, 2008 11:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Nice to see Madge treating Eigen just as she would one of her own students - loved the story :D

Author:  Fiona Mc [ Sun Dec 07, 2008 8:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Poor Eigen. Glad Madge was much nicer to him there

Author:  Vick [ Tue Dec 09, 2008 11:45 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Eigen's troubles

Hopefully Eigen learnt his lesson as Madge was so nice to him.

Thanks ChubbyMonkey :D

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