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#1: Vengeance is Mine (short and complete) Author: MaryR, Location: Cheshire

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 9:37 pm
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This very silly short piece just unrolled in front of my eyes one morning as I woke up. When she read it, a friend did ask me what I was on. Shocked

Vengeance is Mine

As she got out of her car at the San to visit a school pupil early one afternoon in January, Hilda Annersley, the dignified and stately Headmistress of the Chalet School, slipped and fell on the hard-packed snow, banging her head sharply on the wheel arch. She lay there undetected for so long that her body gradually froze, her heartbeat slowing right down to give the impression of death.

Her body was finally discovered by two visiting professors and carried inside, where a fractured skull was diagnosed. But after Joey appeared on the scene and had a few words with Jack, it was decided to keep Hilda in a frozen state of suspended animation. Joey, after all, could twist Jack round her little finger with ease, always had and always would.

Some hours later, searching anxiously for her friend, Nell Wilson, Headmistress Of St Mildred’s, also slipped and fell, in the exact same spot and suffering the exact same injury. She also suffered the exact same treatment as Hilda - suspended animation and placed on a cold slab in a freezing room. “Strike two,” mumbled Joey to herself as she reclined against her lime green cushions on her lime green settee in her lime green Salon.

It was strike three when the same thing happened a third time – to Matron Lloyd, come in search of her friends. Joey hugged those cushions to her chest and thought of all the times she had been bested, or dosed, by one of those three authoritarian figures in her life. Now see what would happen to her sister’s precious school, without its foundation stones!

Her sister, of course, was out of reach at the moment, as indeed was Jem, unfortunately. Otherwise he would have been the very first to go – always playing the heavy-handed father. Now who else was there, she wondered idly? Jeanne de Lachennais, maybe……though perhaps she ought to wait a day or two, or suspicions might be aroused.

Joey, however, had reckoned without her old adversaries. Lying there in suspended animation, Hilda’s iron will suddenly kicked in. The crack in her skull mended itself in obedience to that formidable inner strength, and she regained consciousness. Her eyes snapping open, the ice encasing her body shattered into a million tiny icicles that flew hither and thither, making mellow music as they fell to the floor. Her heart beat began to speed up, warming her limbs, and finally she was able to slip down from the concrete slab.

She leaned over Nell’s body. Placing her finger on Nell’s forehead she communed silently with her closest friend. “Use that physical strength of yours, my dear. Or better yet, that natural belligerence that takes no prisoners.”

She waited patiently, and felt the snap as Nell’s skull mended, felt another snap as eyelids opened and grim, grey eyes looked into hers. She moved away as the ice round Nell shattered, the jagged pieces thudding to the floor like cannonballs. Death to the perpetrator, thought Hilda to herself.

After a look that spoke volumes, they moved to Matron and leaned over her body. They each placed a finger on her forehead. “Come on, Gwynneth, less of the spineless jellyfish. Use that sharpness and impatience of yours that make us all jump to do your bidding.” They did not have long to wait. Matey’s skull must have scurried in hasty obedience, for almost instantly the ice around her was cracking and they had to jump smartly out of the way as it shot everywhere, hard little bullets aiming for doors and walls.

“Typical!” muttered Nell. “Pull no punches! Hit where it hurts, why don’t you, Gwynneth?”

They stood in that cold, silent room and stared at each other. “Joey!” they cried in unison. Without another word, they marched out of the San in their white hospital gowns and bare feet, Hilda stalking ahead, an avenging fury. They searched the car park until they found a car with keys still in the ignition. Purloining it without compunction, Hilda calmly got in and took off so sharply and swiftly they were pressed back into their seats with the force.

Nell eyed her thoughtfully and then remarked with glee, “The proverbial bat out of Hell! Not your usual style at all, my dear! Anger? Tut, tut!”

Hilda stared straight ahead grimly, making no reply. Arriving at Freudesheim, they strode into Joey’s Salon to find her gorging herself on cream cakes, a satisfied smirk on her green-tinted lips. The next instant, a half-eaten cream cake bit the dust, trampled underfoot, and the three friends carried her, kicking and screaming, into the utility room, where stood an enormous lime green chest freezer.

Hilda silently opened the lid and emptied the contents on to the floor. Then she and the other two laid the struggling Joey on the bottom of the freezer, and threw on top of her all her precious cartons of lime green ice cream, which she ate in vast quantities at all hours of the day and night. Legs swinging, now smiling broadly at each other, they sat on the lid to prevent Joey escaping, waiting for the cries for help to die away.

Hilda brushed her hands together to remove the particles of ice and smiled coldly, her eyes grey and grim.

“Anger, Nell? Not at all, my dear! Justice – without any possibility of mercy!”

#2: Author: Katya, Location: Mostly Bradford

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 9:46 pm
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Whatever you were on, please can I have some?! Laughing

Brilliant - love it, especially the lime green chest freezer, not to mention the mental image I now have of Hilda stalking ahead of the other two wearing one of those hospital gowns that is open at the back Shocked

Thank you for making me laugh! Wink

#3: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 10:00 pm
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Me too! I'm sure I need it to get through orientation tomorrow.

That was fantastic fun Mary! I knew that Hilda wouldn't be left there like that! Poor Joey, but she deserved it, maniac that she was! Laughing

#4: Author: Alison H, Location: Manchester

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 10:38 pm
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I love the lime green freezer Laughing

#5: Author: Cath V-P, Location: Newcastle NSW

Posted: Thu Sep 21, 2006 11:53 pm
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Lime-green ice-cream, from a lime-green freezer?! Laughing

Echoes query of the friend! Laughing

#6: Author: Elder in Ontario, Location: Ontario, Canada

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 12:55 am
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Oh dear, *what* a picture - I've read it through twice and I'm still laughing.

Thanks, Mary - that was a hoot!

#7: Author: Identity Hunt, Location: UK

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 3:01 am
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Well, it`s a good thing it`s too early for my early morning cup of tea, Mary, or my keyboard would have been flooded Laughing

I love it

#8: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 5:19 am
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Love it - Mary, whatever you were taking - may I have some too? Laughing

#9: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 7:51 am
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Whatever you're on - patent it quick. You'll make your fortune.

Laughing

#10: Author: Miranda, Location: Perth, Western Australia

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 12:03 pm
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My final mental picture was of the three women in their hospital gowns and bare feet, with bits of ice still stuck in their hair (which is of course windblown from the car ride), sitting on the top of a lime green freezer as it shakes and calls for help.

Brilliant!!

PS - Nell would be just like Jack Frost wouldn't she? With her white hair and ice crystals?

#11: Author: Liane, Location: Manchester

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 7:13 pm
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That was fantastic Mary,thank you.

#12: Author: Elle, Location: Peterborough

Posted: Fri Sep 22, 2006 11:00 pm
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Fantasitc! Brilliant! Super! Love it!

#13: Author: Alice, Location: London, England

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 8:20 am
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Wonderful! Thanks Mary.

#14: Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England

Posted: Sat Sep 23, 2006 7:05 pm
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Laughing

Love the ice cream and the pictures this creats.
Laughing

#15: Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire

Posted: Sun Sep 24, 2006 2:19 pm
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Fantastic, mary. Please share the recipe.

#16: Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US

Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 4:30 am
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What a picture!

*splutters*

#17: Author: MaryR, Location: Cheshire

Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 3:52 pm
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Jennie wrote:

Fantastic, Mary. Please share the recipe.

Jennie, I don't think my husband would be too happy if I shared his blackcurrant wine recipe with you all. Laughing

But thank you for appreciating the results, barmy as they may be.

#18: Author: Clare, Location: Liverpool

Posted: Wed Sep 27, 2006 6:07 pm
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Mary that's fab! Just what I needed after a long day battling with kids.

#19: Author: KathrynW, Location: London

Posted: Sat Sep 30, 2006 9:50 am
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Thank you Mary, that was hilarious Laughing

#20: Author: leahbelle, Location: Kilmarnock

Posted: Sat Sep 30, 2006 4:46 pm
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Brilliant, Mary! Thanks Laughing

#21: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Thu Oct 05, 2006 2:16 am
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Laughing

Thanks Mary

#22: Author: CatherineS, Location: Smalltown, West of Scotland

Posted: Tue Nov 07, 2006 3:24 pm
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That was brilliant, Mary. I love it. You have a great pithy writing style.

#23: Author: wheelchairprincess, Location: Oxfordshire, UK

Posted: Wed Nov 08, 2006 1:10 am
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Laughing

ROFLMAO!!

This. Is. Brilliant!

But what happened next?! I think you need to write us another drabble like this Mary (or lots more ND, either is good!!)

#24: Author: Cath V-P, Location: Newcastle NSW

Posted: Thu Nov 09, 2006 12:07 am
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Now that it's been mentioned (thank you wheelchairprincess!), some more would be good... Wink

#25: Author: MaryR, Location: Cheshire

Posted: Fri Nov 10, 2006 2:52 pm
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wheelchairprincess wrote:

But what happened next?! I think you need to write us another drabble like this Mary (or lots more ND, either is good!!)

I'm afraid it will have to be ND, wheelchairprincess, as no more of this scene was unfolded to me - I guess you'll have to use your own imaginations. Twisted Evil

And of course, there is Revenge, as opposed to Vengeance, to be completed some day soon! I've left that one unfinished for far too long! Laughing

#26: Author: Katya, Location: Mostly Bradford

Posted: Wed Nov 15, 2006 1:43 am
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I'm with those two - if you should happen to have any more bizarre dreams involving lime green freezers or the like, do share! Wink

#27: Author: calico, Location: Wellington, New Zealand

Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 11:05 pm
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Wonderful Mary!!
I loved it.
Thank you

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