Borrowed Wings
The CBB -> St Agnes's House

#1: Borrowed Wings Author: pimLocation: the Derbyshire wilderness PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 7:21 pm


As if I didn't already have enough on my plate I seem to have acquired Clara the short story bunny. Luckily as she's only new she hasn't had a chance to develop Charley-esque tendencies yet and is quite happy to be packed off to Auntie Ally. Anyway, Clara decided she wanted to write a story about Naomi, so here it is. Muchas gracias to Vikki and Ally for betaing Very Happy

I've flown too high on borrowed wings

Imagine, if you can, losing everything that you hold dear in one fell swoop. I would never have imagined that it would happen to someone like me. How is it possible? Sometimes it can be one of those things that crosses your mind, a brief fleeting though pushed roughly to one side and forgotten about. It won’t happen to people like me. But who are people like me? I know the person that I used to be, before I lost everything – my past, my memories, my family, my hopes, my dreams. All I ever wanted to do was dance. I used dance as a way of expressing myself, of trying to put into action how I felt about the world around me, a world filled with unnecessary cruelty, a world I was trying to understand. And then one day my world fell down around me.

I withdrew from the world then, retreated into my shell. I couldn’t stand to be around the pitying looks, the snatched whispers of the attempts to be sympathetic. I didn’t want sympathy, I wanted my life back. I could see them pointing at me, the murmurs, the label of the ‘poor orphaned cripple’. I wished that I could face them, challenge them, make them stop pointing and labelling me. What right had they to put me in a box and categorise me? I no longer felt as though I was a person by that stage, I was just a label. I wished that everyone would stop trying to explain. I didn’t want things fobbing off with the excuses I heard so often – ‘she’s lost her parents’, ‘she’s a cripple’. I felt so restricted to the point of screaming, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to add to the reasons they had for pointing, whispering, categorising. Without my dance I was lost, unable to express myself in the way I always had done and nobody understood. They kept trying to get me to talk, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t use words to express myself in the way that I had used dance. And so I got pushed to one side, ‘the crippled orphan’, blaming the fire for the way I was. I could hear the excuses they made for me, I wasn’t deaf. But how could I explain?

School, being sent away, it was them saying that they couldn’t cope with me anymore. I heard their hushed conversations about me, saying my mind was twisted, how dare they? They had never tried to understand what I’d gone through, just left me alone to try and get on with things. All I wanted was someone to talk to, someone to hold me and tell me one day things would be better. I wanted someone to listen to me, to try and understand. I didn’t want to be pushed away like an old or broken toy, to be ignored as though I didn’t exist. I couldn’t explain it to them, they never listened to me, never took my feelings into consideration. I was pushed about as though I didn’t matter, as though I wasn’t allowed an opinion, or feelings on any subject and certainly not on my own future. Was it any wonder I hid myself away behind a wall of bitterness?

At school I was suspicious of their motives, thinking they were only pitying me for being the ‘crippled girl’, the stupid label that had plagued me for so long. But they wouldn’t understand, they were just school girls with no real idea. It took time for me to realise that they weren’t and that for the first time people genuinely cared for me and wanted to help me for me and not just because I was ‘the crippled girl’. I couldn’t describe what that meant to me, and it was then that I learned to live again.

Please, my wings, fly me away

(Opening lines are pinched from Flown Away by Lene Marlin)

 


#2:  Author: AllyLocation: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!! PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 7:47 pm


Lovely to see Naomi's view of her situation, thank you Pim, that was beautiful Very Happy

 


#3:  Author: RroseSelavyLocation: Oxford, UK PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 7:48 pm


Pim, that was lovely. You can really understand her frustration. It's a shame EBD didn't develop Naomi more as a character - she just seemed to disappear, so it's nice to see things from her point of view.

 


#4:  Author: RuthYLocation: Anyone's guess PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 7:58 pm


It's good to see Naomi's point of view because she's one of those characters who has a major part in one book and is mentioned a couple more times but really just forgotten about just another character to throw away,

Ruth

 


#5:  Author: patmacLocation: Yorkshire England PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 8:07 pm


That was lovely Pim. Poor Naomi!

*wonders if Clara could be encouraged to be more assertive*

I agree that Naomi's story would make a fascinating long drabble. As EBD didn't develop her later, it could go anywhere.

*Innocently asking what is Clara's favourite food?*

 


#6:  Author: LesleyLocation: Allhallows, Kent PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 8:24 pm


Thank you Pim, such a wonderful measure of frustration. People with disabilities don't want sympathy, they don't want the disability.

Thank you.

 


#7:  Author: VikkiLocation: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!! PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 8:38 pm


Pim, that was luffly!

And as I said, Clara is a very clever bunny!!!

 


#8:  Author: Carolyn PLocation: Lancaster, England PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 8:53 pm


Thank you Pim, that was beautiful.

 


#9:  Author: KatieLocation: A Yorkshire lass in London PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 8:57 pm


That was lovely Pimmy. Nice to see inside of Naomi's head Very Happy Thank you!

 


#10:  Author: francesnLocation: away with the faeries PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 9:15 pm


a lovely insight into naomi - thank you, pim (and clara)

 


#11:  Author: MarianneLocation: Lancaster PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 9:18 pm


poor naomi!
thanks pim!

 


#12:  Author: KatLocation: Swansea PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 9:31 pm


Crying or Very sad

That was lovely Pim, thank you Kiss

 


#13:  Author: LizBLocation: Oxon, England PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 10:08 pm


Thanks Pim and Clara

That was simply beautiful

Liz

 


#14:  Author: AnnLocation: Newcastle upon Tyne, England PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 11:07 pm


*waves to Clara* Nice to see you again!

That was excellent, Pim, thank you.

 


#15:  Author: RosieLocation: Huntingdonshire/Bangor PostPosted: Sun May 15, 2005 11:13 pm


Thanks Pim, that was really lovely.

 


#16:  Author: JoeyLocation: Cambridge PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2005 9:16 am


That was amazing, Pim. Such insight. I always thought Naomi must have been surrounded by ignorant people before she came to the CS.

Thank you so much.

 


#17:  Author: EmilyLocation: Land of White Coats and Stethoscopes. PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2005 11:35 am


That was really moving, thank you Pim.

 


#18:  Author: NellLocation: London, England PostPosted: Mon May 16, 2005 12:33 pm


Beautiful, thank you Pim.

 


#19:  Author: DawnLocation: Leeds, West Yorks PostPosted: Tue May 17, 2005 9:55 pm


Nell wrote:
Beautiful, thank you Pim.



Says it all

thankyou Pim

 


#20:  Author: RachelLocation: Plotting in my lair PostPosted: Wed May 18, 2005 6:34 pm


Very thoughtfully written Pim. Beautifully descriptive of Naomi's feelings.

 


#21:  Author: SusanLocation: Carlisle PostPosted: Fri May 20, 2005 2:50 pm


Thanks Pim a beautiful story.

 


#22:  Author: MollioLocation: Ireland PostPosted: Mon May 23, 2005 2:44 am


Thought provoking and beautiful. Thank you.

 


#23:  Author: GemLocation: Saltash/Aberystwyth PostPosted: Tue Jun 14, 2005 10:19 pm


Absolutely beautiful, Pim. Thank you Kiss

 


#24:  Author: ChairLocation: Kent, England PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 2:57 pm


Can someone remind me if Naomi lost all her family in the fire? Also, who is Clara?

 


#25:  Author: LizBLocation: Oxon, England PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2005 6:02 pm


I believe Naomi still had an aunt - wasn't it an aunt her sent her to the Chalet School?

Clara is the name of Pim's plotbunny.

Liz

 




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