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#1: Realisation Author: Katarzyna, Location: North West England

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:14 am

Jack slammed the door to her study behind her and threw herself on the bed, turning over to lie on her back, fully clothed. She lay for a while scowling to herself, trying desperately to get her thoughts into some sort of order.

After a while her eyes began to roam around the room, taking in her school books, the pretty pictures and ornaments left on the walls from previous Head Girls. Her eyes fell on the small cluster of silver bells that had been a gift from her mentor, Len Maynard, along with a piece of her wedding cake.

Irrationally her eyes filled with tears which she dashed away with impatience using the back of her hand. What was wrong with her, why was she behaving like this? Had she felt like this a few years ago she would have relieved the feeling of frustration and confusion with some mischievous outburst but as the Head Girl of the Chalet School in her final term she could not allow her temper to get the better of her.

Swing herself round and perching on the side of the bed she reached out for the bells, holding them in her hands she replayed the days events in her head.

This morning’s prefects meeting hadn’t been too onerous, the usual griping over duties and middles, but nothing more than could be expected for this stage in the term. Following that she had spent the morning at her studies, she had already been accepted to UMIST on an physics and engineering course, which in itself was unusual as at her interview she had been informed she would be the first female student to sit the course.

Lunch had passed without incident, she and her small group of friends had then withdrawn for the rest period chatting quietly amongst themselves. That was where the discontent started, her closest friends, Wanda, Arda and Renata had quickly turned the conversation to their future. Jack had known for a long while that her friends aspirations for their future revolved around love, marriage and eventually families. They accepted she was different, that marriage and children were for her something that yes, might eventually happen, but for now she wanted a career, to do something with her life.

Love itself was subject which Jack shied away from, she had received a rude awakening to the subject over Easter when her sister Anne had appeared for the weekend and regaled her with stories of a young doctor at the hospital who had caught her eye and, it appeared, she had caught his. Yes Jack felt affection for her friends, for her family, but love?

Turning the bells over in her hands she returned her thoughts to the days events, after break she had been returning to lessons when she ran into Dr Entwistle. He had been called to the school to check over a couple of girls who had been taken ill, Jack had met him in the corridor. It was now she realised that this is when her temper had started to slip.

Placing the bells back on the table she stared hard at them, tears forming in her eyes once more. Why did she feel like this, she used to like Dr Entwistle, was pleased that he and Len were marrying, now, she didn’t feel that way. As her head examined her heart she suddenly recoiled physically, jumping back on the bed. That was wrong, yes, Len was her mentor, she looked up to her, admired her, but love, well yes, she admitted to herself that she did love her. It was then the questioning started, was it just that, she loved her sister, she loved her friends, but she never felt any resentment to them having other friends. Why did she feel the way she did about Dr Entwistle, thinking back she remembered only once feeling the same way about anyone, Jane Carew, when she first arrived at school.

Looking back now with the benefit of a few years growth and maturity she could see that her behaviour towards Jane stemmed from jealousy more than anything else. So why should she be feeling the same about Dr Entwistle. Yes, he had married Len, but that didn’t stop her being Jack’s mentor, that didn’t stop her being Jack’s friend, it didn’t stop the way Jack felt about her or, Jack was sure, the way Len felt about her.

Her hands reached out again for the bells, her thoughts confused, was it that she loved Len, or was it that she was in love with her. Silently she allowed the tears to fall.

#2: Author: Rosy, Location: Gloucestershire-London-Aberystwyth

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:18 am

Wow.

#3: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:20 am

I loved this when I first heard it, Kate. It is so full of feeling.

Poor Jack. Crying or Very sad

#4: Author: Liane, Location: Manchester England

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:24 am

*echoes Rosy*

#5: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 8:33 am

Thank you Kate.

#6: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 9:46 am

poor Jack. What a lovely scene. Thanks Kate

#7: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 10:15 am

Thanks Kate - this is great. Poor Jack

#8: Author: Lucy, Location: Leeds

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 10:34 am

Rosy wrote:

Wow.

Thanks Kate - this is really good. Poor Jack

#9: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 10:43 am

That was amazing Kate, thank you.

#10: Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 11:00 am

Thank you Kate.

#11: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:00 pm

Blimey. I had never thought of that possibility. Poor Jack, years and years of her feelings for Len growing and being bottled up with no hope of those feelings being returned.

#12: Author: RroseSelavy, Location: Oxford, UK

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:32 pm

Poor Jack. That was lovely Kate - is there going to be more?

#13: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 12:39 pm

Poor Jack!

Thanks Kate

Liz

#14: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Thu Jul 21, 2005 4:23 pm

Thank you Kate! That was amazing, and when you think about it, very plausible!

#15: Author: Cath V-P, Location: Newcastle NSW

Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2005 12:14 am

Poor Jack, and so very believable.

#16: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2005 11:50 am

What a lovely story. I felt sorry for Jack that her feelings weren't returned by Len.

#17: Author: Sugarplum, Location: second star to the right!

Posted: Fri Jul 22, 2005 7:27 pm

Thanks Kate

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