The CBB :: View topic - Family Rows at Freuedesheim

#1: Family Rows at Freuedesheim Author: Phil, Location: London UK

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 8:10 am

“Pig!” SMACK!
“Beast!” THUMP!
“Swine!” BASH!
“Cad!” CRASH!
“Scum!” WALLOP!

“OW!” “YEOWCH!” “MAMA!”

Nine year old Charles Maynard and his ten year old brother Stephen were having a fight, over the train set that had accumulated through the Russell, Bettany and Maynard families. Both boys were red in the face and blood spattered their noses and lips.

Meanwhile six year old Mike was explaining to an enraged Jack just why he had painted Papa’s bath in bright red enamel paints.

“Papa, you said you wanted to redecorate your bath! I would do it for you!” pleaded the unhappy Mike.

Trying not to laugh, Jack said grimly, “Not in that colour and not in enamel paint!” Taking Mike by the scruff of the neck, he gave him some rags and some thinners. “You will clean every scrap of paint out of the bath, young man or you will get a good hiding my lad!” Terrified, Mike set to work, tears in his eyes.

After setting Mike to his task, Jack heard the kerfuffle his other boys were making.

Charles was now throttling Stephen, both boys overbalanced and Stephen’s head went through a valuable glass fronted cabinet which had belonged to Jack Maynard’s great grandfather. The glass shattered and blood poured from Stephen’s head. Charles fell on the cabinet and a leg broke.

Jack grabbed Charles and practically threw him to the other end of the room. Swiftly examining Stephen, he ascertained that there was only superficial scarring, head injuries always looked very bloody. Stephen froze. Jack grabbed Charles, pointing at Stephen’s injury.

“Maybe this will teach you two to stop fighting!” He roared. “I ought to bang your heads together! Do you have any idea how much it will cost to repair that cabinet? Have you? No! I should thrash the pair of you now! Charles, get a dust pan and brush from Anna and clear this mess up!” Jack continued his examination of Stephen, and Charles in tears returned to sweep up the mess he had created. He took it away to the kitchen for disposal. Charles returned.

“Right young man. I don’t care what caused this argument, (it was Stephen’s fault), but you will make amends allright! Thankfully your brother only has a superficial wound. I know it looks ugly, but you will bathe the wound and bandage it under my supervision, then if you know what is good for you, you will tidy your room and Stephen’s and Michael’s. You will both of you stay in your rooms until you are called, and you can forget about that trip to Lake Lucerne! I’m still undecided about giving you a darn good tanning!”

Tearfully, Charles asked, “Papa, why do you hit us if we do anything wrong?”

This was a red rag to a bull. Coldly, Jack said, “Well why don’t you, your brothers and sisters listen? Yes! Use your ears and try listening to your mother and I! That applies to all of you!”

With the boys settled, Jack hoped that would be an end to today’s ructions, but oh no!

#2: Author: Alison H, Location: Manchester

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 8:48 am

Shock horror - I thought all the Maynard children were far too well trained to fight, apart from Margot who went around throwing bookends at people without getting into trouble for it!

#3: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 10:34 am

Thanks, Phil. I enjoyed reading about all the fights and mischief the boys were getting into and I look forward to reading more.

#4: Author: Jennie, Location: Cambridgeshire

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 1:34 pm

I hope there'll be more of this soon.

#5: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 2:32 pm

Well Charles' question is perfectly reasonable! Nice to see the boys being boys (and at least Steve wasn't badly hurt!)

#6: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2005 8:49 pm

Poor Mike! He was only trying to help.

Thanks Phil

#7: Author: Phil, Location: London UK

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 8:12 am

“Oh Felix! You naughty boy!” Jack heard Joey scolding.

Bruno had left a large parcel of his “business” in the garden and Felix and Felicity had run straight into it, without realising, during a game of tag. Felix was in the Speisesaal aiming for a cream cake and Felicity was up the stairs and on her bed with her stained shoes! She heard Mama scolding Felix and realised her bedclothes and carpet were stained with dog mess! Horrified, she retraced her steps in time to hear Mama say, “Where’s Felicity?” Joey realised to her horror when she saw Felicity’s woebegone looks that dog mess was everywhere!

Anna entered and shrieked in horror! She had so much to do, laundry and dinner preparation! She made for the cleaning cupboard. Joey was firmly against this.

“No Anna! Felix and Felicity must clean this up! Then perhaps they will be a bit more careful about where they are walking!”

At the sound of this fate, the twins were most tearful. They couldn’t bear to look at Mama’s face when she was in that mood!

Joey was already in a bad mood. She was working on the second part of her latest novel and had to do some proof corrections as soon as possible! Now she felt she had to supervise her careless infants in this unpleasant task.

Jack came in to see what the fuss was about. Joey told him in no uncertain terms, and could Jack help? Jack put his foot down, he was supervising Charles treat Stephen’s injury, which would take time. In addition to this, he needed to check that Mike was cleaning the bath properly and not drinking the thinners!

Then, with the worst timing in the world, Len and Margot crept furtively in…

“Where have you been?” growled Joey. “Where’s Con?”
“We don’t know where Con is…she’s in a poetry moment somewhere…” Len’s voice quavered. She and Margot could sense they had entered a war zone.

“We thought we would play football, and the ball got stuck up a tree, so…” Margot’s attempt at explanation tailed off. Their clothes were muddy, stained and torn and Mama and Papa were looking really very angry!

“And you didn’t think to change your clothes?” said Joey, the words were like acid!

“It was a spur of the moment thing Mama, and after Papa’s window broke!” Oh dear, Len had given the game away. The football had gone through Papa’s study window.

Jack Maynard rushed to his study to see the damage! He would get Charles or Mike to clear that up whilst Stephen was confined to bed.

Joey fixed her Margot and Len with a look similar to a Basilisk. “Helena and Margaret. Go upstairs and change. You will wash and mend those dresses! Clothes cost money! Really your behaviour is no better than Mike’s! All of you can forget about that visit to Lake Lucerne! Now find Constance and bring her here! I have some work for her! Hopefully I can trust her!”

Smarting under this scolding and tears forming in their eyes, Margot and Len slowly trudged away.

Then Con appeared…

#8: Author: Liane, Location: Manchester

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 8:25 am

And what's Con been up to?

#9: Author: Gerrie, Location: Ireland

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 10:37 am

Not a good day at Freudesheim! I'm feeling nervous for Con...
Thanks Phil

#10: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 7:50 pm

I'm feeling very nervous for Con. And isn't it typical how parents start calling children by their full names when they're in trouble?

Thanks Phil

#11: Author: Le Petite Em, Location: Cheltenham

Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2005 9:09 pm

Oooo Con!!!
Very shocked that the Maynard children could be so bad!!!

#12: Author: Elle,

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 7:52 am

This is great!

Thanks Phil.

#13: Author: Phil, Location: London UK

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 8:05 am

Joey is furious! Don't worry she does some serious grovelling later

If Len and Margot had the worst timing in the world, Con’s was no better. She had been hiding in the attics to get away from the noise of her brothers’ rows and had been dreaming up a sequel to her latest story.

For the past few weeks she had been slipping down to Mama’s writing study to pen her tale of the Maynard family of Pretty Maids House during Restoration England. As a little girl, she had visited Pretty Maids before Jack had given it to the government authorities. It was when Uncle Bob was still alive. A jolly old fellow who had delighted in his triplet nieces as they ran around the aged corridors of Pretty Maids, playing in the priest hole, which Bob discovered as a boy, climbing trees and so forth.

Con’s description of the Tudor house was so vivid, she relied on stories her father told her and of photographs shown to her. She had put all her love into that work. Her characters were loosely based on relatives: Sir Richard was Uncle Bob, whose son Rufus (late cousin Rolf) had been killed during the Civil War. Young James (Jack) Maynard was bringing his bride Joanna (Joey) back from her stay at the French court to look after Pretty Maids. It was a tale of romance, with quirks of humour.

Con had wanted to make some corrections and slid down from the attic, down the stairs and into Mama’s study, to find the papers she was working on had gone! So she did the logical thing. She asked Mama where they were.

Still glaring at Len and Margot, Joey said in a distracted voice, “I’ve posted it!”

“You’ve posted my story Mama? To whom?” Con was intrigued. So were Len and Margot, who were prepared to risk Mama’s wrath to listen to this.

“What story Constance? I have posted part one of my novel. I haven’t posted anything of yours.”

“But that bunch of papers on the mahogany unit from Auntie Mollie…”

“Yes that’s Part One of my new novel.” A note of impatience sounded in Joey’s voice.

A look of horror appeared on Con’s face! “B…b…bb… b but I thought it was scrap paper Mama….I thought you wouldn’t mind…I wrote my story on it!”

Joey froze. Could her day get any worse? She had been on the verge of blasting Stephen and Charles for fighting, but Jack had intervened, Felix and Felicity had got dog mess in the house, Michael was cleaning the bath and as for Len and Margot, but Con!

She stared at a terrified Con. With an unnatural growl, Joey grabbed her second triplet and carted her off to her study. Con squealed. She had never before seen Mama look so angry! Len and Margot followed, their poor sister! What was to happen to her? Mama was pointing to the mahogany unit and shouting at Con, who was weeping like a waterfall.

“The manuscript on this unit? This one here? Answer me Constance!” Con nodded, too distressed to speak. “You stupid, foolish girl! You are never, never to enter here without my permission or supervision again! Do you hear me?” Con was so shocked she could only manage a brief nod. She looked ready to faint. Len and Margot longed to comfort their sister. “Go to your room. I am too furious to deal with you, young lady. I shall have to retype the whole thing! I ought to skin you alive!” Then in the worst rage possible, Joey shouted, without thinking, “Perhaps you should remember there is only ONE writer in the family and YOU should concentrate on your schoolwork! Now go! Get out of my sight!” It was an unforgiveable thing to say.

Con fled in tears, her whole world shattered. It was then Joey noticed Margot and Len. She rounded on them. “I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO GO TO YOUR ROOM!” Almost in hysteria, she picked up the first thing handy, a hairbrush and looked ready to use it as a weapon. Len and Margot beat a hasty retreat in fear, feeling this counted as one of the worst days of their lives!

#14: Author: Elle,

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 9:50 am

Evil Joey! Though for a minute I thought she was trying to pass off Con's story as her own, which would have been really harsh!

Thanks for the update.

#15: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 12:58 pm

*wondering if Con's story will be preferred to Joey's*

Thanks Phil.

Liz

#16: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 2:45 pm

Thanks, Phil. That is horrible that Joey says that there is only one writer in the family. How is Con meant to have a chance?

#17: Author: Le Petite Em, Location: Cheltenham

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 5:31 pm

Joey is so mean Mad

I really hope they prefer Con's story to Joey's!!!!
Thanks this is so funny!

#18: Author: Phil, Location: London UK

Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 1:10 pm

Joey sank into her chair behind her typewriter. The faithful Anna had taken over Felix and Felicity’s punishments and the three boys were confined to their rooms, their punishments done. Joey completed her last corrections to part two of her novel and checked that Con had not written on them. She sealed them in a package for postage. She sat back and sighed. She had not lost her temper like that since she was six when Madge had forbidden her to go to the park on a very cold day. She felt some affinity with her unfortunate niece Sybil. She did some breathing exercises as Jem had taught her and stared at the family photos she had plastered on the wall opposite.

She picked a photograph of Con in Canada. Suddenly guilt surged through Joey’s body like a torrent. Oh no! What had she said to Con? What had she said to her poor sensitive dreamy baby? How could she have said that? Yet, she had been so angry! She must have broken her daughter’s heart! How cruel! What an evil, wicked mother she must be! The phone rang. It was probably Madge, she usually rang about now. Maybe Madge would help.

Meanwhile Con shivered, sandwiched between her two sisters, who held on to her. “Mama doesn’t love me any more! She hates me! I promise I’ll never write again! Honest! Only it’s the only time I really feel alive is when I write. Oh if only I was more like you!” Con sobbed.

“You wouldn’t want to be me; I’m naughty Margot, bad Margot, wicked Margot, lazy Margot! I’m always being scolded. All I want is some fun. How many times has Auntie Hilda had me on the mat? And what about Matey? You wouldn’t want to be me Con!” said Margot, with feeling.

“I’m sick of being Little Miss Responsible and Goody Two-Shoes! Just occasionally, I wish I didn’t have to be responsible and grown up! No, be yourself Con, we’ll always love you.” Consoled Len. Then as a sudden thought, she said, “Tell us what you wrote Con!”

“You really want to hear?” Margot nodded vigorously. Con, a glimmer of hope in her eyes, launched into ‘storyteller mode’ and told the tale of Sir Richard Maynard, who enjoyed the patronage of King Charles II.

Downstairs, Joey put the phone down. It had not been Madge, but her publishers. Part One had been received and an assistant had noticed Con’s story and was about to request Mrs Maynard rewrite the relevant pages, when she read Con’s story and was impressed! As the woman concerned was a great Josephine M Bettany fan and would have done anything for her, she retyped the relevant pages herself. Then with Con’s story before her, she presented it to her superior, along with Part One of Joey’s new novel. The whole of this tale had been related to an astonished Joey who was for once, at a loss for words.

“You have a very talented young daughter, very talented. With your permission, we would like to submit her story as an entry in one of our competitions. It is the correct length, the winning prize is twenty five pounds and publication in a book of short stories by children which we are producing.” Consulting Jack within five minutes, Joey had said, “Please enter Con’s story!”

Joey tore upstairs, happiness for Con mixed with an overwhelming wave of guilt over what she had said. She quietly entered the room her triplet daughters shared to hear the end of Con’s tale. At the sight of their wild mother, the girls weren’t sure what she was going to do and they huddled together trying to look small. Joey cringed inwardly. Was she such a terrifying monster? She had been. Tears welled up in Joey’s eyes.

“Darlings! I’m so sorry! Mama hasn’t come to scold! Oh Con dearest I’m so sorry!”

Sobbing, Joey fell on her daughters, “I’ve had a call from my publishers. Someone has retyped those pages and guess what? They’ve put your story in for a national children’s writing competition!” There was no reply. The triplets were too shocked.

Joey felt worse. “Con darling, they loved it! Sweetheart I am awfully sorry I said those things! It was a horrid thing to say! I didn’t think! I was so angry! There are TWO writers in the family! Please forgive me! Con, my love, don’t look so sad! Mama loves you and is proud of you! Now we must arrange for you to write on some different paper from Mama so it doesn’t happen again!”

Con raised a tear stained face to her mother. “Is it true? Can I write?”

Joey smiled, “You certainly can and may! Come on girls! Let’s celebrate with dinner!”

Jack had mixed a little draught for his highly-strung wife and for Con. They didn’t want her sleepwalking! Mike, Felix and Felicity had their meal in the nursery thoroughly subdued and very sorry. Forgiven by their parents they went to bed, relieved the day was over.

Five equally penitent Maynard children reached the dinner table that night. Never before had such a set of woebegone infants appeared before their parents. The sight was almost comical! For them, the best part of the evening was to go to bed having been forgiven. A bonus treat was Mama singing them a little song to help them sleep.

Madge had eventually telephoned and listened to her guilt ridden sister as she poured out the day’s events. Joey had waxed lyrical about how “I’m a bad mother! I don’t deserve such beautiful babies or a husband! I am not fit to be in charge of Bruno!” Madge had provided an understanding and sympathetic ear. She had felt she was a bad mother over her difficulties with Sybil.

Weeks later, Con Maynard had the best news of her life! She had won the competition! First prize! Excited phone calls were made To Auntie Mollie in New Zealand, Uncle Dick in Cornwall and to Auntie Madge in Armiford. A visit to London was arranged with a very proud Mama, where Con was interviewed about her story. Auntie Hilda even broke off her holiday in Chepstow to visit, promising a mention in the Chaletian, school assembly and a copy in the school library, in pride of place next to Mama’s books!

Joey glowed with pride in her second triplet, who had always worried she was overshadowed by Len and Margot. However, the day was Con’s! Writing was her vocation and passion. She was a person in her own right, a quiet girl maybe, but when she put her effort into such a thing as this, she outshone her sisters. She even outshone her mother, who when her entry ina story competition was placed by Jem, only got second prize.

Meanwhile, Con was seeking inspiration from the rambling building known as the Quadrant for her latest!

#19: Author: Mrs Redboots, Location: London, UK

Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 8:25 pm

Thank you for that, Phil - I thought it was a great story, and I'm glad Con got her start as a writer! Maybe you've got yours, too....

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