More Please ???
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| How things really were at the Chalet School http://www.the-cbb.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=8426 |
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| Author: | Naomila [ Fri Sep 17, 2010 11:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | How things really were at the Chalet School |
"I know what I want to be when I grow up," announced Chas proudly. "A drug dealer!" "Oh good," replied Joey. "We could do with a pharmacist in the family. Sometimes I think there are just too many doctors around." But then, at least Chas will firmly stick to it, thought Joey. Margot hasn't a clue, but I wonder what she'll be like in the future. 'Of course I'm not going to be a nun,' laughed Margot. 'There's no money in it. Remember Carla von Flugen who had a job as a waitress in Salzburg? She's earned enough in tips over the last few years to buy a Rolls Royce. I'm off to join her tomorrow.' 'A nun?' said Margot. 'God no! I'm going to run an escort service.' Once she'd say "I wondered why everyone was so surprised at me wanting to be a nun," said Margot frankly. "I didn't realise that you all thought I meant that sort - religion is hardly my thing, after all!" "Well, Margot, you just change your mind about these things too often," said an exasperated Len. "Ever since we came back from university, you've been changing your mind about your future, and this is just the holidays," She had remembered the tense scene earlier. 'So when are you going to join the convent, Margot?" Joey asked. "Never. I gave up on that idea long ago; I had a string of affairs at university, and I know you have to be a virgin to become a nun. The offers were so tempting!" Margot said wickedly. "There is more," said Len coming to join in. "I am not going to be a teacher like everyone expects me to be. I am going to be a..." "A what?!" That was another story as Kipling would say! But getting back to Chas and his plans for the future. Jack was called and he answered. Joey wasn't bothered, after all, he was often called by many people. Jack put the phone down and turned to Joey and said "Bad news I'm afraid, Charles is being expelled for drug dealing" "What!!!!" shrieked Joey, standing up rapidly. "No way! Oh well, the CS isn't likely to be infected by drugs, even if new girls like them," Jack wasn't so sure, but he knew about Joey's remark. "A problem new girl?" asked Joey, frowning slightly. "No, I don't think I do want her to tea, after the last time one of them left weed in the nursery. Anyway, I'm really struggling with the next chapter of my new book, and I don't think I can see anyone for at least a month." But then, thought Jack, the CS is definitely going to have a drugs problem sooner or later. |
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| Author: | ChubbyMonkey [ Sun Sep 19, 2010 4:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Ooh, I'm hoping that there's more of this, it looks good! Thankyou. |
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| Author: | shazwales [ Sun Sep 19, 2010 4:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| More Please ???
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| Author: | Abi [ Sun Sep 19, 2010 9:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Glad you've started posting this! (though please could we have a colour that's slightly easier to read than yellow for the quotes, please?  )
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| Author: | Myth Tree [ Mon Sep 20, 2010 7:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Echos Abi. A bright start (but the yellow makes it tricky to read). |
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| Author: | Fiona Mc [ Mon Sep 20, 2010 12:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Thanks, that was really good 
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| Author: | Naomila [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 8:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
When one of the Juniors wanted help from Mary-Lou, she found her behind the games shed, snogging Verity-Anne. The pair were worried about something, it was evident on their faces. The Junior stared. Then Mary-Lou saw the Junior with the expression of worriedness. "Go and pester someone else," said Mary-Lou. "I really can't be bothered with your problems right now." The Junior started to leave, but Mary-Lou stopped her. "Ask for me after Abendessen in our common-room and don't tell a soul of this," she said, and the Junior scurried off. But when she did go to the common room, she was shocked. "Where's Mary Lou?" "Oh haven't you heard? They found Ecstasy and cannabis under her underwear and she's been hauled off to the nick....." The Junior was very surprised, so decided to hunt up Len Maynard instead. "Go and pester someone else," said Len. "I really can't be bothered with your problems right now." The Junior vanished to her own common-room, to endure all the glares sent in her direction. Really, was there no help from the nicest elders. Mary-Lou had actually been hauled to the San, and was asked how she got hold of the drugs. She recounted some of the things some of the teachers were saying. "...and this is the sixth form garden, as you can see the girls are growing a wonderful crop of cannabis, it helps pay for all the scholarship girls" "None of the girls actually studies chemistry, so we converted the labs to full-scale production of cocaine. The stuff's brought into England in their trunks." The staff announced, "To improve class performance, from now on, Kaffee und Kuchen has been changed to Kokain und Kuchen." "That didn't go well, and they stopped after one day of it," Mary-Lou stated nervously. "Now girls", said Miss Everett "I've prepared the greenhouses, and put the heating on, so now all you need to do is sow the cannabis seed as I showed you recently" "But how did you get hold of Ecstasy?" asked Jack, as Jem entered the room. "Mary-Lou, your health screening results came back. You tested positive for crack and PCP." But then - "I'm sorry," said Jem. "I was wrong." It transpired those results were for someone else. Mary-Lou hadn't had any drugs at all in her test. But Mary-Lou was transfixed that a doctor could admit to being wrong. "Doctors aren't always right you know" said Jem. "But I would still like to know how you got Ecstasy," said Jack. Mary-Lou eventually managed to tell the doctors how she'd disguised herself as a policeman, and found a druggies flat. Calling 'Hands up- this is a drug raid!" she managed to smuggle some of the ecstasy, and the druggie had given the rest of it to her. "I was going to sell it so I could contribute to one of the scholarships," Mary-Lou finished. They let her go back to the school, very reluctantly. "Although I hope they don't keep her," said Jack to Joey later. "Chas was expelled," Then - 'Good grief, Joey,' exclaimed Jack. 'What on earth have you been up to?' 'I know,' Joey looked puzzled. 'It's weird, isn't it? I had a headache and mistook one of your little blue pills for an aspirin.' Jack stared in astonishment (and no little envy) at his wife's 4' long plaits, freed from their earphones and standing up tall and proud. 'Did you hear the new doctor, Jack?' Joey was ecstatic after the San's fundraising cocktail party. 'He said I look far too young to have so many children.' 'Yeah, right,' Jack sighed. The new doctor, he reflected, didn't have to watch in horror while Joey went through her nightly bedtime routine: 1) remove her wig (and have a good scratch); 2) take out her false teeth and flash a gummy grin at him; 3) unscrew her wooden leg; 4) fiddle disgustingly with her glass eye till it came out with a squelch; 5) remove the chicken fillets from her bra (at which point Jack always had to avert his eyes); 6) squeeze herself protestingly out of her Trinny & Susannah Magic Knickers. "You only really look young because of the things you do to make yourself look prettier," "That wasn't me, that was Miss Annersley," Joey said. "I overheard a conversation of yours," "Is it true?" Samaris whispered to Sam. "Is what true?" Sam whispered back. "That Miss Annersley is having sex with Jack Maynard?" "Yes, it is very true," said the stern voice of Jack Maynard himself coming up behind them, arm in arm with the head. "Oh and we have a three some with Joey when she is not busy!" "But what about Mary-Lou?" asked Joey, as Jack blushed deeply. "Oh, the school found some drugs in her underwear drawer and she was at the San for a screening. But Chas is being expelled for drug-dealing, and that was what Mary-Lou intended, so why isn't she being expelled?" "No idea, Jack. But if Len gets too friendly with that Reg Entwhistle I can see what's likely to happen. Len, was expelled from the Chalet School much to her triplet sisters' horror for smoking pot out of the bedroom window. Matey, doing her rounds had smelt a strange smell, and caught her in the act. When quizzed, Len admitted that they grew it in the garden of Reg's chalet, and his frequent visits, meant he could sneak her some! "I'm afraid, Len, that we're going to have to ask your parents to take you away." Miss Annersley would say," "Chas, you must promise not to do that kind of drug dealing ever again, you understand me? You can become a pharmacist, but not a trader in illegal substances," Joey said to her son a short while later. Chas looked at the floor and blushed wildly, but promised anyway, and decided he would become a pharmacist. The triplets were talking with each other. Len said to her sisters "Have you noticed? Mother is growing up." "Not really, no. But then, no-one's told her the news I heard recently. "Well, who is going to break the news to Joey that all of Josephine M. Bettany's books have been banned from British children's libraries because of the appalling grammatical constructions to be found in them?" That's what Frieda and Marie said, anyway," Margot said. "Who is going to tell mother that her books have been banned from every school in England, because the schools didn't like them." Con looked at her sisters. "Oh, get one of the adopted kids to do it," said Len. 'ITS NOT FAIR!!!!!' Margot yelled, her devil coming to the fore. "Just because we have a big house, why does Mama keep on insisting on having more babies, and adopting every stray that comes by!' Len nodded in agreement. "You are right,time to call a family conference. Mama has just adopted quads, even though we are leaving for universitys soon, that still leaves her with such alot; and Dad is getting no say in it at all." Con gurgled. "Maybe we should put a sign on the front door saying ' All welcome, especially babies, to stay for good. Are we really that rich?" "Not really, but I would love to do that," Margot said. Con thought it was the best time to tell her. 'Margot, I'm sorry,' admitted Con sheepishly. 'All these years, the voice you thought was your devil was just me, whispering in your ear when you were looking the other way and then looking dozy so you wouldn't suspect!' "What, really?" asked Margot, amazed. "Oh well," "What's the point in any of us working hard?" Len asked. "If we go to university and get degrees and jobs we'll only end up packing it all in to get married and have hundreds of kids. Look at Julie Lucy - she could have spent that extra year she had at school out drinking and partying instead." "What, really?" asked Margot, now thunderstruck. "Oh well," |
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| Author: | Alison H [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 9:32 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
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| Author: | emma t [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 9:57 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Love it!Any more ?
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| Author: | Abi [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 10:35 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Splendid!
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| Author: | Elle [ Fri Sep 24, 2010 10:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Very funny! |
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| Author: | Myth Tree [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 8:25 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Awesome!
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| Author: | cal562301 [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 9:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
This is wonderful, Naomila. Thanks. |
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| Author: | ChubbyMonkey [ Sat Sep 25, 2010 6:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| Thankyou!
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| Author: | Naomila [ Fri Oct 01, 2010 10:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
The new girls were called Mary, Kate, Michelle, Edith, Yvette, Maria, Mimi, Dora, Susan, Claudia, Ashley, Helga, One, Two, Three, Martha, Eliza, George, Anne, Julia, Jane, Joan, Jean, Darrell, Sally, Alicia, Betty, Clara, Mona, Twinkle and Lisa. There were strange rumours about these girls. Jane, Jean and Joan Maynard were exactly the same, and always confused the mistresses until the mistresses were sticking straw in their hair. "Apparently Miss Annersley lost her temper with Mary," said Len. "I was in the office at the time. Miss Annersley lost her temper with the self-obsessed new girl, and shook her until the girl didn't know which way was left and which way was right. But I never expected Miss Annersley to explode like that," Mary-Lou said. "How come you were in the office at that time?" asked Con. "And how come I saw you snogging Verity-Anne behind the games shed before the drugs thing arose?" Mary-Lou reddened. "I was in the office because of the drugs thing. Oh, and none of you spread gossip about that snogging business. Verity-Anne is feeling a bit lovestricken for a doctor, as usual, so I kinda… told her to forget I was me, so to speak, and to pretend I was the same doctor. She felt a lot better after that. Do not repeat to anyone or you will be shot," "What, really?" said Margot, stunned. "Oh well," "What else can you say about new girls, Mary-Lou?" asked Con. "All the new girls were bullied until there were more new girls. But now they aren't, not like that, anyhow. "Innit brav, ya killed it," said the new girl to Matron. This was Kate, and she doesn't seem intimidated by Matron at all. “You see dear, the mistresses have made friends with the doctors at the san and well, we don’t want any accidents,” Miss Annersley said to the new girl who had been shocked by the box of condoms in the first aid kit. That must have been Michelle, she's always asking questions, never anything else," "What, really?" repeated Margot. "Oh well," ""Yes, the prospectus mentioned remembering the day of the week," replied the new girl. "And it promised that we could only have cold baths - I got mother to ring the head and insist on warm, bubbly ones for myself. She said I may do so." Edith is a big fuss about everything, the b****," "What, really? Oh well," Mary-Lou glared at her. "Who was the one in prayers?" Con asked. "The one that called you a God-botherer," Fed up with Mary-Lou's incessant whispers about how much she was meant to put in the San collection, the meaning of the Head Girl's reading and praise for the Chalet School prayers system, the new girl snapped. Her ensuing "Stop being such a God-Botherer!" at a slightly louder pitch than she intended, caused the pianist to falter, Hall to fall silent and Miss Annersley, along with some of the more devout girls, to treat them to a lavish fainting display. "Oh, that was Clara. 'My mother is an Anglican bishop,' remarked the new girl, causing the entire school, staff and all, to swoon in horror. That's her. "Well, *my* father's a Cardinal," snapped back the other new girl "and *we* don't recognise Anglican Orders." That would have been Mimi. Then Twinkle said "And I'm an atheist," chirped a third, "Daddy says you're all delusional but the Chalet School's Oxbridge record is so good I have to come here." The nerve," "What, really? Oh well," "Margot, Shut up," said Len. "There's an oddball in our class, Martha. 'I simply love fluffy little kittens and flowers and lovely hymns,' announced the new girl, whereupon the entire staff heaved a sigh of relief. "On toast," she added. Now that is weird!" "Not as weird as Mona. She calls herself "Moony," often declares she hates the full moon and does the strangest things when it is full moon. "The moons come out and it's full? Oh God!" and the new girl sped out of the school grounds into a forest nearby, stripping as she went. That is just plain weird," Mary-Lou said. "What, really? Oh well," "Margot, repeat that again and I'll stick your hockey stick up your backside," Len said, remembering the mornings incident. Len's eyes widened in shock as she saw exactly what Margot was doing with her hockey stick... "We do get them!" Mary-Lou said. |
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| Author: | Abi [ Fri Oct 01, 2010 11:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| Love Margot!
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| Author: | janetbrown23 [ Sat Oct 02, 2010 10:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Sheer genius Naomilla. |
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| Author: | ChubbyMonkey [ Sat Oct 02, 2010 11:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| Fantastic!
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| Author: | Finn [ Fri Oct 08, 2010 11:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Naomila wrote: 'Did
you hear the new doctor, Jack?' Joey was ecstatic after the San's
fundraising cocktail party. 'He said I look far too young to have so
many children.' 'Yeah, right,' Jack sighed. The new doctor, he reflected, didn't have to watch in horror while Joey went through her nightly bedtime routine: 1) remove her wig (and have a good scratch); 2) take out her false teeth and flash a gummy grin at him; 3) unscrew her wooden leg; 4) fiddle disgustingly with her glass eye till it came out with a squelch; 5) remove the chicken fillets from her bra (at which point Jack always had to avert his eyes); 6) squeeze herself protestingly out of her Trinny & Susannah Magic Knickers. Oh God! There's an early-modern broadside ballad about that! Argh where's the link...it's in the Roxburghe collection. It's called "The Husband Who Met His Match", and I don't have it with me to quote from it! But it has an old woman taking off her wig, taking out her false eye, removing her wooden leg and then giving her new husband the keys to her money chest. It's a great ballad! Sorry. Old dissertation topics die hard. |
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| Author: | ivohenry [ Fri Oct 08, 2010 11:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
And there's this - After the ball was over Nellie took out her glass eye Put her false teeth in water Corked up her bottle of dye Put her false leg in the corner Hung up her wig on the door And all that is left goes to bye byes After the ball |
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| Author: | Naomila [ Sat Oct 16, 2010 8:46 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Plato smiled as he looked at his class, he had been fed up with being told to keep the noise down because of exams happening in the next classroom so today he decided to get his own back. "Today class I will be teaching you how to make a vuvuzela work." He laughed as he took out a vuvuzela. The girls wished to do this ever since the devil appeared in Upper IVbs classroom, while an angel appeared in the prefects room. It was very good for the upcoming event. "There will be no country dancing this evening," Miss Annersley announced. "We've set up big screens in the hall so that we can all watch the World Cup final. Mary-Lou will be handing out the vuvuzelas and Vi will be passing round the beers." Most of the girls hated this, and you could hear a lot of smashing of glasses – the girls hated beer too, and rebelled by also breaking the vuvuzelas so the mistresses could see their point. They had a snack in the half-time slot, but many girls had cheered up; The delights of all the girls were: Doughnuts fried in cod-liver oil, Sulphur cakes, Castor oil and slugs, and the kitchen staff decided to give them those instead of the normalities. |
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| Author: | ChubbyMonkey [ Sat Oct 16, 2010 8:51 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| A jolly good time was had by all! Thankyou! |
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| Author: | janetbrown23 [ Sat Oct 16, 2010 9:13 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
I am amazed at the way you weave this together Naomilla, It's wonderful |
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| Author: | Naomila [ Sat Nov 13, 2010 11:20 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Con! What on earth are you doing?! And... Reg?!" "Sorry Mamma - I-I think I was sleepwalking again. Reg woke me up and was just helping me back home." "Oh my poor girl! And you've clearly been walking into some bushes or undergrowth - why your hair is terribly messy and your pyjamas are missing a button... Con? Why are you blushing dear?" Con had had a wonderful evening and half-night, and enjoyed it immensely, but sneaking back to school was hard. She was glad to have Reg there with her, but she was well equipped with a story in case anyone saw them. "Let me get you into the warm," Joey said sympathetically. "You see Len," said Hilda impressively, "it's not just whether you can bear to darn Reg's socks for the rest of your, but rather, do you fancy the pants off him?" It was the day after the "sleepwalking" incident, and Miss Annersley wanted to tell Len marriage isn't that glamorous. Len loathed Reg with all her heart and wished that he would stop following her like a love-sick puppy making gooey-eyes at her whenever she did not fall into line! "I'd sooner have to drink all the alcohol in the world!" said Len, who was trying to get out of the engagement desperately. 'Len, you do realise that 'sock-darning' is just a metaphor, don't you?' said Miss Annersley carefully, wishing Joey would have a few words about the birds and bees with her eldest. "Whatever, I'm so not gonna marry him, ever, so likes, why should I learn all that stuff?" Unknown to her, Len wasn't the only person Reg had "loved". 'Sharlie Andrews has at last stopped those bilious attacks,' smiled Matey as she watched the young mistress waddle across the Speisesaal, her hand held wearily at her back. 'And thank goodness she's putting on weight; she was such a skinnygallee until she made friends with Dr Entwistle.' But Reg had made more steps with Len. "No daughter of mine is going to marry a doctor!" Joey snarled, glaring at Len's handsome young would-be suitor. "Get out of my house." "Reg, if you're interested in Len then why don't you just tell her so, instead of coming round here asking me if I'd mind you "speaking" to her three years down the line and telling me all about your finances?" Jack asked exasperatedly. "We're not in a Jane Austen novel, for heaven's sake." "I take it we're engaged?" Reg asked. "What - no!" Len replied, shocked. "I mean, you're OK, Reg, but I'm not particularly interested in men, if you catch my drift." Reg sighed, and glanced across at Con. "I take it we're engaged, then?" he asked hopefully. He was insistent on getting one of the triplets, anyhow. But Len knew what would happen if Reg married her: "I never thought I'd say this" Margot Maynard, Headmistress of the Chalet School, said to her secretary and triplet sister, Len, "but I think Mama and Reg make a much better couple than you and he ever would have done! Not to mention how happy Papa has made Mr Denny! Divorce rules!" "Reg what do you mean you're engaged to Len" Sharlie asked "I thought we had a future together" Reg wanted a young fresh triplet, not an aged teacher who used to be bilious. " When I get my hands on Reg Entwistle, I'll have his guts for garters" Matron burst into the study and slammed the door "You heard about the engagement then" Hilda said "Indeed I have. He's a two timing little *******. Sharlie's in her room, crying her eyes out because he told her she was the one. Rosemary's in the staffroom crying her eyes out because she thought she was the one. Joan's hit the Baileys and is threatening to go and sort him out. Len is making a big mistake in my opinion" "Matron, I have news for you. Len doesn't want to marry Reg at all, she's being pressurized into this engagement. She said, "I'd sooner have to drink all the alcohol in the world!" when it came to marriage talk. And we all know Len's opinion of alcohol," Hilda said. Len had started to tell Reg of how she really felt. "Reg, I'd rather marry Gaudenz than you," Len said icily, and walked away. 'Take it from me, Len,' said Joan Baker, to whom all the other girls tended to take their man troubles. 'That Reg is a pillock.' "Oh for heaven's sake, Reg, the fact that I've seen you in bed doesn't mean that we're engaged," Len said irritably. "In fact, the sight's put me off the idea completely." "Reg is missing? Thank goodness!" said Len. "I don't know what it is about me that inspires such great obsessions," Len said in bemusement. "First Jack Lambert and now Reg Entwistle. It's not as if I've got a very interesting personality, after all." But then the finale of the engagement came. Hilda conceded that Joan Baker had a point about the need for male partners at Chalet School dances, and invited a selection of approved doctors over from the San the following Saturday. The event was marred by Reg Entwistle starting a brawl with a handsome anaesthetist whom he'd seen waltzing with Len Maynard, but the incident did have the happy effect of making Len realise what an unpleasant character Reg was and refusing ever to have anything to do with him again. In fact, Len had started to be attracted to someone else around. Matron cheerfully ignored the fact that all the juniors dormitories were a mess, and let them get away with it. The juniors were amazed by the change in her! What had caused this change? was the question on everyone's minds. Matey, who knew everything and was well aware of the puzzlement of the girls, chuckled to herself as she thought of the suprise she would give them when she told the whole school that she was engaged to be married - to Gaudenz! Gaudenz chuckled as he thought of the scene to come, when he introduced Matey to his other 'fiancée'. Len wasn't sure about this whole polygamy thing, especially when Gaudenz's other wife was matey. But, she reasoned, it still couldn't possibly be as bad as marrying Reg. Len was glad she didn't have to marry Reg anymore, and had got a slight inkling that she knew who she wanted. The trouble was this and a scene she witnessed earlier. "Oh, for heaven's sake," sighed Miss Annersley as, looking out of the window, she saw a group of giggling Fifth Formers trailing after the ruggedly handsome Gaudenz. But then, Gaudenz had picked her over them. But Rosalie had heard something interesting last night. "Ah, Len," said Miss Annersley over the telephone. "I was wondering whether you knew where Reg was? Len? Why are you giggling like that? Who's that I can hear? Are you hurt? Len, is that Gaudenz's voice?" But then one day she found out she was pregnant. "What do you mean, you're not going to marry Reg" Joey said "You're five months pregnant" Helena shrugged " It's not his" she said. "So what are you going to do?" Joey asked "What about the father, will he marry you?" "No idea" Helena said "I haven't told him yet and I'm not sure I want to get married anyway" "Who is the father, then?" Joey asked. "Gaudenz," replied Len. "Well, you're already engaged," "One tiny problem. He's engaged to Matey as well," "Well, let's hope we don't have to go on Jeremy Kyle or Trisha about this," Joey said. "Not like Daphne," Len laughed. She remembered what had happened. "Guess what Sybil?" said Daphne "no-relation" Russell, "I've just appeared on "Who Do You Think You Are" and I am related to you." It was only after an appearance on Jeremy Kyle and a paternity test that Daphne Russell was able to shed the "no relation" addition to her name. And get a guaranteed prefectship. And they'd only agreed to do the show because of all the arguments around Daphne and the other Russells. The entire Maynard Clan spent the summer with their feet up watching television. Jeremy Kyle was the highpoint of their day. But then, the next term… "Mary-Lou! You're busy" gasped a scandalised Joey, "how did that happen?" "Oh for heaven's sake Joey, you really ought to know after eleven kids" said Mary-Lou, "by the way it's normally known as being pregnant." "So who's the father?" asked Joey. Mary-Lou blushed. She wished she hadn't sent that text. Hello Reg, it's Mary Lou. I need to see you as soon as possible. My period's late..... "Reg," whispered Mary-Lou, who was miserable on her reaction to the pregnancy. Help! Help! HELP!" Yelled Mary-Lou. "I really don't know what to do! Oh help!" For as one, the Gang decided that she was not going to be their leader. All that confidence in being able to sort people's troubles out was a farse. In fact, deep inside, Mary-Lou was putting on a preformance, and was a quivering wreck. "Then you must marry him. How come everyone's getting busy? Len, Con, you, Anna, Rosli, and it was only yesterday I found a baby on my doorstep," Mary-Lou avoided her eyes. The new girl was pregnant, although no-one knew until the birth. As everyone thought, "She's seriously got weight problems," until a load of stomach-aches and gave birth to a girl, who was left on Joeys doorstep. "Right," Mary-Lou said. She did not know anything about Mary-Lous habit of eavesdropping. She had heard about Anna and Rosli. "Hilda, Anna and Rosli are to be busy soon, what on earth am I to do?" wailed Joey. "So what has been happening with Anna and Rosli, then?" "Oh, they're just getting into men, but I don't know what they're doing with them except gambling," Joey said. "What?" Mary-Lou said, as Jack walked in. " It was only when Joey discovered Cecil's first word was 'blackjack' that the Maynards realised Anna and Rosli had been operating a covert gambling den on the Platz using the children's many walks as a disguise for their operation." Jack said. "Jack, I've got Chas back into his school. His record has been wiped clean totally and he's promised not to do it again," "That's fantastic news! How did you do it?" "Oh, the usual. Blackmail, sex, incriminating photos, 15 free copies of my anthology of poems," |
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| Author: | whitequeen [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:09 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
ha ha, a brilliant saga!
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| Author: | ChubbyMonkey [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 3:39 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Good grief, suddenly the Platz looks like an interesting place to live! Thankyou!
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| Author: | Jenefer [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 5:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Love it |
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| Author: | Abi [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 8:23 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
| Excellent!
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| Author: | emma t [ Sun Nov 14, 2010 8:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Love it Any more?
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| Author: | shazwales [ Wed Nov 17, 2010 8:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Brilliant
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| Author: | Lydia B [ Mon Nov 22, 2010 8:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: How things really were at the Chalet School |
Thi is fantastic.
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