The Return of Krusher
The CBB -> The Lock Box

#1: The Return of Krusher Author: RowenaLocation: NE England PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2006 9:44 pm

Reposted all together with a small update.I think it's as it was before but the odd words might be changed as I altered when I posted sometimes.

The Return of Krusher

Joey wandered aimlessly along the road outside Freudesheim, wheeling the big double pram with Phil in it while keeping half an eye on Geoff as he ran about beside them laughing and trying to catch a butterfly.
A noise in the distance brought Joey out of her reverie and she came to herself and shouted “Geoff, come here now.”
As the awful sounds came closer and got louder and louder she picked him up, popped him in beside Phil and pressed the pram and herself as close to the edge of the road as she could – she wasn’t sure exactly what the vehicle was that was making the infernal din but she was certain she didn’t want herself or her babies in the road when it arrived.
With a roar like a Tyrolean thunder storm, what could only be described as a ‘horde’ of very large, very powerful, very noisy, chrome and black and red monster motorbikes swept round the corner and bore down on a by now trembling Joey. She shrank back, wishing the hedge would open up and swallow her, and was just drawing breath for a sigh of relief as they swept past, when the lead rider made an arm signal and they all slowed and stopped.
The biggest man Joey had ever seen rose from the saddle of the lead bike, turned and headed back along the middle of the road towards her…

As he approached he removed his crash helmet (black with what looked like a flaming skull device emblazoned across it), and revealed hair immaculately coiled into dainty earphones. He pulled a hairpin from each side and shook his head vigorously to free the plaits which hung ‘Kenwigs’ style to his mid chest.
“That’s better, can’t hear a damn thing in there” he muttered and then, baring his teeth at Joey he enquired politely “sprechen sie Deutsch meine Frau, bitte?, Wie komme ich am besten sur Millies bitte?”
Joey was stunned, could this, this ruffian actually be looking for St.Mildreds? And if so, WHY!!!!
“er, erm,” she stammered. At that moment Phil leaned perilously far out of the pram and shouted “bike bike” at the top of her voice. “Phillippa! Sit down!”
“You’re English” said the man, “thank God for that, I was about at the limits of my Gerry there, and I doubt I’d have understood the directions if you’d given them to me. Anyway, pleased to meet you luv, I’m Krusher” and he held out his huge hand to shake.
Joey tentatively placed her hand in his, shook his finger tips, and resisted the urge to wipe her hand on her skirt. He was sweaty!!! “Nice to … er…meet you, er… Mr. Krusher” she managed faintly.
“So,” he said, “how do we get to Millie’s place then, it is around here somewhere right?”
“Millie’s” said Joey, “I don’t think I know anyone called Milly, most people have Swiss or German names here. Is Milly your sister?” There was no way on Earth she was going to direct this gang of what could only be Hell’s Angels anywhere remotely near a school full of innocent young ladies – what reason could they possibly have for wanting a finishing school! No sir, no way was she letting on, and after all, what other ‘Millies’ could he be talking about.
“Millie’s is a college luv, they teach archaeology and stuff, I’m here to visit a friend” – the leer in his voice as he said ‘friend’ made Joey even more determined to on no account let on that she had any idea what he was talking about.
“Well the only school here is the Chalet,” she waved vaguely in the direction opposite to the school, “and that’s for small children, it’s not a college. Sorry I can’t be of more help, I really must be going, goodbye Mr. Krusher” and taking to her heels she fled, wheeling the pram as if all the Devils of Hell were after her. She must go and warn Bill, and Hilda, to keep the girls indoors until the men could find out what these bikers wanted. Suppose the girls saw them!!! It was just too horrible to think about.
As she reached the door of Freudesheim, Jack was coming down the steps. She flung herself into his arms, crying “Jack, Jack, you have to stop them, help me, make them go away, they can’t have any of our girls – do something Jack, do something right NOW!!!” and, collapsing in his embrace, she sank to the ground, red, sweaty, and to all appearances knackered.

In the distance came the sound of motorbikes starting, the noise creschendoed then faded as the bikes moved off.
Jack helped Joey to her feet, and, calling for the co-adjutor to come and see to the second twins, he took Joey into the house, settled her in a chair with her feet on a footstool and bade her tell him what was wrong.
She poured out the events of the morning, and declared herself positive that the “ruffians” were up to no good and must be kept well away from the school at all costs.
“But Joey, we have no idea who it is they are looking for, or what they want, and we know nothing about them – there might be nothing sinister at all to worry about.”
“Jack, you might be prepared to believe that but I’m not” she declared, “I’m going over to see Hilda right now!” and jumping to her feet she paused only to swathe herself in a lime green hand crocheted shawl she had won in last years raffle, before charging from the room towards the garden path to School.
(The shawl was actually supposed to be a table cloth but Va, the makers, hadn’t dared tell anyone this once Joey had declared it the most delightful shawl she’d ever seen.)

Hilda Annersley was sitting behind her desk putting the finishing touches to the new prospectus, ready for it to go to the printers. She looked up as she heard voices in the outer office, and, recognising Joeys golden tones, snatched off the reading glasses that were THE best kept secret in the Oberland and stuffed them hastily down her bra out of sight.
“Oh, Hilda!” cried Joey, as she burst into the office, “I have just met the strangest man, and he was looking for St. Mildreds!” The story of Joeys encounter with Krusher and his companions poured out rapidly then Joey collapsed on a chair panting for breath and awaited Hilda’s reaction.
“What did you say his name was Joey? Krusher? That doesn’t sound very English to me. Perhaps you misheard who he was looking for.”
“He was definitely English Hilda, his German was execrable and he definitely said his name was Krusher. We must make sure the girls aren’t confronted by him and his gang – I suggest an immediate curfew until Jack makes sure they’ve left the Platz!”
“Oh Joey, my dear girl – we can’t possibly keep all the girls housebound just because you took a dislike to someone who might have a perfectly innocent reason for being here, or indeed have been totally lost and not even looking for St. Mildreds. It’s a shame you didn’t think to ask him the name of his ‘friend’ there. It could be a member of staff or anyone. He might be a relative.”
Joey drew breath and sat up to continue the argument but was stopped by a raised hand.
“No Joey, you know you have always over-reacted and gone off wildly after things. We know nothing about these people and will probably never lay eyes on them again. Anyway the entire school is out on rambles today, and St. Mildreds girls are too and there is no way we can get them all back even if we wanted to. It’s almost time for the thunderstorm or blizzard now, and I have to man the phone for the message from whoever’s turn it is to get stuck in it, so I suggest you run along and get home. There are no barns or huts between here and your door, and if you get wet through Jack will blame me. Run along now do.”
Joey gathered her shawl and her dignity around her and left.
Left alone Hilda pondered – “Krusher. Kruuuuuussssssherrrr. I am sure I’ve heard that name before, but where?”

Meanwhile out on the Platz… Krusher and his companions had found someone willing to give them directions without running away, and were enquiring after both St. Mildreds and lodgings in the area.
“Thanks a lot Madame Courvoisier” said Krusher, “I was beginning to think the only English person here was the mad woman we met earlier. Anyway, we’d better get on now and sort some lodgings out, and let you be about your business.” He shook her hand cordially, bared all his teeth in what he fondly imagined was a pleasant smile, and mounted his bike. “We’ll try the Auberge place first,” he shouted across to his mates, it’s this way round by the road then we have to get off and walk a bit but it’s safe to leave the bikes, we’ll put the colours on the seats and no-one will touch them.”
The engines roared and the bikes moved out leaving Biddy Courvoisier to wonder just which madwoman he had meant, and who exactly from St. Mildreds could be his ‘friend’.

Also on the Platz…
Len, Con and Margot lay on their backs on the short sweet grass and gazed up at a cloudless blue sky.
“It’s not fair,” said Margot, “It’s our turn! And look at that sky! Not a cloud in sight! How are we supposed to be rescued by all those toothsome new interns from the San if the bloody blizzard doesn’t arrive – Damn and Blast it!”
“I know,” agreed Len, “after we hiked all the way up here from the Auberge too – we could have stayed there and made the echoes sing those rugby songs again, there’s only us who understand all the words up here.”
“Annnnnnnd,” said Con, “We’ll have to hike all the way back, no lift in a nice car or ambulance – I bet the bad weather and all those Doctors are being wasted on unappreciative people instead of coming to us! It’ll be bloody Mary-Lou again – she always seems to get more than her fair share.”
“Yup!” agreed Margot, “Oh well, I suppose it’s time we were heading back for abendessen. At least we go home for tea tomorrow, so we have Anna’s cakes to look forward to. Cream cakes almost make up for lack of Doctors.”
As the girls rose and headed off down the path Len was heard to mutter “yeah but cream cakes AND Doctors, now that’s worth having!” She hitched her rucksack into a more comfy position and followed her sisters down the path back to the Auberge and thence to school.

As the trips cut across in front of the Auberge to reach the path down to school, they were watched with interest by the men drinking coffee on the veranda.
“Isn’t that thingy?” “You mean Elle, Coral and Marina triplets,” said Krusher, “Yeah that’s them. I knew we were in the right place, Lulu can’t be far away.” And he smiled a happy smile. “We’ll have a proper look round tomorrow, the college will be out of lessons on a Saturday so it shouldn’t be hard to find her.”
The trips meanwhile after a single chorus of ‘Abdul a Bul Bul Emir’ for luck dashed back to school, arriving just in time to wash and change for abendessen.

Next morning Joey rose early and telephoned Bill to tell her the story of the undesirables hanging around looking for ‘a friend’ at St. Mildreds. Much to Joey’s chagrin Bill was of the same opinion as Hilda, and refused to be in the slightest concerned about the (as Joey saw it) threat to the virtue and moral welfare of her pupils.
“Joey will you please calm yourself before you develop a fever! I am perfectly capable of taking care of the girls, regardless of who may turn up on our doorstep. Good Heavens, we’ve seen off armed robbers, kidnappers, thunderbolts, mad hermits, ravening nazis, Miss Bubb, and dozens of local teenage boys over the years. How much trouble can half a dozen Hell’s Angels possibly give us?”
Joey replaced the receiver with a definite bang and seethed quietly. Why would no one listen to her? She just knew that those bikers were bad news.
As Bill turned away from the telephone Mary-Lou spoke, “I’m sorry Miss Wilson, I was just passing and I’m afraid I couldn’t help overhearing your side of the conversation on account of I stopped to listen. Did you say ‘Hell’s Angels?”
Bill rolled her eyes, reminded herself that it wasn’t cheek it was ‘just’ Mary-Lou, and said “Well it’s not actually anything for you to concern yourself with dear but Mrs. Maynard was a little worried about some motorbikers who are in the area and was just telling me about her encounter with them. Run along now, it’s time for Fruhstuck.” And with that she closed the office door, leaving a rather pale, shocked looking Mary-Lou muttering, “It can’t be, surely it just can’t be…can it?”
OOAO decided that it was just as well Joey had included her in the invitation to English tea that day and made up her mind to find out exactly what, and who, was going on. And then made a mental note to find the wonderbra, just in case…

Meanwhile at Freudesheim, over their light lunch, Joey had decided that it was time that Jack “acted like a man and went out there and did something about those dreadful men, right NOW, if he didn’t mind!” Jack gave a long suffering sigh, whistled for Rufus, and set off, ostensibly to ‘look for the ruffians and see them off’ (yeah right! he thought to himself), but in reality he planned to sly off to the Auberge for a nice cool beer in the shade.
Joey prepared tea for the girls by the simple expedient of ringing for Anna and giving her a list of things to prepare for the meal. She also decided not to mention ‘she knew who’ to the girls in case it frightened them. They were such innocents, they might have nightmares, Con might sleepwalk, Oh! it was all just too much. Joey retired to her chaise longue for half an hour with a damp cloth over her eyes to refresh them before her daughters and their friends arrived.

14 O’ Clock and all was quiet on the Platz. Joey was recovered somewhat and was sitting in a deck chair watching the second twins roll about on a rug. Len, Con, and Margot, accompanied by Ted and Emerance were crossing the garden towards her and OOAO was entering the front gate. Jack was meandering homeward with Rufus having spent a happy hour searching for Hell’s Angels in the bottom of a stein.
The roar of a 1500cc engine shattered the peace.

Jack turned as the bike came to a halt beside him and gulped, the rider was enormous, quite the biggest man he’d ever seen. And Joey wanted him to “see them off!” Knees knocking he stood his ground as the man advanced and removed his helmet…

Joey leapt to her feet in panic then remembered she was trying not to alarm the girls and sat down again. “Oh, that gave me quite a start,” she said, doing her best to appear calm and figuring that, if they could hear the engine, the bike was moving, hopefully far, far away from here. In her fluster she failed to spot the significant looks passing between her triplets and Mary-Lou.
Ted and Emerance had jumped too and now took seats on the rug with Phil and Geoff, to make sure they hadn’t been frightened by the noise.
Phil was trying to tell Ted about the man with the bike, she had taken quite a fancy to him, his hair was just like Mammas, but Ted could only catch about one word in three of the baby’s excited babble. All was settling down to peace when Jack appeared, followed by a very large visitor.
“Joey,” he called, “you’ll never guess who’s here, a friend of mine from my university days, haven’t seen him for years. My wife, Mrs. Maynard, meet Algy.”
Krusher advanced on Joey, hand outstretched, amiable teeth baring grin in place, and started to speak “lovely to meet you Mrs. May...”
His words were drowned out by a chorus of “ALGY!!” followed by “Melvyn?” from OOAO and “Krusher?” from the trips, and an aghast “YOU,” from Joey.
Jack realised something strange was going on but manfully tried to remain in control of the situation, “Algernon Theodore Melvyn de Hoghton actually, but we just called him Algy at uni.” He then realised that his daughters and Mary-Lou seemed to recognise their visitor. “My elder three daughters, Helena, Constance, and Margaret, and their guest Mary –Louise. Have you met before?”
A deathly silence fell over the garden broken only by Phil saying “bike?” in a very small voice.

Joey was the first to recover her powers of speech, and turned to Jack saying, “You were at University with Algy? I don’t believe I ever heard you mention him before?” Jack grinned and replied, “Well I can’t mention everyone I met in my youth darling, and it was a good few years ago now. You must have heard me mention his father, Sir Bernard at some point though, he sent us that huge donation when we were moving the San here to the Platz, remember?
Mary-Lou goggled and turning to the trips mouthed ‘Sir Bernard’ and rolled her eyes. At that minute Geoff howled, “Mamma I need to go potty, NOWWWWWWWWW” and as one the four girls said, “I’ll take him” and Geoff was unceremoniously grabbed from the rug and bundled towards the bathroom, leaving Ted and Emerance desperately searching for an excuse to follow on as they were dying to know what exactly was going on.
This came when Joey, remembering her duties as hostess, asked them to run to the kitchen and tell Anna that Doctor Maynard and guest would be in to tea. As one they rose and trotted off to find Anna, then the trips and OOAO as quickly as possible.
Having run to the kitchen, passing on the message to Anna who was now panicking over what to give ‘the son of Sir Bernard’ for tea, and cadging a plate of lemon biscuits and a pitcher of juice, they followed the sound of excited chatter to the bathroom and confronted the other girls.
Placating Geoff with a biscuit for each hand, Emerance looked Margot straight in the eyes and demanded “Who exactly is this Algy bloke then, and how do you lot know him? Tell us now!”
“We don’t know Algy at all, we know him as Krusher,” said Margot.
“Melvyn,” said Mary-Lou firmly, “I know him as Melvyn, MY Melvyn, and I want to know what’s going on as much as anyone! Algy indeed, and who on Earth is Sir Bernard de wotsit?”
“That’s what we ALL seem to want to know,” said Ted, “How are we going to find out? How are you going to explain to Doctor Jack how you know him? How DO you know him anyway, whatever his name is? And, more to the point, what’s he doing here?”
Emerance and Ted watched expectantly while the trips and Mary-Lou went a particularly unattractive shade of crimson.
Ted suddenly pointed a finger at the girls, “He has a Lancashire accent,” she said, “and Blackpool is in Lancashire. He’s one of those isn’t he? Your holiday conquests? I’m right aren’t I?”
Emerance began to giggle wildly, and spluttered, “Is he yours then Mary-Lou? The one with the seven-inch…” she stopped as Mary-Lou clamped a hand firmly over her mouth and rolled her eyes significantly at Geoff innocently munching his eighth biscuit.
“Well, yes, it’s him,” she said, “and I have sort of been half expecting him but I didn’t think he meant it, not seriously, that is, I thought, well I didn’t think, well, I never thought he’d actually, well, arrive!” and she subsided onto the side of the bath and mopped her forehead with her hankie.
“Oh, Lulu,” said Con in saccharine tones, “Whatever are you going to tell Bill?” and sniggered.
Len and Margot joined in, enjoyed Mary-Lou’s discomfort until Emerance dropped her bombshell, “Well if he’s here, where are his brothers?”
Mary-Lou gasped, “I forgot to tell you, Bill said Hell’s Angels plural! What if they’re all here!”
The trips looked at each other in horror.
Mary-Lou repeated what she’d overheard of Bill and Joey on the phone that morning, ending with “So Aunt Joey is already dead against them, she wants them all gone from anywhere near us girls, and now he’s here and he knows your father, and they know that we know that they know that we know that he’s him and that they’re them and what are we going to DO?”
A strained silence fell, broken only by the sound of Geoff licking the biscuit plate.

“What’s the worst thing they can do to us?” Margot asked in a small voice.
“Send you 12,000 miles to boarding school and make you stay there for four years without visiting,” said Emerance.
“Send you to a school in another country and make you do lessons in two totally foreign languages,” said Ted.
“Mamma spank bad children,” said Geoff, picking up on the atmosphere of general despondency.
Gloomy silence fell once more.
The silence was shattered by Anna, calling for the girls to come and help her take the tea things through to the table. A few hurried whispers and the girls decided that there was nothing they could do to alter the situation and they would just have to keep quiet and ‘hope for the best’ and as Mary-Lou put it with some feeling “hope Melvyn keeps his mouth shut too!”
“It’s either that or climb out the window and run for it,” said Ted, with just a trace of a smirk at Margot’s discomfort.
It was a very subdued party who took their places at the tea table. The girl’s decision to keep quiet might have been a good one but Jack was having none of it.
Fixing Len with a gimlet eye he enquired, “So have you met Algy before then Len?” and awaited her reply with every appearance of interest.
“Ah, we, er, well, that is, not exactly,” she stammered, “we, er, haven’t been formally introduced at all…” she trailed off and her eyes begged Krusher to have pity and help her out.
“We met at the Auberge yesterday Jack,” he said, “The girls were rambling by and stopped to rest and we had a little chat, that’s all.”
Four girls heaved sighs of relief at his words and Mary-Lou bestowed a beaming smile on him.
“And of course I met your lovely (at this point his face said insane while his mouth said lovely) wife the day before, on the road here.”
Joey had the grace to blush.
“Aha!” said Jack, so that was you and your pals. I’d never have guessed it would be you when she was talking about the Hell’s Angels invading the Platz.” The men laughed together and Joey glowered under lowered lids. Heaping five sugars into Jacks coffee she passed it over smiling her sweetest smile, “here you are darling, just how you like it.”
Luckily the vile taste of the coffee kept Jack from remembering that Mary-Lou wasn’t on that particular ramble, and four more sighs of relief were let out.
“Are you really a Hell’s Angel Mr. Algy?” asked Emerance.
“Yup, I’m what they call the Master At Arms for the Blackpool Chapter, but I’m just here on holiday,” came the reply.
Emerance looked suitably impressed though she had no real idea what that statement actually meant. Jack however did and he began to look a tad alarmed. What on Earth had his old friend been doing since their uni days? And what did Sir Bernard think of whatever it was?
“Erm, can I, I mean may I, erm, would you, erm, may I have a ride on your bike please?” she asked, greatly daring.
Mary-Lou gave her daggers over the plate of Anna’s cream horns and the bun in her hand imploded suddenly, showering cream and crumbs everywhere. Under cover of cleaning the crumbs onto her plate Mary-Lou contrived to stab Emerance viciously with her fork and hiss, “Over my putrefying corpse will you go anywhere with him, he’s MINE!!!”
Krusher, who had overheard this little exchange managed to keep a straight face but inside he was cheering. Lulu was the reason he was here, and here he stayed until she had heard what he had to say and agreed with his plans for their future.
Catching Joey’s eye he beamed toothily at her and, looking her straight in the eyes, held out his plate, and asked, oh so politely if he might have another delicious horn.

Jack was dying to know how his old friend had ended up as a fearsome Hell’s Angel, and also how he had spent they intervening years since they were at university together, but didn’t think it was appropriate to enquire in front of his wife and daughters. He had a feeling that some of the answers would not be suitable for their delicate ears.
He was surprised at Mary-Lou, making such a mess of the table, she was usually such a polite, well-mannered young lady, but he had missed the by-play between her and Emerance, and of course, had no idea that Mary-Lou and Algy were extremely well acquainted.
As tea came to a close Jack said, “You must stay to supper Algy, we can catch up on each others news.”
Joey made a face at this, she wasn’t sure if being the son of Sir Bernard de Hoghton made up for being a Hell’s Angel or not, but she knew that this man had told her he was looking for someone at Millie’s and she desperately wanted to know who and why. This thought made her grit her teeth and force a smile as she seconded Jacks invitation. “Do stay, er, Algy,” she said, “It’s not often Jack gets a visitor, especially one from his youth, it’ll be nice for him.”
“Well, alright then, I will, and thank you Mrs. Maynard, it will be good to catch up, and Jack can tell me all the local places of interest to visit while I’m here.”
“How long are you here for exactly?” Joey saw her chance to extract some information and took it. “You mentioned a ‘friend’ when we, er, met in the road.”
Mary-Lou squawked, “LOOK at the time, I must run Aunt Joey, I’ll be late back and Bill will kill me,” and she leapt to her feet ready to beat a hasty retreat.
“Bill?” enquired Krusher in a deceptively mild voice, “Who EXACTLY is Bill?”
A sound very like a suppressed snort of laughter came from Ted and was quickly stifled with a hanky.
Jack’s head turned from OOAO to Krusher and back as he began to realise there was definitely something going on here that he didn’t quite understand.

Just as Jack opened his mouth to speak, Krusher said “I’ll give you a lift on the bike Mary-Lou, you just direct me to wherever it is you’re going.”
OOAO seized her chance of escape and agreed, saying “Thank you, but we have to go now,” with a meaningful look at Jack, and headed for the gate, saying “Thanks for a lovely tea Aunt Joey” over her shoulder and praying Krusher would follow her quickly before Jack gathered his thoughts.
Krusher rose to his full height of 80 inches and did the genial snarly thing again, picked up a cream bun for each hand and waved to Joey and the girls saying (in an Oxford accent that would cut glass) “Lovely feast. Ta-ta for now old things, I’ll call in again Jack and we can catch up, what?”
This so stunned his listeners that he was out of the gate, buns eaten, chin wiped, engine started, and OOAO installed on the pillion seat before anyone left at the table moved.
The engine noise dwindled away in the direction of St. Mildreds and the girls made ‘back to school’ motions. “See you soon Mamma, Pappa” the trips came to kiss Joey and Jack, and Ted and Emerance offered their thanks for the tea as they gathered their hats and made ready to set off down the garden.
“Just one minute,” Jack stopped them. “Why would Algy care who Bill is?”
“Oh Jack Darling!” laughed Joey, “can’t you see that he’s such a gentleman he was worried that the girls were associating with men in an inappropriate way? After all, ‘Bill’ is such a rough sort of name. I’m sure Algy was just being concerned for Mary-Lou’s welfare, look how he kindly offered her a lift to make sure she got back alright. He’s obviously been well brought up to care for ladies.”
Now that she knew his father and had heard his Oxford voice Joey was convinced that Algy was a Gentleman and determined to treat him as such, after all if his father was a Sir, and if Algy was the eldest son, and she made up her mind to quiz Jack all about the family and their estate at the first possible opportunity. After all, when a woman has 6 daughters to get married off, a Sir’s son is not to be sniffed at even if he does have some unsavoury habits of a motorbike nature and Mary-Lou on his pillion.

Mary-Lou took a firm grasp round Krushers waist, well, as far round as she could reach, and held tight as the bike roared off in the direction of St. Mildreds. When the road ran through the trees, Krusher pulled over and stopped the engine. He turned to Mary-Lou and lifted her off the bike, smothering her in a bear hug and planting kisses all over her face. “Did you miss me then my Lulu? I missed you.” Lulu threw off Mary-Lou, silenced the small voice that whispered, “Bill and Aunt Joey wouldn’t like this…” and dragged Melvyn into the nearby bushes, “C’mere and I’ll show you how much I missed you…” silence fell apart from slight furtive rustlings and assorted ‘ooo’s’ from the trees.
Some time later the silence was broken by the flick of a cigarette lighter and the words no woman wants to hear just after wild rampant sex, “Lulu, I need to talk to you, there’s something you need to know…”


Joey meanwhile was on the phone to Bill again. “Yes, they set off about 10 minutes ago, no he’s actually very nice, such a Gentleman, Jack and he were at university together, his father is the Sir Bernard de Hoghton, don’t be silly, I never once said I thought he was dangerous, really Nell, you get the strangest ideas sometimes, I’m sure I never thought for one second there was anything wrong with the man, he’s perfectly respectable!! Anyway, I just wanted to let you know to expect Mary-Lou any minute now, you’ll hear them coming well before they arrive I expect.” And with that she hung up and went to beard Jack in his study with a view to quizzing him on the antecedents of the de Hoghton family.

About 45 minutes later Mary-Lou was heard shouting, “YES, yes, a thousand times yes!” Followed by, “That’s a brilliant idea.”
“I hoped you’d say that” he said.
“And the bit about your…” she was interrupted by a voice calling “Mary-Lou, oh Mary- Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo-ooooooo” and, jumping out of his arms she gasped, “Oh My! We forgot about school! That’s Miss Wilson’s voice, they must be out searching for me.” Clothes were rapidly straightened, then, just as Bill appeared through the trees, Krusher grabbed the wonderbra from a bush and stuffed it in his pocket before turning with a smile, hand outstretched, saying “Miss Wilson I believe?”
“Yes,” she replied, giving a firm handshake and an appraising glance, “and you must be Mr. de Hoghton?”
Mary-Lou could contain herself no longer, “This is Melvyn, Miss Wilson, my fiancé” and she awaited the result of her bombshell.
“Fiancé?” said Bill weakly? “As in engaged to be married? Does your mother know? Does Joey know?”
And then Bill, remembering Joey’s tone during their latest telephone conversation, just knew that Joey was not going to like this development.
“We’re going down to the city tomorrow to buy a ring and telephone Mother, well both our Mothers actually,” said Mary-Lou. “I’ll be leaving for England soon after, but don’t worry about a refund of my fees for the term, I no longer need to worry about money, Melvyn is going to take such good care of me,” and with that she led the way to bike and with a breezy, “See you back at St. Mildreds,” a roar and a screech of tyres, they were gone, leaving Bill wondering if she was hearing things properly. Instead of going back to St.Mildreds she decided to carry on to the Chalet School and tell Hilda, not to mention Matron, Jack, and Joey, the latest news.

There were mixed emotions on the faces of those assembled in Hilda’s office to hear Nell’s news.
“Well Mary-Lou is almost 19, so I suppose as long as Doris has no objection,” began Hilda, only to be cut off by Joey, her opinion of Krusher changing fast, saying “Objections! I certainly hope she will have objections! As though Mary-Lou should be allowed to snaffle, er, I mean, that is, Mary-Lou is far too, erm, good, for that man, we should put a firm stop to this so called engagement right NOW! Poor Len, Con and Margot haven’t had a chance….” Jack’s look made her trail to a halt although her flashing eyes let everyone know that she was far from reconciled to the situation.

By the next morning the rumours were flying all over the Platz, in at least seven languages, and each “true, definite” version was wilder than the last. The objects of all the intense (and enjoyable) discussions were en route to the main Post Office in the city to telephone Mary-Lou’s poor unsuspecting Mother and tell her the news.
Mary-Lou emerged from the phone booth wreathed in smiles, saying, “It’s all fine Melvyn dear, I told Mother everything,” she paused to giggle wickedly, “and she said that as long as I was sure I know what I’m doing it’ll be alright. If Gran were still here she wouldn’t hear of it of course, but she isn’t and Mother says it’s about time I had a bit of fun. She also says she can’t wait to meet you!” and with that Mary-Lou and Melvyn sauntered off sniggering towards the jewellers to choose the biggest, most garish, most ostentatious diamond they could find.

The triplets were meandering down the path, ostensibly running and errand for Miss Ferrars, but in reality discussing Lulu and Krusher in detail and speculating on which, if any, of the rumours were true.
“We simply must get hold of Lulu and find out what’s going on,” said Len, “Mamma had a face like thunder when she left Auntie Hilda’s office last evening so something is definitely up!”
As Con opened her mouth to reply she came to a sudden stop and, mouth opening and closing like a gold fish, pointed to the path ahead…
“Look,” she gasped, “It’s Krusher, in fact it’s TWO Krushers.” Sure enough, heading straight for the girls were two enormous men, grinning amiably yet wolfishly, wearing leathers and denim, and definitely, certainly, they were both the image of Krusher…

Margot meanwhile wasn’t even looking at the two ‘Krushers’ – she was looking past them, to where three more men had appeared on the path, men who somehow appeared strangely familiar; “Oh. My. God.” She said, “Look, there are more of them. Three more!”
Len and Con, squinting into the Sun, noticed something Margot had missed. “They aren’t more Krushers,” said Con, “They’re thingy, thingy and wotsit, his brothers the triplets, you know, from Blackpool.”
“Wayne, Dwayne and Shane,” said Len, quietly. “Now what are we going to do? They’ve seen us!”
Margot turned to her sisters, eyes glinting, and said in honeyed tones, “Well I know what me and ‘my Devil’ are going to do, and you two can join us if you like, there’s lots to go round,” and she flew down the path and, grabbing Wayne and Dwayne, one by each hand, she dragged them into the bushes, leaving Len, Con, and two erstwhile Krushers looking after her in amazement.
Len and Con exchanged glances, and with the almost telepathic unspoken communication between them, followed, Con saying to the Krushalikes, “Hi there, we haven’t been introduced but we’re friends of your er, brothers, and we’ll be back soon,” before vanishing to join her sisters in the happy reunion taking place behind the bush.
Half an hour later the six emerged, fastening zips and buttons, and picking foliage out of crevices, only to find the two Krushalikes had gone.
Margot turned to the ‘other triplets’, placed hands on hips, and demanded, “OK, where are they, who are they, and what exactly is going on around here?”
Wayne gulped, Dwayne blushed, and Shane scratched thoughtfully at his crotch as a silence you could almost touch fell over the group.
“Now,” said Margot, “Or I start screaming for help,” and she smirked an evil smirk as Wayne, taking a deep breath, began to talk…

“The thing is,” he began, “We can’t really tell you all that much cos we don’t know ourselves. Our kid just asked if we fancied a bit of a road trip with the chance to see you three and Lulu again, and what with him never letting us go anywhere with him before, and him being a bit well, scary, we agreed – he made it more of an order than a request to be honest, and, well, here we are, and here you are,” and he grinned hopefully.
“Ooooooo kayyyyyy,” said Margot, “In that case, who are those other two Krushers who were here before? And don’t you dare say you don’t know, he’s your brother and they’re his doubles, so who are they?”
Dwayne took up the tale, “They’re Krusher,” he said, “Both of them are. There are three of them, they’re all our brothers, they’re triplets too, and all three of them are Krusher, depending on whose turn it is.”
The girls looked at each other as they digested this information. Len broke the silence, “Why does it seem that the more answers we get, the more questions we have,” she enquired.
“Things are definitely getting a bit weird,” said Con.
“That,” said Margot, “Is putting it mildly.”
“Krusher and Lulu will be back later,” said Shane, “We can tell them we met you three and ask them if they’ll let you in on their plans if you like, but we can’t promise anything.” He turned to Margot as she opened her mouth, “AND I don’t care who you scream for, there is nobody here who can possibly be as scary as our brother can be and that’s our last word! Meet us at the Auberge at 8 and we’ll let you know what Krusher says.”
And with that Wayne, Dwayne, and Shane turned on their heels and set off leaving the trips to run back to school as fast as they could.

Krusher and Mary-Lou were sitting on the veranda of the Auberge sipping cold drinks, beer for him and milk for her, and admiring the enormous diamond ring adorning Mary-Lou’s slender finger.
Wayne, Dwayne and Shane were also sitting at the table, explaining the arrangement they’d made with the trips and practically begging Krusher to speak nicely to them when they arrived.
Krusher looked at Lulu, “What do you think babe? Shall we let your little friends in on the story? Or shall we make them sweat a bit longer? It’s up to you.”
Lulu considered. After all, it was Len, Con and Margot who were responsible for Lulu existing at all, without them she’d still be plain boring old Mary-Lou and she would never have met Melvyn, or have the opportunity he was offering her now.
“I think we’ll tell them,” she said, “They won’t give us away and they like a good joke as much as anyone. Besides, I think they need to know to let them deal with Aunt Joey, she is going to be sooooo mad.”
With a smirk she sipped her milk and settled back comfortably to await the arrival of the girls.

At 8.15 that evening, Margot had just arrived at the Auberge, totally out of breath and swearing dire things on Wayne, Dwayne and Shane if she didn’t get some answers. Len and Con were respectively on prefect dormitory duty and covering for Margot with anyone who wanted her by lurking around with ready excuses and praying Matey would not enquire where she was. There was no way all three of them could escape so Margot had promised faithfully to report back to her sisters with any information she managed to get.
Lulu was waiting for her and poured her a large glass of the ubiquitous milk, before smiling brightly and saying, “I expect you’d like to know what Melvyn and I are up to?”
Margot nodded, too out of puff to speak yet, and sank back into a chair to get her breath back.
“Well,” began Lulu, “It’s like this… Melvyn wants to marry me, he says he fell for me in Blackpool, I’m the one he’s been looking for for years, and he reckons we could be just perfect together and both be good for each other. I told him what I said before, about having to marry a doctor, I told him when I said Goodbye in Blackpool that I’d probably never see him again, but he tracked me down, and once I’d heard what he had to tell me, I agree with him. We are perfect together and we’re going to be married as soon as we get back to England. Any questions so far?”
Margot gulped and said “Lots, let’s start with, who are the other two Krushers, how does Krusher know Papa, and what on Earth did he tell you to make you agree to marry him like this?”
A voice from behind Margot said, “Let me answer that first one for you, these are the other two Krushers, my identical brothers. May I introduce Aubrey Woodrow Mervyn de Hoghton and Ambrose Uriah Marvin de Hoghton, Merv and Marv for short.”
“Pleased to meet you,” said Margot faintly, as she wondered if it would be rude to write down the names so she didn’t forget.
“We’re also all Krusher,” said Merv, “There’s actually only one Master at Arms from the Blackpool Chapter, we take turns, depending on what the other two are doing. Luckily the rest of the Angels aren’t exactly bright so no one has clicked on yet. We don’t tend to go places together very much either, we just had to come here to help Melv persuade his Lulu he was telling the truth.”
“So, er, Algy Melvyn Krusher, was it you who was at university with Papa?” Margot collected her wits to ask.
“Nope, that was Merv, he actually is a doctor – well he’s a top surgeon these days, but when he was at uni we were all there. That’s how he got such good marks, he swatted for exams and we did the partying and distracted the other students,” “And the examiners,” interjected Marv with an evil leer, “and he got the highest marks ever,” finished Melvyn.
Margot looked bewildered so Lulu produced a hip flask from under the table and glugged a large dollop of schnapps into her milk. “Drink up Margot, then we can tell you the rest,” she giggled.
“You mean there’s more?” Margot said faintly.
“Oh, you ain’t heard nothing yet,” came the reply…

As Margot finished her milk and schnapps and wiped the milk moustache away Mary-Lou continued her tale. “Melvyn’s father is a Baronet, Sir Bernard de Hoghton, and their ancestral home is Hoghton Tower in Lancashire. One day the eldest son will inherit the title and the estate. Sir Bernard is most concerned that his son and heir lives ‘properly’, as befits a Baronet, after all the title has been in the family since the 16th century. With the Krushers being triplets, this has made things harder for Sir Bernard and easier for them.” Here she paused and grinned a wicked grin before continuing, “The boys were mixed up at birth and now even they don’t know which one is which,” “Yes we do” interjected Marv (well Margot thought it was Marv) “Sometimes they go away but I’m always right here” Mary-Lou ignored him. “This means that nobody except the boys actually knows for sure which one is Melvyn.”
“Can you tell the difference Lulu?” asked Margot.
“Of course” she said, then blushed, “Well I can pick out my Melvyn if they’re naked but that’s beside the point! The point is that the boys have decided between them that they can all be Sir Melvyn when the time comes, that lets each of them have a life and do their own thing, and lets all of them share the work of running the estate. They also share the money, and there’s ever such a lot.”
“Right,” said Margot, “But I still don’t see where Lulu fits into all this.”
Mary-Lou rolled her eyes, “Oh for Heavens sake Margot, I get to be Lady de Hoghton! Look, I’ll explain some more til you understand. After all there are the second de Hoghton triplets to think about in all this.” And she winked suggestively.

By now poor Margot’s head was reeling, both from the schnapps and from Mary-Lou’s tale. She made a determined effort to pay attention, and held her mug out for more schnapps figuring it might just help her concentrate and work out what, if anything, was in all this for her and her sisters.
Lulu glugged milk and alcohol into the proffered mug and continued explaining things. “I marry Melvyn, I can get round him not being the doctor because Merv is so if I need a doctor husband for a function or whatever then Merv can do it. I get to be Lady de Hoghton one day because Melvyn is the oldest son. I get to be a Hell’s Angels “Ol’ Lady” which has got to be exciting, and all I have to do is produce an heir which shouldn’t be a problem – I was talking to a lady on the tram in Blackpool, called Cryst and she reckons all it takes is a turkey baster and something or other I can get from Doctor Jack to slip in my milk so that’s easily taken care of. Other than that we all live the life of Riley.” She grinned happily at Margot and awaited her reaction.
“So, you marry your Melvyn and Papa helps you with the stuff for the milk and you have an heir, then you and Melvyn do the happily ever after bit, right?”
“But what happens when Merv and Marv want to get married?”
Lulu sniggered. “They’re gay darling, there’s no chance that will happen. And the beauty of our set up is, nobody need ever know, if either of them needs a visible wife, I’ll be her.” This last with a disregard for grammar that would have Miss Annersley reaching for the smelling salts.
Margot thought about all this for a while, absently refilling her mug with schnapps at the same time. “Good plan Lulu, now where do Wayne, Dwayne, and Shane come into it?”
“That’s up to you and Len and Con. Well, and Aunt Joey I suppose, I expect she’ll be keen to have you marry landed gentry, you could introduce them to her and see how it goes. I know! Get her to invite us all for tea tomorrow after school. Everyone is dying to know if Melvyn and I are really engaged so there won’t be a problem getting there, in fact I’ll phone myself and tell her I’d be honoured if she would host an engagement soiree for us, that should do the trick. Expect a message tomorrow sometime and act surprised!!”
Margot agreed and set off back to school, hiccoughing and weaving from tree to tree along the path, singing under her breath, “Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii stuck my finger in the woodpeckers hole…” What a lot she had to tell Len and Con when she got back.

Margot neared the Chalet and slowed to a creep. It was way past the time she should have been in bed. She stealthily approached the window of Miss Annersley’s study and peeped cautiously over the sill. She almost jumped out of her skin as she saw a beady grey eye peeping back!
“Mary Margaret Maynard! What on Earth are you doing out there at this time of night?”
Hilda opened the window and beckoned her in.
“Come in this way to avoid disturbing anyone. Now what have you got to say for yourself young lady?”
Margot gulped and hung her head, desperately trying to think what to say.
“I, erm, I, that is, I’ve been, er,” she trailed off as her alcohol sodden brain refused to co-operate.
“Have you been to see Mary-Lou?”
“Yes Aunty Hilda.”
Miss Annersley opened the drawer of her desk, extracted a bottle, and moved to the little cupboard in the corner that held her coffee making apparatus.
“Oh good,” she said, “You can tell me all about it, I’m dying to know what she’s up to, and to be perfectly frank, your mother is driving me mad, so anything you can tell me will be most helpful.” With that she pointed to a chair and Margot sat down gratefully.
“And another thing,” continued Hilda, “I don’t suppose there’s any news of Kevin is there?”
Margot gaped and tried to get her thoughts organised as Hilda busied herself with coffee, liberally lacing her own cup with brandy. What should she tell her? How much should she tell her?
“erm, nobody has mentioned Kevin Aunty Hilda. I can ask Krusher if you want?”
“I’ll think about it,” came the reply, “I’ll thank you to say nothing unless I ask you to.”
Margot agreed and then simply said that Mary-Lou was deeply in love, engaged, and planning to ask Joey to host a soiree to celebrate the engagement the next evening.
Hilda dismissed her to bed, saying “If you meet Matron tell her you’ve been here with me. Goodnight Margot.”
Margot fled to her cubicle resolving to get hold of Len and Con at the first opportunity and get their thoughts on the evenings events.
Hilda meanwhile decided that if the soiree took place, she would definitely be in attendance!

The next morning, Mary-Lou telephoned Freudesheim and asked Joey if she would please do her and Algy the honour of hosting a small soiree to celebrate their engagement. Name dropping shamelessly and intimating that Hilda already approved, she persuaded Joey to agree. That left OOAO with the rest of the day free to invite guests, go shopping for a frock, and spend three hours getting dressed for the party.
Meanwhile Joey was stirring the household into a frenzy of preparation for the evening, inviting guests, rooting through her wardrobe for a frock, and preparing to spend three hours getting ready to play the perfect hostess.
She telephoned the San and told Jack that no patient, under any circumstances, was to require his attention after 6 pm that day, and gave him a list of the other staff to invite, threatening him with dire consequences if any of them failed to appear on time, dressed to kill.
She then proceeded to telephone just about every one else on the Platz and invite them too.
Then she summoned the faithful Anna, and much discussion took place over nibbles suitable to feed both a Baronets heir and the great and the good of the Platz. With the food all arranged, Joey took herself off to the bathroom and, running the taps, dumped half a jar of bath salts in and prepared to soak away the stress. She had no idea being a formal hostess was so much effort, and totally missed the look of confusion on Anna’s face as she left for the kitchen with the list of required food to prepare.
By Mittagessen, Hilda had received calls from both OOAO and Joey inviting herself, Matey, Rosalie and “any of the other staff who’ve bought a new frock lately” to attend the party of the year. Joey had also demanded the presence of the triplets to ‘help with drinks and things’ and the girls, brought up to date by Margot over Fruhstuck had agreed to help out and were busy taking their velveteens to Miggi in the kitchen for pressing.
By 5.30 Anna was worn to a frazzle but was able to inform Joey that the table was beautifully laid with each and every dish on the list perfectly prepared.
Mary-Lou was bemoaning the fact that the Swiss shops just did not sell underwear to match her wonder bra and wondering if her bum looked big in her new dress.
Hilda, Matey, Rosalie and Nell were having a stiff brandy to brace themselves, and Jack was in his study doing likewise.
The triplets presented themselves to Joey in her bedroom looking very trig and smart in their beautifully ironed velveteens and announced themselves ready to help out in any way they could.
The scene was set and any minute now the guests would assemble to wish Mary-Lou and Algy happiness in their marriage…

By 7.30 the party was in full swing, the room was heaving with dozens of people chattering and drinking happily. Joey had just told the triplets to take the covers off the dainty plates of food so lovingly prepared by Anna over the course of the afternoon, and they were doing so with increasing amusement. Joey became aware of the muffled giggles and gasps and went to see what was so funny.
She looked down at the table, it was beautifully set, delicate china, sparkling crystal and silver, and linen and lace napkins made a lovely picture. The only thing amiss was the actual food. What on Earth had Anna done? Joey gaped in astonishment at her Sevres tureen, a wedding present from Jacks parents, which was full of what could only be described as virulent green ‘gunk’ reminiscent of the vegetable dye she had once coloured her head and face with.
“What is that stuff Mamma?” asked Con.
“And that,” chimed in Len, pointing at a plate covered in violet cubes on sticks which resembled nothing on Earth so much as leftovers from an operating theatre.
“And that!” said Margot, as she examined a large meat platter covered in shapeless brown lumps of what looked like old flannelette with what appeared to be frogs legs poking out of each one.
Joey looked a bit closer, gulped, and looked away. “I have no idea,” she whispered, “Run and fetch Anna quickly Len, there must be some mistake!”
Len fled to the kitchen and returned swiftly, accompanied by Anna, who looked none to pleased at the summons having finally managed to get herself a cup of coffee after 13 hours on the go that day.
“Frau Maynard, what then is the problem?” she asked, “The table looks beautiful nicht war? All day I work to make the food you ordered, these Lancashire delicacies for the Sir Hoggyton, yes, even though I have never heard of them, I look at the recipes, I think, I plan, I cook, and it is all good is it not?”
Joey looked at the table, then at Anna, then, with horrified realisation dawning in her eyes, back at the table. She took a deep breath and said, “Yes Anna, it’s all beautiful, we just wanted to tell you how lovely it all looks and how much we appreciate your efforts. That’s all.”
Anna heaved a long-suffering sigh and headed off back to her kitchen to reheat her coffee.
“Mamma?” the triplets looked inquiringly at their Mother. “So what is it all then?”
Joey hardly knew whether to laugh or cry. She pointed to the tureen, “That my darlings, is, I suspect, pease pudding.” Then the purple meaty lumps as they oozed malevolently, “And those are black pudding, I knew something was lost in the translation,” she sighed, “And those,” the scorched flannelette with frogs legs, “are toads in the hole.”
The triplets erupted into gales of laughter and clutched each other as everyone in the room turned to see what was making them gurgle so.
“Never mind Mamma,” Len managed to get out through her gasps, “At least Anna made the sandwiches and not you, so they should be edible, shouldn’t they?”
At that instant a hand appeared, holding one of Joeys china dinner plates, and a voice said, “Oh lovely, guacamole, aubergine and vol-au-vents, my favourites,” the plate was loaded almost to breaking point and Jack wandered off, munching happily.

Just then, clarion tones were heard throughout the room saying, “Don’t worry Uncle Jack, Melvyn’s Mother said to tell you that you’ll be quite safe if you come to the wedding. They fixed the suit of armour and the fountain, repolished the main banisters, picked the caviar out of the parquet with toothpicks, and the old Butler retired 7 years ago, so there’s no chance of a repeat performance of your party piece in the Towers.”
As silence descended Jack could be heard choking on a mouthful of ‘guacamole.’
The triplets gaped as their father turned a delicate shade of puce, then gaped again as Mary Lou’s voice continued, “Have you met Melvyn’s best man yet Uncle Jack? This is Kevin.”
“Pleased to meet you Doctor Maynard, I’m Doctor King,” as the one and only Kevin Cobra held out his hand to Jack to shake.
“Doctor!” came simultaneously from the triplets, Joey, and last but not least Hilda. Kevin turned towards her and their eyes locked across the crowded room….

Last edited by Rowena on Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:01 pm; edited 1 time in total


#2:  Author: DawnLocation: Leeds, West Yorks PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2006 9:51 pm

Fabulous to see this back - thankyou so much

And just what did Jack do at Hoghton Towers to cause so much destruction? Shocked Laughing


#3:  Author: RowenaLocation: NE England PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2006 10:02 pm

Dawn wrote:

And just what did Jack do at Hoghton Towers to cause so much destruction? Shocked Laughing

Some things are better left to the imagination!!! Laughing Cool Shocked


#4:  Author: LesleyLocation: Allhallows, Kent PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2006 10:07 pm

Oh, will it be a double wedding with Hilda and Cobra??? Laughing


#5:  Author: Alison HLocation: Manchester PostPosted: Thu Apr 06, 2006 11:24 pm

Oh good, Kevin's a doctor!

& please tell us what Jack got up to in the tower ... Laughing


#6:  Author: patmacLocation: Yorkshire England PostPosted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 7:56 am

It's really a bit early to be sitting at the computer giggling helplessly but this is so funny! Thank you and looking forward to more Razz


#7:  Author: AllyLocation: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 8:14 am

*giggles* My mind boggles at what Jack got up too!

I love Hoghton Towers, not least because my mum grew up about two miles from there *g*

Thanks Rowena!


#8:  Author: Cath V-PLocation: Newcastle NSW PostPosted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 12:20 pm

Doctor King - well that's Hilda set then!


#9:  Author: RowenaLocation: NE England PostPosted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 8:11 pm

I was just doing the next update and realised I need a book from the bookcase in the baby's room so it'll have to wait til tomorrow Sad


#10:  Author: francesnLocation: away with the faeries PostPosted: Fri Apr 07, 2006 8:53 pm

Nooo we need more now!

*prepares to wait patiently*


#11:  Author: RowenaLocation: NE England PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:00 pm

The next bit...

Jack shook Kevin’s hand cordially and asked, “What’s your area of expertise then? I’m a TB man myself, as you may know.”
Kevin smiled and replied, “Oh, I’m not a doctor of medicine, I’m a doctor of philosophy, metaphysics to be exact. I was granted my PhD recently; I submitted a thesis entitled ‘A Comparison of the World Pictures of Aristocles, Arouet, and Dzhugashvili considered through interaction of epistemology, teleology, and eschatology.’*
On hearing this, Hilda turned to Nell beside her and said quietly, “I think Plato would be pleased to be in the company of Voltaire, but each of them would shun Stalin”*
At her remark Kevin turned, and, looking at Hilda as though he had never seen such a vision, fell to his knees at her feet and declared, “No body has ever got that title so quickly before, I just knew there was something special about you from the moment we met – Hilda, will you marry me?”
Hilda’s eyes misted for a moment as she considered. Memories of a certain half term trip to Blackpool jostled with everything she would be giving up at the Chalet School if she married. Her decision took all of 4 seconds.
“Cobra, I thought you’d never ask.”
Kevin leapt to his feet and, clasping Hilda in his arms, they kissed passionately, as though unaware of their audience of thrilled and enthralled colleagues, neighbours, and pupils.
Joey turned to Mary-Lou, glared her best No1 Glare, and declared, “Mary Louise Trelawny, this is all your fault!”

* The dissertation title and Hilda's remark are Robert Heinlein on page 276 of the paperback of To Sail Beyond The Sunset.


#12:  Author: Alison HLocation: Manchester PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:22 pm

Kevin's certainly full of surprises!

I'm surprised it even took Hilda 4 seconds to decide Laughing .

Thanks Rowena.


#13:  Author: LesleyLocation: Allhallows, Kent PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:36 pm

Go Hilda! (And I love that book too!)

Thanks Rowena. Laughing


#14:  Author: FatimaLocation: Sunny Qatar PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 3:48 pm

Oh, what a shock! Thanks Rowena.


#15:  Author: JennieLocation: Cambridgeshire PostPosted: Sat Apr 08, 2006 4:01 pm

It's great to see more of this, thanks.


#16:  Author: Cath V-PLocation: Newcastle NSW PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:33 am

Oh, he's a proper doctor. Very Happy Well done Hilda!


#17:  Author: ChairLocation: Rochester, Kent PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 12:15 pm

Thanks, Rowena. I am very intrigued to know what exactly Jack did. I'm glad Kevin and Hilda have been reunited.


#18:  Author: RosyLocation: Gloucestershire-London-Aberystwyth PostPosted: Mon Apr 10, 2006 7:57 pm

*giggles quietly*



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