The CBB :: View topic - The Last Prospective Parent Interview

#1: The Last Prospective Parent Interview Author: CBB Secret Santa,

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 9:47 pm

Hilda's smile remained fixed in place till the door shut firmly behind the penultimate set of prospective parents.
"One more to go," she said with a sigh, reaching forward for the file containing the necessary details. The minimal information on the front of the file made her eyebrows raise, "a Dutchess! Well, we've dealt with royalty before."
She opened the file and reached forward to the intercom button.

HMM HMM, the noise was almost apologetic.

Hilda looked up immediately.

"May I be of assistance?" she asked automatically, whilst her brain screamed at her that something wasnt right, after all it's not everyday that a skeleton, albeit one wearing a very old and ill fitting suit, appears in the chair opposite you.

MISS ANNERSLEY?

"Yes," she replied uncertainly.

I BELIEVE YOU ARE EXPECTING ME

Hilda's head shook, no surely not, she hadn't been expecting the grim reaper to appear in person in her office, yet even has her head shook her hands had reached for the file in front of her.

"Mr G Reaper" she read uncertainly from the file.

YES

"Grandfather of Susan Sto Heilt?"

YES

"Really?" Hildas eyes, which had of course never needed glassses, bored into him.

TECHNICALLY, KIND OF Death appeared to be flushing slightly, as much as bone could flush ADOPTED, he added finally.

"Very well," Hilda opened the file fully and began to read the checklist. "So Susan, your, er, grand daughter, is an orpahn, she's 16 and has been to boarding school since she was,"

SIX, HER PARENTS THOUGHT IT WAS FOR THE BEST, SHE HAD SOME, BAD HABITS

"Really, it seems a little young, her parents?"

COACH ACCIDENT

"I am sorry, Susan was how old when it happened?"

TWELVE, SHE TOOK IT QUITE WELL, I SUPPOSE IT WAS ONLY NATURAL WHEN THERE IS A DEATH IN THE FAMILY

Hilda's eyebrows raised further, her brain still screaming at her that this conversation couldn't possibly be taking place.

"Her school have sent her grades, and reports, it seems that she is a very, accomplished, young lady. Mr, er Reaper, why exactly do you want her to change schools?"

AH WELL, SHE'S BEEN IN A SPOT OF TROUBLE, Death mumbled quickly.

"What sort of trouble?" Hilda asked sharply, knowing full well they had enough fire brands in the school already.

WELL THERE WAS THE TROUBLE WITH THE MUSIC, THEN THE BOY IN THE FISH SHOP, SHE'S SKIPPED OUT OF SCHOOL A FEW TIMES, THERE WAS THE TROUBLE WITH THE RAT AND THE RAVEN, OH, AND THEN THAT BUSINESS WITH THE TEETH

"The teeth," Hilda repeated almost as though mesmirised. Suddenly she shook her head violently, "her school doesn't mention any of these, well apart from her absences, tell me, truthfully, they haven't asked you to remove her."

NO, I, THAT IS WE, THOUGHT IT WAS FOR THE BEST, TO FIND HER A NEW SCHOOL

"Really?" there was strong hint of sarcasm in her voice, which her colleague Nell Wilson would have been proud of.

YES

"The best for whom exactly"

EVERYONE, SHE NEEDS GUIDANCE AND TRAINING

"You believe that the Chalet School is the best place for Death's Grandaughter to get such things?"

YES, YOU SEE, YOU GIVE YOUR GIRLS A SOUND, WELL ROUNDED EDUCATION, PLENTY OF FRESH AIR AND EXERCISE, SHE WILL HAVE NO TIME TO THINK ABOUT BOYS, MUSIC OR ABSCONDING FROM SCHOOL

"True, well we've had difficult pupil's before Mr Reaper, I am sure that with time Susan could settle down to be a true Chalet Girl, her grades are excellent and therefore we can accept her at the start of next academic year."

THANK YOU, Death rose to his feet, OF COURSE, THERE WAS ONE OTHER REASON I CHOSE THE CHALET SCHOOL

"Oh, yes, and that was," Hilda asked politely

SHE'LL GET PLENTY OF SYTHE PRACTICE IN, AFTER ALL, WITH ALL THE LUCKY ESCAPES YOU'VE HAD ON EXPIDITIONS AND SUCH LIKE, YOU ARE BOUND TO LOOSE A FEW GIRLS SOONER OR LATER.

#2: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:05 pm

Oh I like that! Thank you Santa - my favourite character from the Disc World too! Laughing

#3: Author: macyrose, Location: Great White North (Canada)

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:12 pm

What a good crossover story! Terry Pratchett is one of my favourite fantasy authors. I can just imagine a story called "Death Comes to the Chalet School." Very Happy

#4: Author: Guest,

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:20 pm

That is great Santa. Laughing

#5: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:20 pm

Thanks, Secret Santa. Lesley is very lucky!

#6: Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:22 pm

Sorry, I was the guest, I keep getting logged out for some reason.

#7: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:28 pm

That was fabulous Santa!!!

#8: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 10:56 pm

Fantastic!

Thanks Santa

#9: Author: Cath V-P, Location: Newcastle NSW

Posted: Tue Dec 13, 2005 11:13 pm

Oh, that's brilliant. Very Happy

#10: Re: The Last Prospective Parent Interview Author: Elle,

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 9:40 am

CBB Secret Santa wrote:

SHE'LL GET PLENTY OF SYTHE PRACTICE IN, AFTER ALL, WITH ALL THE LUCKY ESCAPES YOU'VE HAD ON EXPIDITIONS AND SUCH LIKE, YOU ARE BOUND TO LOOSE A FEW GIRLS SOONER OR LATER.

This line made me give an amazingly high pitched giggle! Thank God I wasn't teaching.

brilliant.

#11: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 10:53 am

Brilliant, had me in stitches! Thank you!

#12: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 12:50 pm

Wonderful! Thanks Lesley's Santa Very Happy

Liz

#13: Author: Róisín, Location: Galway, Éire

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 3:11 pm

Very funny Very Happy

#14: Author: Tiffany,

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 5:04 pm

a Death in the family... Very Happy

Am giggling like a loon.

#15: Author: BethC, Location: Worcester, UK

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 7:39 pm

Thank you, Lesley's Santa!

#16: Author: Rowena, Location: NE England

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 9:45 pm

oohh I DID like that one Very Happy

#17: Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire

Posted: Thu Dec 15, 2005 12:16 pm

Lovely, EBD crossed with TP. Thanks, Secret Santa.

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