The CBB :: View topic - Much ado about nothing

#1: Much ado about nothing Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:43 am

I enjoyed reading some of the drabbles – especially ‘the term when nothing happened.’ There’s been a bit of Joey bashing (more than usual) on the CBB, so this is a reprieve of sorts. It’s light hearted and fun so don’t take it seriously or literally!!

Much ado about nothing

There was an expectant flurry in the staffroom of the Chalet School at the Gornetz Platz. Nancy Wilmot, gazing out of the window, had spotted the Red Peril careering across the field which separated the school from Freudesheim, the Maynards’ home. The staff had not seen much of Mrs Josephine Maynard in the last ten months. It had been an uneventful year at the school, hence the excitement at Joey’s anticipated visit. The teachers put away their paperwork and the tea things were set up. Soon after, a familiar figure in a faded green dress and hair like a haystack framed the doorway.

“Come in, dear,” Nell Wilson called out from the windowsill on which she was perched, “Don’t stand there as if you don’t belong.”

“Where have you been all this time?” asked Mddle Lechannais, doyenne of the staff, pouring the tea out into delicate china cups, “Tea or coffee?”

“Any news Jo?” asked Rosalie Dene, the school secretary.

As Jo walked across the room, several faces followed her progress to the nearest armchair.

“Good morning everyone! What kind of a welcome is this? Questions! Questions!”

“Well? What have you been doing with yourself?” commanded Miss Annersely standing by her desk, stately and imposing.

“Nothing much,” Jo replied.

“Lemon biscuits or apfeltorte?” interrupted Mademoiselle.

“We haven’t seen you before,” Kathy Ferrars said, “today, that is.”

“Neither hide nor hair, Josephine Maynard,” added Nancy Wilmot.

“Where have you been, Jo? You are usually up here everyday,” thus Matron.

“Not everyday. I do have other things to do,” Joey replied, surveying the staff in front of her.

Last edited by flitterwit on Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:50 am; edited 1 time in total

#2: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:44 am

“We were worried,” Nell explained, “It’s not like you to be isolated. You’re always in the thick of things. We were going to send a private investigator round to find out where you were.”

“Oh my!” Jo retorted, a bit startled by Miss Wilson’s seriousness, “It’s awfully good of you to be that concerned.”

“Jam or honey on your scones?” Mddle Lechannais again.

“Did none of you think to come and talk to me or telephone?” Joey stated the obvious. They all looked put out by this simple, sensible suggestion.

“We were very busy,” was Nell’s lame excuse.

“We did worry when we hadn’t spoken to you,” said Sharlie Andrews, one of the younger teachers.

“Once we saw you near Das Haus wearing your old school blazer. We did wonder if that might have been a signal that you wanted us,” Rosalind Moore supplemented.

Joey tried not to laugh, “That is the wackiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“Not a message then?” Sharlie asked.

“Not a sausage,” Jo replied, eyes dancing with amusement, “Be most kind as to refrain from associating me with the wacky. If I wanted to see you I could have walked across and spoken to you myself.”

“Your Anna mentioned to Cook Karen that you insisted on bread twists and frothy topped chocolate for Kaffee und Kuchen,” Nancy said, “ We though it was a sign that you were planning to go to the Tiernsee.”

“Must you persist with this madness? I am wearing a green dress today. What does that signify?” asked Joey.

Miss Wilson exchanged a glance with her co-head Miss Annersely at the absurdity of the younger staff members.

#3: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:44 am

“Come, confess,” she said to Jo, “What was so important as to keep you away from us?”

“I was very busy creating a mystique around myself,” Joey retorted, with a chuckle. What she couldn’t say was that she was simply fed up with the school being embroiled in her business. She wanted some peace and quiet and private time to herself.

“You must understand,” said Mddle, carrying her own cup of tea over to the sofa, “We’d heard some very strange things about you in the village.”

“Someone says they saw you by the Trumelbach Falls last Thursday.”

“It wasn’t me,” Jo replied, “I’ve never been there before.”

“Weird!” squealed Kathy Ferrars.

“Are you sure?”

“I was safely in the kitchen baking cakes that day.”

“How are the children?” asked Miss Annersely.

“Cecil and the twins are in the garden with the Coadjutor. The boys are all behaving themselves. Len, Con and Margot are doing very well,” Joey answered and then added suspiciously, “Why?”

“I’m not one to gossip….,” began Miss Annersely.

“Apparently, Len was seen cavorting around the upper platz at midnight,” Miss Wilson supplied.

Joey raised an eyebrow. The staff were well aware that she would not let any of her daughters out at that time of night and Miss Annersely listening to rumours took the proverbial biscuit.

“What else have you heard?” she asked, archly.

#4: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:45 am

“Oh, Jo,” exclaimed Nancy Wilmot, “Con was seen talking to some beatniks.”

“Unlikely,” retorted Joey, astounded by all this. She never thought her family could arouse all this interest and nonsense in the village.

“The Graves-Courvoisier chalet reported some howls and shrieks coming from the Freudesheim. Has Con been sleepwalking? Has Bruno turned rabid?”

Joey was exasperated, “It’s nothing to do with us. All is fine at Freudesheim. You are all letting your imaginations run wild.”

“Joey, ma cherie, there were rumours that you, yourself, had the black eye and the nasty scratches on your face. I am not saying that Jack….”

“Mddle Lechannais! How dare you suggest such a thing? Jack would never…”

“When you didn’t come we thought the worst. Peut-etre, he has slipped a leetle too much something in your drink.”

“Oh no,” Jo protested, “ He has learnt his lesson. He won’t do that again.”

#5: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:46 am

“How is Dr Maynard fairing these days?” asked Miss Annersely.

“I have no idea. I haven’t really spoken much to him. He’s no doubt stalking the platz, doing what doctors do – rescuing people.”

“Oh really Joey,” exclaimed Miss Moore, the newest staff member, “Such bitterness! You did have trouble with that doctor who was after you in the Tiernsee hospital. There’s no need to taint them all with the same brush.”

“You know all about that, do you?” Jo retorted, resentfully, “Are any of my other private business common knowledge?”

“Joey, my dear, “ Miss Annersely chided, “I must pull you up on one thing. Did you tell Jem that practising in England was a step down after managing a Sanatorium?”

At this point, all the female staff looked at Jo with undisguised hostility.

“Poor, Sir James.”

“How could you, Jo?”

Joey was honest if nothing else, “I was a little harsh, perhaps, and tactless. It must have been a spur of the moment thing. It’s not easy being so notorious amongst my friends and having all my deeds analysed. I am desperate for some privacy.”

“Jo, You mustn’t start one of your rants. I demand you say something nice about Jem, at once,” Miss Annersely said tersely.

#6: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:47 am

Joey felt like an embarrassed schoolgirl at this rebuke. She thought for a moment and then said, “ Oh, he seems intelligent and conscientious, by all accounts. An expert in his field. A good personality. Lovely. What else?”

“Josephine Maynard, “ said Nell Wilson, “ you must learn to curb that sharp tongue of yours.”

“I said Jem’s lovely. Now, leave him alone and talk about something else.”

“Any news from old girls? Frieda? Marie? Robin? Mary-Lou?” asked Nancy Wilmot.

“Nope,” replied Joey.

“Is it true that Gotfried is relocating to Berne and Gisela might come to stay on the platz?” asked Miss Dene.

“I really don’t know.”

“Is Daisy Rosomon returning to medicine?” demanded Kathy Ferrars.

“I have no idea.”

“No news at all?” thus Sharlie, “You have let us down.”

“I’m not perfect,” Jo snapped. “It’s not my fault if noone tells me anything. Why don’t you tell me what’s going on instead?”

#7: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:47 am

“It’s been quiet at school this year. No alarums and excursions,” Miss Wilson said, defusing the situation, “We thought you might have something to tell us.”

“So noone knows anything,” Joey said, resignedly, “Great! Brilliant!”

“Are you keeping something from us? No quads or quints in the offing?”

“I really haven’t done anything. Is that so hard to believe?”

“Not even shopping?”

“Joey, my girl, you have a reputation to uphold,” Matron exclaimed, “Supply us with some entertainment.”

“Can you not make up something or imagine something? Just for us?” squealed Rosalind Moore plaintively.

“Not even for you. I have my principles.”

Then seeing all the markedly disappointed expressions all around her, Jo said, “Wait. I did do something yesterday….”

They all held their breath.

#8: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:48 am

“I moped around the house musing about the fineness of the world,” a collective groan resounded through the room, “The day before that I just wafted about experiencing things. The day before that I was swaning around in my kimono.”

“The pink one with the lilies?” Rosalind Moore interrupted, “I bought one just like yours.”

“So have I,” added Kathy Ferrars, “I got mine from the Hamel shop in Innsbruck.”

“Me three,” squealed Miss Andrews.

“How do you know what my kimono looks like?” asked Joey, darkly.

There was a slight pause.

“You must have told us,” Miss Andrews quipped, eyeing Joey’s silver bracelet and deciding to get herself one exactly like that.

Joey grimaced, “ I would have remembered if I had. By the way, Kathy, that belt you are wearing; I have one just like that at home.”

“Tut! Tut! Amnesia perhaps?” Miss Wilson teased, as a means of diverting the conversation.

“Pray, why are you looking at me like that?” Joey snapped, “I was not talking to you. I was talking to someone else.”

“Touche, Jo. The sharp tongue strikes again. Do you have to be so insufferable?”

Joey was inured to all comments by then and said, “ I aim to please. Am I not all sweetness and gentle naivety, then? Anyway, I must leave. I just have time to visit the girls over at the finishing branch. Then I have to make some plans. I think? I was hoping something different might come along. Oh, well. Never mind!”

“Come back, won’t you?”

“And next time bring some news with you.”

“Who knows? Maybe. Maybe not.”

#9: Author: Alison H, Location: Manchester

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:48 am

This is something different! Thanks flitterwit.

#10: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:50 am

an amusing tale, thanks flitterwit

#11: Author: Elle,

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:56 am

ROFL

Thanks. very funny.

Very Happy

#12: Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 12:46 pm

Thanks, Flitterwit.

#13: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 1:51 pm

Thanks flitterwit

Liz

#14: Author: gaityr, Location: Singapore

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 4:25 pm

What a strange, hilarious conversation! I love how the staff kept plying Joey with food and eyeing her clothes and everything!!
Thanks flitterwit!

#15: Author: Fatima, Location: Sunny Qatar

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 5:10 pm

That was lovely, thank you, flitterwit.

Quote:

He’s no doubt stalking the platz, doing what doctors do – rescuing people.

That was my favourite line in the whole thing! Laughing

#16: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 7:30 pm

I was waiting and waiting for something to happen all through that! Wonderfully funny.

#17: Author: Chalet_school_lover, Location: Gloucester

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 9:00 pm

That was very amusing!! I love the way you wrote it! It made me smile! Thank you very much! Very Happy

#18: Author: flitterwit, Location: london

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 12:15 am

all the drabbles on CBB are great fun and wonderfully brilliant!! i like reading them. appreciate all the nice replies from lovely CBBers. this effort was not as funny as the 'uneventful term,' as its such a non-event! writing drabbles gives me something different to do which I enjoy.

#19: Author: Le Petite Em, Location: Cheltenham

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 6:07 pm

The mistresses are so obsessed with Joey and all her belongings that they almost sound like stalkers themselves, never mind the doctors!!! Very Happy

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