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The Big Fat drabble Party (communal)
http://www.the-cbb.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=1741
Author:  kimothy [ Sun Dec 03, 2006 2:43 pm ]
Post subject:  The Big Fat drabble Party (communal)
I feel since tis the season to be jolly, we should have a festive drabble. I'll start it, but please anyone feel free to join in. In fact you must all join in 'cos i have no idea where this is going! :lol:

It was the start of the christmas holidays at Freudesheim. But sadly life was not all jam for Jo Maynard, famous authoress.

Firstly, the quads had woken up that morning yelling their heads off. And Anna had not come to the rescue for almost ten minutes, and then had had the tenacity to ask her, the mistress of the household, to help since there were four of them. Of all the cheek!

Then when she had finally gotten back to bed she had found out that her space there was taken. And that Jack was very busy. For an older woman Nell Wilson sure could move!

Christmas was going to be no fun this year.

Especially not after her toyboy Reg, had decided he wanted to be faithful to his wife again.

Then the worst possible thing happened, which made everything else pale in comparision...
Author:  Elle [ Sun Dec 03, 2006 8:21 pm ]
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As Joey was trying to heave herself into her mail order M and S 'fat pants', she was startled by a knock at the door. Cursing quietly to herself, Joey attempted to hop down the stairs with the 'fat pants' somewhere mid thigh, after all she couldn't expect Jack to answer the door, considering her was so carefully examining Nell's tonsils. Flinging open the door with some considerable force, Joey tripped over the Christmas nativity Scene and precipitated herself into the arms of...
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:19 am ]
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Hilda Annersley who had not come to see Joey and seek her advice about some problem new girl but to....
Author:  Sugar [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 1:38 am ]
Post subject: 
(interesting idea)

hit her over the head with a brick.
Author:  LizB [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:52 am ]
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Somewhere in the snow between the School and Freudesheim, however, she had lost the brick in a drift of snow, so she was hurriedly trying to come up with an alternative plan and an excuse for turning up there. Finally, she thought of something to say ...
Author:  alicat [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 12:45 pm ]
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"Joey, good morning! Don't worry," as she spied Joey's deshabillee "I've not come to breakfast, I just wondered if Nell was all right. She said she was going to pop over to see Jack as her throat was rather sore this morning, and of course we don't want an outbreak of anything among the girls so close to the Christmas holidays!"
Author:  kimothy [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 6:48 pm ]
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But miss annersley forgot the rest of what she was going to say as joeys pants fell down....

"They are my pants!!" she bellowed.

"But jack gave them to me!" joey shrieked back.

Upstairs Anna was stading outside Jack and Joey's room with a frying pan in her hand...
Author:  Elle [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 6:53 pm ]
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As the door opened Anna raised the pan ready to strike down Joey, the bane of her life, however instead of Joey, she brought the pan crashing down on Jack, who had finally finished examing Nell's tonsils and was heading to the bathroom to freshen up in time for breakfast.

Reeling from the force of the blow Jack fell down the stairs, his unconcsious body becoming entangled in Joey's (or Hilda's) fat pants.

Both women screamed as...
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 7:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
He bounced several times (certain parts of his anatomy flapping around for all to see - most totally unappropriate for the ladies of the Chalet School) and ended up lying on the floor in front of them still, gray and to all appearances....
Author:  Jennie [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 9:47 pm ]
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Jo took refuge in a fit of hysterics, which fitted her rather better than the fat pants, until Nell Wilson sauntered downstairs and gave her a good smack round the face.

She was joined in this enterprise by Hilda who decided to take advantage of the moment by kicking Jo in the ribs. Having vented her spleen to her satisfaction, she stood back and said,

'Yes, Nell I know, we're not supposed to kick someone when they're down, but at the moment, I can resist anything but temptation.'

Grinning widely, both women then turned to their self-appointed task of resuscitating Jack.
Author:  Aquabird [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 10:09 pm ]
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...to which they applied themselves with great eagerness. They were, in fact, so eager that they ended up scuffling on the floor trying to get in first. They looked up to see...
Author:  Jennie [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 10:17 pm ]
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Anna stalking down the stairs with a look of fury on her face.
Author:  Elle [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 10:21 pm ]
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"Run!" cried Hilda, and grabbing her fat pants she legged it back to the school as fast as she could.

Nell turned to follow, but tripped on Hilda's misplaced brick, with a wild yell Anna charged towards her...
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 11:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Though neither of the stately headmistresses would admit to it they were very scared of what Anna was going to do to them. But it turned out that she had only yelled like that to get them to stop.

"You! You should have let me help you." She told them in a flurry of fast German.
Author:  Jennie [ Mon Dec 04, 2006 11:30 pm ]
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'Well, we could always do with a cup of your coffee, Anna. And i'm sure it will be good for Frau Doktor Maynard to get some more of the same bracing treatment.'

The three women stood grinning together.
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 12:45 am ]
Post subject: 
When all of a sudden they heard footsteps coming up behind them and turned around to see that there fun had been interrupted by Madge Russel who had come to visit her younger sister.

It would be the first time they had spent Christmas together in many years. But she knew that the news she had to share with Joey would mean that it was far from the traditional Russel/Maynard/Bettany Christmases of old.
Author:  LizB [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 7:15 pm ]
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Forget family harmony. There would be none of that when Jo heard that the latest scans had shown Sybil was expecting Quins. Perhaps it would be better to wait until after Christmas dinner before she broke the news, she wouldn't want to forfeit Anna's cooking after all.
Author:  Elle [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:09 pm ]
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However Madge had forgotten Jo's psychic powers. Wriggling out of the fat pants, Jo dived at Madge, "I always hated that girl! How dare she attempt to outshine me! She will die. She will die!"

Seizing a handy shotgun, Joey rushed out of the house intent upon reaching Sybil in Australia and shooting her and anyone associated with her.
Author:  Vick [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:31 pm ]
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Unfortunately, she had forgotton to put any outer clothes and as soon as she got half way along the driveway....
Author:  Alison H [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:46 pm ]
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... Bruno, the world's worst-trained dog, who'd followed her out of the house, knocked her over. Joey fell into the snow, shivering with cold in only her underwear, and the shotgun went off. There was a shriek as ...
Author:  Elle [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 10:48 pm ]
Post subject: 
...she met the whole of the Chalet school out for a ramble...
Author:  Karry [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 11:12 pm ]
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"Mamma" yelled the triplets, quads and quins, "Why are you out in the snow like that? Don't you remember that you catch penyumonia at the drop of a hat, not to metion your unmentionables?!"
Author:  Lyanne [ Tue Dec 05, 2006 11:37 pm ]
Post subject: 
As Joey began the familiar rattle of bronchitis, Madge ordered Anna to put the kettle on.

"Ja mien Frau. For steaming Frau Joey?"

"Of course not! We need hot coffee, Anna." Replied Madge.
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 12:05 am ]
Post subject: 
"Ja, Coffee. And Lemon Biscuits?"

Serving up the treats, Anna and Madge sat down for a chat the likes of which they had never had before. And somehow they managed to forget about Joey which meant...
Author:  alicat [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 2:37 pm ]
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That she lay outside, still, white, and to all appearances.......


(I've always wanted to use that line....)
Author:  Jennie [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 5:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
highly indignant at being left there to cope by herself.

She finally stormed into the house, only to find that her sister and the co-heads of the CS had found her 'secret' bottle of gin and had got stuck in. What was worse was that Anna was with them, sitting in a large armchair with her feet on the fender, and knocking back pina coladas.

With one accord, the four women turned round and yelled at her.''Shut that b****y door, will you, you're making a draught.'
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 5:45 pm ]
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Mustering what little strength she had she slammed the door for all she was worth in the hopes that this would show her disgust at her treatment.

Unfortunately for her they paid no attention to her antics and simply went on working on that bottle of Gin and having a merry little pre Christmas party. There was nothing else for it, she would have to faint. That would make them realise. And with the skill borne of several years of "ill health" she slumped to the floor.
Author:  kimothy [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 8:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
unfortunately for her, the four ignored joey as Jack came in at this moment- clamly using his wifes body as a doormat.

Nell instantly started to perform a striptease while Hilda embarassedly averted her eyes, not so anna who appeared to be watching her in awe.

They were once more interuppted. this time by the clarion tones of someone who turned all their blood cold...
Author:  Vick [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 9:05 pm ]
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Mary-Lou stalked into the room and demanded "What do you all think you are doing in here? You should all be outside shovelling the snow!"

Nell paused in her striptease, vest in hand. "Mary-Lou! I thought you were busy bossing everyone about in Egypt. What are you doing here?"
Author:  Alison H [ Wed Dec 06, 2006 11:43 pm ]
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"Oh, I didn't like Egypt at all," Mary-Lou said. "No-one appreciated my advice one little bit. I tried telling them that they should move the pyramids to a better location and that they should try diverting the Nile, but no-one took any notice: they really were horribly rude. Even worse, I expected the Red Sea to part for me like it says in the Bible, and it didn't. I couldn't understand it all. Very peculiar place. So I've come back here - and not before time, by the looks of it. What on earth is going on in here?"
Author:  alicat [ Thu Dec 07, 2006 1:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
Luckily for everyone at that moment Verity Anne arrived, having come to spend her Christmas break in the bosom of her family. Drooping prettily on the doorstep - she had arrived unnoticed among the hubbub in the Platz's only taxi - she raised her silvery tones and piped:
"Oh Mary-Lou, how good to see you again. I have struggled so hard to get my case up the path but I could only manage to drag it to the gateway..." she broke off pathetically, and Mary Lou at once raced to fetch the luggage, pausing only to hug her sister-by-marriage and order: "You little gump. Get your wet things off at once or you'll be ill for Christmas!"

Swiftly Verity slammed and locked the door behind her, then reached for her handbag, which bulged with duty free.
As you've nearly finished that gin," she remarked calmly, "We'd better start on this" and produced a bottle of peach schnapps, nicely chilled by her journey from the airport.
"It should take Mary Lou at least half an hour to find all my parcels in the snowdrift in left them in."
Author:  Miranda [ Thu Dec 07, 2006 2:41 pm ]
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Half an hour later, just as the last drops of peach schnapps were being slurped by Nell, a commotion was heard at the front door. Anna staggered from her chair and went to the window. She was unable to find the middle of the curtains, so, frustrated, just tore a hole with her teeth at eye level. Peering out through the curtains she stifled an exclamation when she saw...
Author:  kimothy [ Thu Dec 07, 2006 6:33 pm ]
Post subject: 
david russell looking very annoyed as mary-lou started berating him as he drove up the drive, he revved the engine of his porsche clearly getting ready to run over his unsuspecting victim but just then...
Author:  Elle [ Fri Dec 08, 2006 3:38 pm ]
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he was interupted in his musings by Hilda Annersley who ran out of the chalet, seized a random, un-noticed before now, axe and proceeded to attempt to cut off Mary-Lou's head...
Author:  Jennie [ Fri Dec 08, 2006 7:11 pm ]
Post subject: 
which she half managed. Unfortunately OOAO's larynx had not been severed, which left her very vocal.

Alas, and woe, and all other such terms. a very new dctor on the Platz, so new that he had never heard of OOAO, (Does such a person exist?) was simply longing to have a go at stitching arms and legs, etc. back on, so he rushed the victim to the San and ordered every available member of the theatre team to help him. As soon as they discovered who the victim was, they downed tools, leaving him to do evertyhing himself.

But, back at Freudesheim...................
Author:  Alison H [ Fri Dec 08, 2006 11:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
"Looks like we're out of drink, Dave," Verity grumbled.

"No problem, I know where that stuff Uncle Jack slips in Auntie Joey's drinks is. It'll knock your socks off!" David said.

"Sounds good," Verity said happily. "So tell me, Dave, why were you trying to run Mary-Lou over? Shame it didn't quite work, but, still, there's always next time. Been interfering in your business as well as everyone else's, has she?"

"Oh it's worse than that," David groaned. "Mother says that either Rix or I have got to marry her, because she's the heroine of the Chalet School so she needs to marry a doctor who's part of our family. Neither she nor Mary-Lou will take no for an answer."

Verity shuddered. "No wonder you wanted to run her over! So have you got your eye on someone else then?"

"Well, actually, that's why I'm in Switzerland," David began, as the door opened and in walked ...
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Sat Dec 09, 2006 3:32 pm ]
Post subject: 
Those great inseparables Kathie Ferrars and Nancy Wilmot along with Sharlie Andrews...
Author:  Jennie [ Sun Dec 10, 2006 2:35 pm ]
Post subject: 
who immediately thumped David ont he back, grinning wildly, and chorused,'

'So who's the victim then? Marrying OOAO, are you?'

They then laughed wildly, until they noticed Madge's face which had become set in frown lines.

'That girl is not coming anywhere near my family and my home. If you marry her, David, we'll disinherit you.'

She shuddered and carried on,' There's no way I want to hear that voice at the breakfast table.'

Then she paused for a moment.

'I know, we'll...............
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Sun Dec 10, 2006 4:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
Hold her down while you get the old axe onto her again. And for goodness sake make sure you aim for - and hit - her larynx this time!
Author:  Elle [ Sun Dec 10, 2006 5:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
So, in the manner of 'Reservoir dogs' the intrepid crew set out to dispose of the horrific Mary-Lou. Each carrying a weapon of choice...




(It has taken me ages to type this due to the booze imbibed)
Author:  kimothy [ Sun Dec 10, 2006 8:18 pm ]
Post subject: 
verity had for some absurd reason taken a hockey stick, hilda a kitchen knife, madge a chair, and nell one of joeys lime green socks (to knock OOAO out).

David had declined the offer to go to the massacre. Preferring to stay in the warm saal with the lovely young teachers and the booze.
Author:  Jennie [ Sun Dec 10, 2006 8:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Mind you, he quickly realised tthat they all thought he was a big girl's blouse for staying in the warm, but the younger ones quickly realised that it might just be their chance of bagging a doctor.

Their responses to the situation were different, but equally eye-catching.
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Tue Dec 12, 2006 1:07 am ]
Post subject: 
Unfortunately, however, they didn't last very long. For young Sharlie soon realised that David really was a bit of a sissy (even if he was the son of the top boss) and did she really want a doctor who would not be able to rescue her? For she was a mistress at the Chalet School after all and they got into situations from which a doctor must rescue them on a very regular basis.

And as soon as she stopped Kathie and Nancy stopped too being more interested in each other than the opportunity of "catching a doctor" and having only taken part to stop people talking.
Author:  Vick [ Mon Dec 18, 2006 10:22 pm ]
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Once he realised no one was paying attention to him any more, David slipped out of the Salon and headed towards the kitchen regions of Freudesheim, where he encountered......
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Mon Dec 18, 2006 11:16 pm ]
Post subject: 
Karen, Anna, Rosli, Marie and Rosa who their mistresses thought were swopping new recipes and catching up on the odd bit of family news. However as David soon discovered they weren't very happy to see him because that wasn't what they were doing. He did see what they were doing but had no idea exactly what it was and just new that a hasty and very fast retreat was called for.
Author:  Elle [ Mon Dec 18, 2006 11:34 pm ]
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Unfortunatley for David Anna, Rosli, Marie and karen did not want anybody to discover and reveal their plans. Before he realise what was going on David found himself tied to a chair, gagged and shoved in the cellar.
Author:  Cath V-P [ Tue Dec 19, 2006 12:54 am ]
Post subject: 
It was dark in the cellar and very quiet...or was it? David realised that there was the distinct sound of heavy breathing emanating from the direction of the coal-heap, and it was definitely getting louder. David tried to open his mouth to yell, then rememberered that he was gagged and couldn't. The breathing grew closer; it was now accompanied by a faint tapping.
Author:  Elle [ Tue Dec 19, 2006 12:51 pm ]
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The tapping was getting closer and closer, now accompanied by a faint 'swooshing' noise, David closed his eyes in terror, not that it made much difference, the celler was dark anyway. The noise grew closer, something soft hit him the face and then a ten ton weight leapt upon him, a hot tongue slid over his face. David spat the gag out, "Matron" he yelled, "Get off me!"

"Woof" replied Bruno.

David fainted.
Author:  Jennie [ Wed Dec 20, 2006 4:55 pm ]
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Just then, Jack and Reg walked in, arguing madly. It seemed that Reg had borrowed Jack's favourite lipstick without asking for permission first, and Jack was mightily annoyed.

Finally, he stopped the argument by hitting Reg with his handbag.

Reg was undaunted. 'Huh,' he said snarkily. 'You're not even up to date enough to have the latest from Fendi.'

Then they saw David and Bruno, and they also saw what Bruno was doing to David.
Author:  Vick [ Wed Dec 20, 2006 5:45 pm ]
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"Quick, grab the camera!" Jack shouted to Reg, their argument forgotten. "This is too good to miss"
Author:  wheelchairprincess [ Thu Dec 21, 2006 12:30 pm ]
Post subject: 
And then in their haste to grab the camera they ran straight into each other making so much noise that they attracted the attention of the ladies who were on the Joey bashing mission (although thankfully Joey herself remained oblivious and unconscious). Running down the stairs they all stopped dead, absolutely dumbstruck at the sight of David and Bruno...
Author:  francesn [ Fri Dec 22, 2006 12:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Bruno had always harboured a secret hatred for David and discovering his arch-nemesis gagged and bound to a chair was far too good an opportunity to miss. The ladies delicate sensiblities were upset by the sight of David lying on the floor with his throat ripped out and Bruno, his jaws dripping blood, positively grinning.
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