The CBB :: View topic - Felix Finds Love

#1: Felix Finds Love - Part 2 Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:42 am

Part one

Tra la la Twisted Evil

Geoff gave another ‘I’ll get you back for this later’ look to Phil and took a deep breath.

“You already know her,” he began, answering the last question first. “We haven’t set a date for the wedding yet, but I expect you will all be invited – unless we decide that there will be too much chaos with all our families there and elope.” He paused while various nieces protested and insisted that they must be there.

“What’s elope?” asked Emmie.

“It’s when you run away to get married in secret,” explained Mollie, “but you’re not going to do that are you Uncle Geoff.”

“No, I don’t suppose we will.” Geoff assured her. “Although I can see the advantages of the idea.” he added with a grin.

“Yes, but you’d have to face the wrath of both families if you did!” put in Phil, “which probably outweighs any benefit there might be.”

“Uncle Geoff, you haven’t told us who you’re going to marry yet.” Rosie reminded him. “What’s her name?”

Last edited by LizB on Wed Sep 28, 2005 4:20 pm; edited 87 times in total

#2: Author: Laura, Location: London (ish)

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:46 am

Who is it, who is it, who is it? *bounces* Very Happy

Liz, you're being deliberately mean *sulks*

#3: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:47 am

Hmmm, someone they already know....

Come on, please, Liz, this is a horrid cliff! Very Happy

#4: Author: Katie, Location: A Yorkshire lass in London

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 11:55 am

Wasn't there a pretty nurse, or am I mixing drabbles?

More soon please Lizard. Very Happy

#5: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:53 pm

Awww. Bless Geoff. Looking forward to finding out who it is! (Running through potential CS girls in my head!)

Thanks Liz. Very Happy

#6: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:07 pm

who is it? Very Happy

#7: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:11 pm

Lizard! Stop teasing and tell us....please!?!?!?!?!

#8: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 4:53 pm

*ponders updating versus making you wait Evil or Very Mad

*

*relents Very Happy

*

To the amusement of his parents and siblings, Geoff’s face had taken on a pink hue. “Well, erm … it’s … er… Angela Embury.”

“Angela!” exclaimed Roddy without thinking. “But I thought you two couldn’t stand each other!”

Geoff’s face went a shade brighter. “Well, we couldn’t, but then, well, things change.”

Jack took pity on his youngest son. “Congratulations Geoff. Angela’s a lovely girl and we’re very pleased for you. Reg, you’re nearest the door – can you go and get a couple of bottles and we’ll toast Geoff and Angela.”

Before long those of the family who were gathered there were raising their glasses in best wishes for the newly engaged couple.

#9: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 5:19 pm

Awwww! Angela Embury, how lovely! Very Happy

Thanks Liz Very Happy

#10: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 5:27 pm

I assume one of Winnie Embury's brood? I thought she had all boys - or is this a new baby girl that appeared after the series?

Thanks Liz -and love the way you strung out letting everyone know! Laughing

#11: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 7:24 pm

I'm really pleased for Geoff and Angela. I'm glad Geoff's found the girl for him.

#12: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 7:34 pm

I assume this is the baby born in Feud?

Lesley - if this is indeed her,she was born just before Feud cos Joey went rushing of to see her and missed the arrival St Hilda's (and yes I did autmatically type St Hugh's in there Confused

)

Thank you, Liz - that's lovely news!

#13: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 8:08 pm

Thanks for relenting, Liz! Laughing

Good for Geoff.

#14: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 8:21 pm

Huzzah for Geoff Very Happy

Thanks Liz

#15: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 8:32 pm

Awwwww!!!!!
That was lovely Liz!
(although there was a wicked little part of me that was waiting for Geoff to announce that his intended was male - just to see what would happen..... Twisted Evil

)

#16: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 9:09 pm

francesn wrote:

Lesley - if this is indeed her,she was born just before Feud cos Joey went rushing of to see her and missed the arrival St Hilda's (and yes I did autmatically type St Hugh's in there Confused

)

Thanks Frances - I'd missed that! Laughing

#17: Author: Alex, Location: Manchester, UK

Posted: Fri Aug 19, 2005 10:19 pm

Vikki wrote:

(although there was a wicked little part of me that was waiting for Geoff to announce that his intended was male - just to see what would happen..... )

I rather think that would be Charles, myself.....

#18: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 10:35 am

“So… Geoff and Angela.” Commented Reg to Len later that night, when excited youngsters had been tucked up in bed, and Mollie was in the kitchen. “Did you have any idea about that?”

“Not a smidgen.” Len replied. “They always argued when they were younger and whenever we’ve got together with the Embury’s over the last few years – as Roddy said, they were always fighting over something, and I wouldn’t have expected them to see anything of each other outside those events where they had to, to be honest, let alone get on well enough to decide to get married. It must have been quite sudden.”

“Unlike Catherine and James – are you still convinced about those two?”

“Oh absolutely. Anybody can see he’s absolutely crazy about her?”

“Yes, he is about her, but that doesn’t mean she feels the same way about him – thanks Mollie.” He added as his daughter handed him a cup of coffee. “Do you really think he’ll sit around and wait for her though?”

“Oh, and how long were you prepared to sit around and wait for me if you had to?” asked Len, causing him to nearly spill his coffee as she snuggled up against him.

“I guess you have a point. I was certainly crazy about you.” Reg admitted, setting his coffee on the table and pulling her closer.

“Was?” Len sat up straight and looked affronted.

“Was. Am. Always will be.” Reg told her, planting a kiss on her lips.

Molllie sighed and got up from her chair. “If you two are going to get sloppy I’m going to bed.” she announced and carried her coffee out of the room, leaving her parents giggling like teenagers behind her.

“Well, I think she has an excellent idea,” murmured Reg, and Len giggled again, before they abandoned their coffee and went upstairs.

#19: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 10:51 am

Aww so lovely to see Reg and Len together! Very Happy

And gorgeous to hear how he was crazy about her and still is. Very Happy

Thanks Liz

#20: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 10:52 am

lol I love it - typical child's (in the sense of parents not age) reaction to parental affections at the wrong time!

#21: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 11:28 am

Love that - nice to see Len and Reg so in love still! Laughing

#22: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 12:41 pm

Delightful, Liz. Laughing

Thank you.

#23: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 12:53 pm

Maybe it was a case of hate turned to love for Geoff and Angela. It was nice to see Reg and Len being so soppy around each other.

#24: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 11:09 pm

New Year’s Eve

The music ended and as a more energetic tune started, Felix and Ellie wandered out of the ballroom to a smaller room where several sofas and comfortable chairs were set out. After ensconcing Ellie in an unoccupied corner, Felix went to procure drinks for them both. He soon returned with a couple of glasses of champagne and passed one to her, which she sipped slowly as they sat in comfortable silence. The group of people in the centre of the room left, followed one by one by the others, until they were alone.

“Isn’t it peaceful?” Ellie said softly.

Felix nodded, thinking just how beautiful she looked, her eyes shining like stars. From the ballroom the sound of a ballad started to drift in, and Felix stood up and offered his hand.

“Would you care to dance, Lady Galadriel?” he asked, with a smile that made her heart skip a beat.

“I would be honoured sir,” she replied, standing and giving a small curtsey before placing her hand in his.

They moved gently to the music, their steps keeping perfect time with each other. The song ended and another began. Dr Braun looked in the room as he passed, and smiled as he saw Ellie rest her head on Felix’s shoulder and Felix tighten his arms around her. Both had their eyes closed, but he was convinced even if they hadn’t they would not have noticed his presence, and he slipped quietly away.

Felix moved slowly, treasuring the feel of her in his arms. She was so precious, so wonderful; it was like a dream come true.

Ellie smiled dreamily to herself. It felt so right to be here, so perfect. She wished the moment would last forever.

The music came to an end and there was a pause. Ellie gave a little sigh and slowly took a step back. Felix gazed down into her eyes, reading the answer to his unspoken question. Gently he raised one hand to brush a loose curl from her cheek. Then as she lifted her face to his, he slowly bent his head.

A group of rather merry junior doctors burst into the room, laughing noisily, calling ‘Happy New Year’. Felix’s murderous thoughts were quickly dispelled as he saw his disappointment mirrored in her eyes, and he smiled again.

“Why don’t I get our coats and walk you home?”

She smiled and nodded.

“Wait here, I won’t be long.”

#25: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Sat Aug 20, 2005 11:14 pm

Aww. Felix and Ellie make such a lovely couple. Very Happy

#26: Author: Laura, Location: London (ish)

Posted: Sun Aug 21, 2005 8:31 am

Ahh. Thank you Liz!

#27: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Sun Aug 21, 2005 12:08 pm

It's a shame the moment was interrupted. At least Felix and Ellie got a chance to dance together.

#28: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Sun Aug 21, 2005 3:21 pm

Love the Lady Galadriel touch - how romantic! Very Happy

Thanks, Liz

#29: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Sun Aug 21, 2005 7:21 pm

Awww! That was lovely, but am somewhat concerned about them - can't help remembering what Ellie was thinking near the beginning of this...

Thanks Liz.

#30: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 7:58 am

Ellie sat down and waited, a small smile playing round her lips. Lost in her own thoughts she didn’t notice the new arrival in the room until she spoke.

“I didn’t expect to see you here.”

Ellie looked up and her face paled slightly. “Hello Pamela.” She wanted to add “what are you doing here,” but held back the words.

“Yes, it was quite a surprise to see you here,” continued Pamela, “especially in the arms of that young doctor – Dr Maynard isn’t it?”

“It’s a dance Pamela, we just danced together, that’s all.”

“I wasn’t born yesterday my dear,” Pamela’s tone indicated that Ellie was anything but dear to her. “I have to say I’ve never liked you, never knew what my brother saw in you, but he wouldn’t listen to me – now maybe he’ll believe me when I tell him you’re a common little slut.”

Ellie made no answer, although her cheeks flamed.

“Nothing to say to that have you?” jeered Pamela. “Well, seeing as I’ve seen you with my own eyes, I suppose it would be useless to deny that you’re cheating on your husband.”

A slight sound from the doorway attracted their attention. Felix stood there, his face white, his eyes blazing with emotion.

Pamela gave a small smile, and rose from her seat. “Goodbye Ellie,” she said and walked over to Felix, and smiled smugly at him. “Good evening Dr Maynard, I’m Ellie’s sister-in-law, Pamela, but I expect she’s told you all about my brother and my family.”

Felix did not even look at her, his gaze riveted on Ellie who sat as if carved out of stone, her eyes full of unshed tears. He didn’t even notice as Pamela brushed past him and out of the room.

Eventually Felix moved from the doorway and came and knelt in front of Ellie, not touching her, his eyes still holding hers. “Is it true?” he asked, softly, knowing that he already knew the answer, knowing that to hear it would bring his world to an end, but still having to ask, to hear her say the words herself.

One tear overflowed and traced a path down her cheek. “Yes,” she whispered, her eyes full of sorrow and pain. “Felix, I’m so sorry.”

Felix longed to take her in his arms, to hold her and never let her go, but he knew he couldn’t. He had to go. He stood up and laid her wrap over the arm of the sofa.

“I’m sorry too” he said softly and walked away. As he reached the doorway he turned back for one last look at her. She looked back at him, her eyes full of despair, her lips trembling.

“Farewell Galadriel my love.” He said at last, then walked away down the corridor, resisting the urge to turn back and trying to close his ears to her cry of “Felix” as she buried her face in her hands and sobbed.

#31: Author: Laura, Location: London (ish)

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 8:18 am

Oh no!! Poor Felix. I was expecting her husband to be dead and the sister not to have let go yet Sad

#32: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 8:20 am

Oh no! Poor Felix!

#33: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 9:10 am

oh poor Felix. And poor Ellie. If the hubby is (was?) anything like his sister then she's definitely better off without him anyway.

thanks liz

#34: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 9:14 am

Nooo! Poor Felix. And poor Ellie. Liz please make it better...

#35: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 9:47 am

Thanks Liz.

#36: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 9:49 am

Poor Ellie - why do I have the impression that there is something wrong in that marriage? Poor Felix as well. *thinks hard about a way this might be worked out*

Thank's Liz - but I'll be even happier when you tell us the solution!

#37: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 10:21 am

*crying here*

How could you break their hearts, Liz? Crying or Very sad

#38: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 10:23 am

How could Ellie do this to Felix? Mad

#39: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 1:00 pm

Wibble!!!

LIZ!!!!!!!!

#40: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 1:31 pm

I really hope Felix and Ellie can sort everything out between them. I feel sorry for both of them.

#41: Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 2:27 pm

Argh! I was catching up, thinking how beautifully things were resolving, and then....

At least the title hasn't changed to, "Felix Finds and Loses Love...." Confused

*hopes*
*hopes hope works*

#42: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 4:43 pm

Lizzle, that's norty! come back and post some more!!!

#43: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 6:21 pm

Feel so sorry for Felix here - he must feel he will never find love. Crying or Very sad

Obviously an unhappy marriage - but if her husband is still alive then it looks unsolvable - Felix wouldn't consider wedding a divorced woman - would he?

Thanks Liz.

#44: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Mon Aug 22, 2005 8:03 pm

*hugs poor Felix*

*gloats a little* Wink

#45: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 7:42 am

She was married.

Felix stared out into the darkness. Somehow he had made his way home, although he couldn’t remember the journey. Now he stood at the window and stared out into the night, his mind in a whirl.

She was married.

Why had she never told him? He was sure he hadn’t imagined the connection between them that went so much deeper than mere friendship, he had been careful to make sure not to make that mistake again, he hadn’t imagined the way she looked at him, and he knew they had been a hair’s breadth from kissing when they had been interrupted.

And she was married.

He had been heartbroken once before, when Laura had turned him down, but that paled into insignificance compared with the pain that tore through him now. He had recovered from Laura’s refusal, could see that she had made the right decision, but this time he knew there would be no end to the agony.

She was married.

He stared out unseeingly, not noticing the first snowflakes as they drifted down, or even when they danced dizzyingly outside the window. He saw nothing. All he was aware of was the anguish that had sliced into him when he heard those words.

She was married.

Felix was still standing there, numb to everything but the torment in his soul, his face wet with tears, when the dawn came.

#46: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 7:44 am

Poor Felix. it is so clear how hurt he is, how those words "she was married" tear into him. Liz, please, make it all better. Thanks

#47: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 7:45 am

*crying* *again*

Liz, that was so emotive.

Poor, poor Feliz. Crying or Very sad

#48: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 8:47 am

(((Felix)))

Thanks Liz

#49: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 8:48 am

Poor Felix. How awful. Crying or Very sad

Thank you Liz.

#50: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 9:30 am

that's not a nice happy post! Don't like Felix being miserable - quickly resolve that please Liz.

#51: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 11:52 am

Poor Felix. I feel so sorry for him. I hope everything works out for him.

*Sends Felix loads and loads of hugs*

#52: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 12:58 pm

The telephone kept ringing. Felicity tried to block the sound out, but it rang on and on. She glanced at the clock. Who could possibly be calling at gone three in the morning? It must be a wrong number. With a sigh she pushed back the covers and climbed out of bed, wishing she could sleep as soundly as her husband, but motherhood seemed to have given her more sensitive hearing. Dragging on her dressing gown for warmth she made her way down to the hallway. She picked up the phone, prepared to deal summarily with whoever was calling.

“Yes.” She said, curtly.

“She’s married, Fliss,” her twin’s voice came over the wire, “She’s married.”

“Felix?” she asked, “Felix, what’s wrong? Who’s married?”

“Ellie,” the name was torn from him and Felicity could feel the hurt in his voice. “I fell in love with her Fliss and she’s married. Why didn’t she tell me?”

Light dawned for Felicity. The last few times she had spoken with her twin she had noticed Ellie’s name sprinkled throughout the conversation and had gently teased him about it until he admitted that she was someone special. Now it turned out she was already married and it seemed she had been leading Felix on for her own amusement. She felt her anger start to grow and pushed it down. For the moment, Felix was more important.

“Tell me what happened,” she prompted, and listened as Felix told her about the disastrous end to the ball two nights ago.

“Why do I do it Fliss?” he asked, “Why do I fall in love with women who don’t want me? I really believed she loved me too. What’s wrong with me?”

“Oh Felix,” he could hear the sympathy in his sister’s voice. “There’s nothing wrong with you. I don’t know why this has happened, but it’s not your fault. I promise you.”

“There must be something that makes me keep reading the signs wrong.”

“It sounds like she was giving you signs that she shouldn’t have been giving.” Felicity’s tone was slightly sharper, as she thought of how her brother had been deceived. “You’re not to blame for being an open trusting person – she shouldn’t have taken advantage of you like that.”

“She didn’t take advantage of me, Ellie’s not like that.” Felix was vehement in his defence.

“How can you say you know what she’s like, Felix?" Felicity asked reasonably, “she hid from you that she was married, how much more might she have hidden from you?”

“I don’t know,” Felix was filled with uncertainty. “I just can’t believe she set out to hurt me maliciously, there are some things about her that I do know, that you don’t get to know from what people say, and that’s one of them. She’s a good person.”

“Okay, I’m sorry,” Felicity made an effort to make her voice calming. “Why don’t you ask her?” she suggested a moment later. “Would it help if she explained it to you?”

“I don’t know.” Felix answered. “Part of me thinks yes, part of me thinks it’s better if I never see her again.”

“Well, think about it for a while, you don’t have to decide straight away do you?”

“No, I suppose not… is that the clock?” he asked as the grandfather clock in the hallway struck 4. “I’m sorry Fliss I didn’t realise what time it was.”

“Hey, that doesn’t matter,” Felicity answered, her original thoughts on being woken by the phone forgotten. “You know you can call anytime you need me.”

“I know, thanks sis. But for now I think I’ll let you get your beauty sleep – I know Emilia doesn’t give you much peace in the mornings.”

“Are you sure? I don’t mind if you want to talk some more.”

“No, it’s fine, I probably ought to try to get some sleep myself.” He told himself she had no way of knowing that he hadn’t slept for two nights and wouldn’t be able to tonight either.

“Well, I’ll ring you later, ok?”

“Ok, thanks Fliss.”

“Sleep well Felix.”

She hung up thoughtfully, then went upstairs and snuggled back into bed. Anthony stirred slightly as her cold feet touched his legs, then he turned and gathered her into his arms, and she snuggled close, thinking over the conversation, an idea coming to her just before she drifted back to sleep.

#53: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 1:01 pm

What a fab long post, thanks Liz

Aww Felicity is lovely isn't she? At least Felix has her to confide in.. Crying or Very sad

#54: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 1:04 pm

Aww. Thank you Liz. Wondering what Felicity's idea is - hope it helps.

#55: Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 1:15 pm

Lesley wrote:

Felix wouldn't consider wedding a divorced woman - would he?

If that's the case -- perhaps she's well into the annulment process? The Church won't accept divorce, but will declare that a proper marriage never really existed....

*Cringes at thought of a "husband" with Pamela's characteristics....*

#56: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 1:35 pm

Lesley wrote:

Obviously an unhappy marriage - but if her husband is still alive then it looks unsolvable - Felix wouldn't consider wedding a divorced woman - would he?

If Edward XVII can do it, don't see why Felix can't. And this is set in the 70's after all, when divorce was more common place. Haven't seen any indication that Felix would choose the church over true love.

Thanks Liz. Poor Felix. Sad

#57: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 7:21 pm

Yes but Felix is Catholic - that may be the sticking point.

Pleased that Felicity is so supportive though a little worried about what happened last time she tried to help Felix's love life! Laughing

#58: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 9:35 pm

Thank you Liz! Big hugs for Felix!!

#59: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Tue Aug 23, 2005 9:36 pm

I'm glad Felicity was able to talk to Felix.

#60: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 7:36 am

Anthony looked up as his wife walked into the kitchen. “So you’ve decided to join us then?” he asked with a grin as he poured some coffee. “I wasn’t sure you were ever going to wake up.”

“You’d sleep late too if you were woken in the middle of the night.” she retorted, accepting the mug and sitting down at the table.

“Did I sleep through Emilia crying again?” he asked.

“No, it wasn’t her this time, it was Felix phoning.”

“Felix phoning in the middle of the night? What on earth for?”

Felicity didn’t answer the question directly. “Anthony, do you think a trip to Austria might help with your writer’s block?” she asked.

“I’ll have you know, my book is progressing very well thank you and I do NOT have writer’s block!” he answered, grinning back at her.

“No, but you might have if we don’t got to Austria,” argued Felicity,

“Are you threatening me?” he asked coming round the table and gently removing the coffee cup from her hands.

“Would I do a thing like that?” asked Felicity. “No, don’t tickle me!” she protested as he started his attack. “Alright,” she continued between shrieks of laughter, “if you come to Austria I’ll make it worth your while, is that any better?” The tickling stopped.

“How worth my while?” asked Anthony, his hands still at her waist, his eyes intent.

Felicity slid her arms around his neck and pulled his head down to hers. “How much will it take?” she asked huskily, when they pulled apart, breathless.

“Hmmmmm…. I’m not quite sure yet,” he murmured as he kissed her again. Then, as Emilia began to noisily demand attention, he released her with a sigh. “I’ll accept that as a down payment. You see to Emilia while I phone and book us some flights.”

#61: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 8:29 am

I do so hope Felicity can help her poor brother.

Thanks, Liz

#62: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 8:41 am

Hope Felicity has more luck 'helping' Felix with his lovelife than she did last time!

Quote:

Yes but Felix is Catholic - that may be the sticking point.

Maybe, maybe not. Maybe he'll renounce his religion for her! Laughing

My Uncle did for my Aunt, as she was a divorced woman. (am ever the hopeful romantic!)

thanks Liz.

Last edited by Josie on Wed Aug 24, 2005 8:44 am; edited 1 time in total

#63: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 8:43 am

Josie wrote:

Hope Felicity has more luck 'helping' Felix with his lovelife than she did last time!

So do I!

#64: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:04 am

Me three! Thank you Liz. Pleased Felicity will be there for Felix.

#65: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:06 am

Me four!
Thanks Liz

#66: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 12:42 pm

Much to his surprise, Felix had found he did sleep after he had spoken with Felicity. The sympathy and love that he had felt over the telephone line soothed him and he spent a few hours in a deep, dreamless sleep. When he awoke he took himself to task. Just because his personal life was falling apart, he still had patients who depended on him, he couldn’t neglect them. He couldn’t spend the rest of his life in hiding, he had to go out and face the world sometime, the sooner the better.

Getting up, he showered and then shaved the 3-days worth of stubble off his chin. Looking distinctly more respectable he phoned the San to confirm he would be in the following day and then set to work clearing the mess of broken glass from the kitchen – he had thought of drinking himself into a stupor the second night, but had given up after the 2nd drink and had flung the glass at the wall as he realised that no amount of alcohol would dull the pain. Once that was cleared up he went through the house cleaning and tidying. As he picked up the shirt and jacket he had worn to the ball he got a whiff of Ellie’s perfume from them and sank down onto the floor as he felt his loss anew. After a short interval he got up again, reminded himself that feeling sorry for himself would not help at all, and shoved the clothes into the laundry basket.

Felicity phoned later in the afternoon and told him of her plan to visit. He was slightly dubious at first, but then decided that it might be a good idea and help him not to become a hermit. If nothing else, things were never dull when his twin was around, and he even began to look forward to her arrival in a few days time – she understood him in a way nobody else did.

Eventually at the end of the day, he fell into bed and slept again.

#67: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 1:14 pm

Glad Felix has picked himself up and is moving on. Love the fact he was dubious about Felicity visiting! Thank you Liz.

#68: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 2:41 pm

I'm glad Felix has accepted that Felicity is coming - even if he had no choice!

#69: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 3:06 pm

(((Felix)))

Thanks Liz

#70: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 4:14 pm

(((Felix)))

Thanks Liz!

#71: Author: Alex, Location: Manchester, UK

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 5:52 pm

So long as Felix doesn't contribute to the break up of Ellie's marriage, she might well be able to get an annulment and then there wouldn't be a problem.

#72: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 6:23 pm

So sorry for poor Felix. Crying or Very sad

Josie - hope you are right. Smile

#73: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 7:23 pm

“Mamma?”

Jo looked up from her book. “Hello Catherine, I didn’t hear you arriving.” She smiled up at her daughter.

“May I talk to you?”

“It seems you already are.”

“Oh, you know what I mean!”

“Yes of course – come and get comfy on the sofa.” Catherine curled up at one end, pulling the cushion out from behind her and hugging it to her. A few minutes silence ensued.

“You wanted to talk?” Jo prompted.

“Yes, it’s about … well … you know I changed my name to Catherine.”

“Well, considering I’ve been calling you that for the last two and a half years, I should hope so.” Jo grinned at her.

Catherine smiled back, a little nervously, then continued. “And you know why I did it.”

“Yes.” This time Jo was serious.

“Well, I was wondering whether I should change it back again?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

“Well, it’s just that the reason no longer matters. I met Eric again you know.”

“What?” Jo was astonished and Catherine launched into the tale, explaining what had happened.

“… and now I’ve been thinking, I don’t feel afraid any more. I don’t need to hide any more, so maybe I should go back to being Cecil Maynard again. But I don’t know.”

Jo had noticed at Christmas that Catherine had seemed different – more carefree than before and had wondered at it. Now it all became clear. It wasn’t to do with James Stewart as she had hoped, after all, but, even so, she couldn’t be disappointed with this reason for the change.

“What do you want to do?” she asked, as Jack came in bearing coffee.

“I don’t know – that’s why I’m asking you. I thought you would like it if I changed my name back again. You named me after all, and it’s Auntie Rob’s name, and it would make me a Maynard again.”

“Honey, you never stopped being a Maynard, whatever your name was.” Jack said handing her a mug before sitting in a nearby chair.

“I know, but I meant … well … officially.”

“How do you feel about being called Cecil again?” asked Jo.

“I don’t know. I mean, it was my name for most of my life; I can’t forget that. In some way’s it’s me. But in other ways Catherine is me too. A different me.”

“When you hear the name Catherine, it’s who you are now, but when you hear the name Cecil, it’s who you used to be?” asked Jack.

“Yes, that’s it exactly. I’m not the same person I was three years ago. But like I said, you named me Cecil …”

“It doesn’t matter to us what you’re called.” Jo told her, “as long as we can pronounce it that is!” she grinned.

“‘A rose by any other name would smell as sweet,’ as Shakespeare said,” Jack added, “and Catherine Robertson is still our daughter that we love and are proud of, just as much as Cecil Maynard was.”

“You really wouldn’t mind if I stayed Catherine?”

“Not in the slightest.” Jack assured her.

“We’re so used to it now we’d probably have problems remembering it had changed back anyway,” Jo smiled, glad that her daughter had reached a place where she was happy with herself.

Catherine got up and hugged her, then Jack, “Thank you.” she said, her voice laden with emotion.

There was a moment’s silence then, grinning, Jo spoke again.

“Jack Maynard, I can’t believe you actually quoted Shakespeare – my influence must be rubbing off on you at last!”

#74: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 7:38 pm

Im so glad to see Catherine feeling happy and content with herself, and such wonderful counsel from Jo and Jack. Thanks Liz Very Happy

#75: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 7:41 pm

I just loved Jo's last comment to Jack! The rest was just lovely as well Liz - from the thought that Catherine had, through to the advice that she was still the daughter of Jack and Jo whatever name she went by.

Thanks Liz

#76: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 8:27 pm

Lovely Jack and Jo in this - just what Catherine needed. Laughing

Thanks Liz.

#77: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:13 pm

I'm glad that Jack and Joey reassured Catherine.

#78: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:15 pm

A lovely, loving episode. Very Happy

Thanks, Liz

#79: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:45 pm

Awww! Lovely Maynards

Thanks Liz

#80: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 9:54 pm

Awww luffly Maynards Very Happy

Thanks Liz!

#81: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 10:15 pm

Thank you Liz!!!
Your Maynards are all lovely!!!

#82: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 10:28 pm

They are indeed lovely! The Maynards just as I always thought they would be Very Happy

Good for Jack and Jo - and Catherine too.

Lovel, lovely drabble, Liz.

Now, back to Felix and his 'love'.... Wink

#83: Author: Laura, Location: London (ish)

Posted: Wed Aug 24, 2005 10:46 pm

Awww! Thank you Liz Very Happy

Ye-es, back to Felix and his finding love.. (and not losing it again)

#84: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:37 am

We will return to Felix shortly...

“So have you made up your mind?” Charles asked Catherine when he came in that evening and found her sitting with an official-looking form on her lap, while she gazed into the fireplace.

“Hmmmmm?” Asked Catherine, turning to look blankly at him.

“About those forms – and your name.”

“Well, I spoke to Mamma and Papa about it today.”

“What did they say?”

“They don’t mind what I do. They were so lovely about it.”

“So you’re staying Catherine then?”

“Yes, but …” she trailed off

“If it’s what you’re happier with, then stick with it.” advised Charles.

“Oh it’s not that. I’m definitely staying Catherine. But it’ll be Catherine Maynard.”

#85: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:48 am

Oh that's lovely, and a bit of a compromise, but for how long will she remain Catherine Maynard? Now that is the question! Thanks Liz

#86: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 8:44 am

Thanks Liz, lovely compromise!

#87: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 8:49 am

aw, great. But hopefully she'll become Catherine Stewart before too long...

thanks Liz!

#88: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 10:21 am

Lovely posts - thank you Liz. Do want to know what's happening with Felix too though...

#89: Author: Caroline, Location: Manchester

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 11:13 am

Love this drabble!

Can some kind person point me in the direction of the first half of the story, please, because I was in the US last week and seem to have missed a few posts.

Ta muchly.

#90: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 11:26 am

Caroline, it's about halfway down page 2 of St Therese or alternatively you can find it here

#91: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 12:07 pm

Nell wrote:

Do want to know what's happening with Felix too though...

Not sure if this will quite answer your want Nell...

The knocking at the door wouldn’t stop. Ellie eventually gave up trying to ignore it and got up from the couch to go and send the visitor away. She didn’t want to see anybody ever again, and so she would tell whoever it was.

“Hello Ellie.”

Ellie stared, unable to believe her eyes. The last, or maybe last-but-one, person she expected to come knocking at her door.

“Well, aren’t you going to let me in?” he asked, and she silently opened the door wider. “You look absolutely terrible sweetheart,” he added as she closed the door behind him and turned to face him, and he took in the puffy eyes with rings around them, the unbrushed hair and sloppy comfort clothes.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, when she eventually found her tongue, thinking that he didn’t look that good either – he was a lot thinner than when she had last seen him, gaunt, even, and she felt another stab of guilt at what she’d done.

“Well, that’s a nice welcome for your husband, I must say.”

#92: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 12:10 pm

Ooh more please Liz!

#93: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 12:26 pm

Hmmmm, I dont know what to think right now. Liz - I hope you know what you are doing! *reassures self, of course Liz - or the bunny - knows how this will pan out*. Thanks Liz

#94: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 1:38 pm

LizB wrote:

Not sure if this will quite answer your want Nell...

Nope not quite though it does add yet another layer to the story so I'm not complaining....

#95: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 3:48 pm

So her husband is still alive and not part of his sister's imagination. Thanks for settling that point, Liz.

#96: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 5:58 pm

Oh dear!!

*husband*

What next? Crying or Very sad

Thanks, Liz.

#97: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 7:12 pm

Hmmmm, not sure what to make of this husband - but I'm sure Liz'll let us know eventually! Laughing

#98: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Thu Aug 25, 2005 9:52 pm

Squirrel wrote:

Hmmmm, I dont know what to think right now. Liz - I hope you know what you are doing! *reassures self, of course Liz - or the bunny - knows how this will pan out*. Thanks Liz

Have complete faith that Liz knows what she's doing! She's never let us down before. Very Happy

Thanks Liz. Am sure that Ellie's husband situation has hidden extras - my addled peabrain just can't figure out what!

#99: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 7:19 am

He smiled at her, “If you must know, I saw my poisonous sister, who took great pleasure in saying she’d seen you here and in the arms of another man.”

“I know I shouldn’t have.” Ellie said, “I never meant for anything to happen, but, oh Alistair, it’s all such a mess.”

Alistair put his arm around her and guided her over to the sofa, where they both sat down. “Come on, tell me all about it.” He said.

“There’s not much to tell.” She answered, “He hates me now. So it doesn’t matter.”

“He being?”

“Felix Maynard.”

“The doctor?” there was a slight sharpness in his voice.

“Yes, why, do you know him?”

“I know of him, but that doesn’t matter right now.” he paused, “Are you in love with him?” as she nodded. “So tell me all about it.”

Ellie told him everything from that first meeting with him, to how she had struggled with her feelings of guilt, how she had never meant for him to fall in love with her, believed it was only her own heart at risk and had been willing to take that risk, even knowing it would end up broken. Because of that, because she wanted to be able to enjoy his company and friendship while she could, she had not mentioned her marriage until it was too late and she had hurt him so terribly he could never forgive her. She tried to gloss over Pamela’s part in it, but he knew his sister well enough to read between the lines and made some very unbrotherly, unrepeatable remarks about her.

“I’m so very sorry, Alistair,” she wound up, “I never meant for anything like that to happen when I came out here, I just wanted some peace and quiet for a while. I never meant to betray you.”

“I’m not exactly in a position to be judgemental over it all, am I?” he said quietly. “Why don’t you explain to him about our marriage?”

“There’s no point. It couldn’t make a difference now. He’s never going to want to see me again.”

“Well, when you realised how you were feeling, why didn’t you ask me for a divorce?”

“But I promised you.”

“But sweetheart, if you found your true love, you shouldn’t let me stand in your way. Anyway, I won’t be much longer.”

“What do you mean?”

He looked solemnly at her. “I’m ill, Ellie. Dying.” She shook her head in denial. “Yes, it’s true. There’s a rare cancer, and apparently Felix Maynard has done some experimental work in its treatment, which is how I know his name. But it’s too late for me.”

“It might not be,” she argued, tears rolling down her cheeks, “Alistair, you can’t give up on life.”

“Darling, the writing is on the wall. I don’t need a doctor to interpret it for me.”

“But ask Felix, he might be able to help you.”

“It’s too late for me,” he said again, quietly, and she knew he spoke the truth. “But I thought maybe if he saw me, ran some tests, there might be something he could learn that would help other people in the future. That was why I came to the Tiernsee – I didn’t know you were right here until I bumped into Pamela.”

“Have you seen Felix yet?”

“No, I have an appointment with him tomorrow. I must go to it my dear; I must try to help others.”

“I know you must. Oh, Alistair, why does everything go so wrong?”

He wrapped his arms around her and dropped a kiss on her curls. “I don’t know, sweetheart, I just don’t know.”

#100: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 8:12 am

Awww - what a heartbraking situation, and poor Ellie - she must feel like she has lost one man she loves and is about to loose another. After all, she can hardly feel nothing for Alastair since she did marry him. *wonders, will Alistair explain at least part of the situation to Felix, and will Felix be at work the way he has been feeling recently*.

Thanks Liz

#101: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 8:56 am

Oh how sad. Poor Ellie, ad poor Alastair. What a horrible situation Crying or Very sad

Thanks Liz.

#102: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 9:05 am

Oh *sob*

It really is awful for them.

Thanks Liz

#103: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 9:25 am

How horrible. *sob*

Thank you Liz.

#104: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 9:39 am

Horridness!
Thank you Liz!

#105: Author: Joey, Location: Cambridge

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 10:44 am

O. Wow. What a tangled web!

Come back and sort it out, Liz!

#106: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 12:17 pm

Felix jotted down notes as his questions were answered. By the time he finished the appointment by taking some blood samples he felt a deep respect and an instinctive liking for this man who spoke of his impending death with a calm acceptance and a desire that others should not suffer in the same way. He had no more appointments until the afternoon, so willingly sat and chatted with him for some time. Eventually, Alistair took his leave, shaking Felix’s hand and then saying casually, as if the idea had just popped into his head, “Why don’t you come over for a drink one evening? I’m sure my wife would like to meet you.”

Felix hesitated. He didn’t usually socialise with patients, but then Alistair wasn’t really a patient – he had come to Felix to offer himself to help in his research, not for treatment, so why not.

“Thanks,” he accepted the offer, “although my sister and her husband are coming to visit me for a few days, so maybe after they leave?”

“Oh, bring your sister and her husband too, if you’d like to.” Alistair knew he did not have much time, and did not want to delay his plans if he could avoid it.

“Well, if you’re sure, ok, thanks.” agreed Felix and, after arranging a day and time, Alistair departed, pleased to have achieved the first step in his plan.

#107: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 12:20 pm

Liz, are you trying to drown my keyboard? Crying or Very sad

I was weeping over Alastair and then read the next bit to find he wants to sort everything out before he dies. Crying or Very sad

Thank you.

#108: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 12:29 pm

Alastair seems really nice. I do hope Ellie and Felix react well to him setting things up not badly. Thank you Liz

#109: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 2:16 pm

Maybe there is hope for Felix and Ellie yet! I won't give up on them. I'm glad Alistair has accepted that Ellie has found someone else.

I always love it when someone invites a friend somewhere and they've got someone staying with them so the first person says they can bring the guest along as well!

#110: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 2:31 pm

Ok, now we just have to hope that the shock Felix will recieve will not push him too far out of reach. I also hope that Ellie is at least being given a warning, and that Felicity doesnt react badly either.

Thanks Liz

#111: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 5:08 pm

Felix looked at his notes, circling a word here and there. He had hoped Alistair had been given a wrong diagnosis, he did not fit the usual picture he was too young for a start. Although he would wait for the test results to confirm it, he was certain, however what it was. And the disease was so much more aggressive than Felix had seen before. It had attacked Alistair’s lungs as well as his skin and he knew there was nothing he could do, but help make his last few weeks comfortable.

He felt an unaccountable anger at his helplessness.

#112: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 5:12 pm

Poor Felix, but I still think he will have a big shock when he finds out everything

#113: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 5:30 pm

Oh Liz this is just too too tragic! *Wails*

But thanks anyway - looking forward to the dinner - hope F & E get back together...

#114: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 6:42 pm

Is Alistair gay? Is that why he's not worried about the fact Ellie had fallen in love with someone else, why he said he was in no position to be judgemental and that Ellie should have explained about their marriage?

Regardless it's so sad about his illness - and I wonder how he and his sister can possibly be related, he is lovely

Thanks Liz.

#115: Author: Kim, Location: Tipperary, Ireland

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 9:18 pm

Lesley wrote:

Is Alistair gay?

I'm thinking the same thing. Also reckon his sister doesn't know his orientation and therefore thinks Ellie is really cheating on him

Methinks sparks will fly before the (happy I hope) end.

thanks Liz

#116: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Fri Aug 26, 2005 11:39 pm

Thanks Liz.

#117: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 12:50 am

“Ellie, can I ask you a favour?”

“Yes, of course.”

“I know I have no right to ask this – no right at all – but would you come and stay with me while… until…”

“Oh Alistair, of course I will. I wouldn’t leave you on your own for this.”

“Ellie, you’re a champion. And I’m sorry for the mess you’re in because of me.”

“Well, it’s not your fault.”

“I should never have asked you to marry me.”

“Well you did, and I did so there’s no point thinking ‘what if?’ Life’s too short for – oh, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have said…”

“Don’t worry about it darling, it doesn’t matter. I’ve accepted what’s going to happen. And soon I’ll be out of your way.”

“Don’t talk like that Alistair.” Ellie knelt down and pulled him towards her, holding him tightly in her arms.

#118: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 7:35 am

Poor Alistair, and poor Ellie. I'll be intersted to know what the explanation is behind all of this when it eventually comes out.

Thanks Liz

#119: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 8:47 am

Thank you Liz (posting at ten to two in the morning shocking! Wink

)

Hope everything works out in the end.

#120: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 10:00 am

*crying again*

Poor Alastair and poor Ellie Crying or Very sad

Thanks, Liz

#121: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 10:27 am

Thanks Liz

I don't *think* Alistair is gay .... why would he have married Ellie if he was? Confused

But there is obviously something going on with their relationship dynamic.. ooh intriguing. How sad anyway that he is so accepting of his terminal illness Crying or Very sad

#122: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 11:45 am

Maybe Alistair realisd he was gay after he had married Ellie? I'm glad Alistair and Ellie still get on so well.

#123: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 12:03 pm

Poor Alistair! *cries*

Poor Ellie *cries more*

Huggles everyone.

*cries* Crying or Very sad

#124: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 2:13 pm

*howls*

No I understand how you ended up liking Alistair so much Liz! Thanks you.

#125: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 10:06 pm

This is just so sad, whatever the reasons behind their marriage not being 100% right. They are both so lovely. Crying or Very sad

Thanks Liz

#126: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 10:11 pm

“Hellooooo! Anyone home?” the call echoed through Die Rosen and in response Felix emerged from the salon as his twin shook the snowflakes off before grabbing him in a tight bear hug. Felix returned the embrace, accepting the wordless comfort, before asking where Anthony and Emilia had got to.

“Just here,” Anthony said, pushing open the front door with his foot and manoeuvring the carry cot inside. “Oh thanks Felix,” he added as his brother-in-law went out to help with the rest of the luggage.

The visitors were speedily settled indoors, Felicity taking the opportunity to notice the despair haunting Felix’s eyes, despite his smiles for them. He looked worse than he had when Laura had turned him down two and half years ago. When they had dinner it was clear that, despite his efforts, he had little appetite and his thoughts were often elsewhere.

After dinner she went to settle Emilia for the night and when she returned Anthony went to say goodnight to his daughter, leaving Felix and Felicity alone together.

“Thanks for coming Fliss,” said Felix, “And sorry for waking you up the other night.”

“Hey, that’s ok,” answered Felicity, “You’re my twin, what else could I do when you need me. You know I’ll always be there for you.”

“Yes, but you’ve come out here specially, I didn’t mean to drag you over here.”

“Don’t be silly – I’m glad to come. You’ve come through for me often enough in the past. And we’re going to go and visit Mike and Laura and the twins before we go home, so you needn’t feel the trip is just for your benefit, if it’ll make you feel any better.”

Felix reflected her grin with the shadow of one on his face, although it swiftly passed. “Well thanks anyway. I’m glad you’ve come.” There was a pause. “Am I completely gullible, Fliss? Do I have ‘sucker’ written on my forehead or something?”

Felicity hastened to reassure him, then sat and listened as he poured out the whole story again. Anthony paused at the door for a moment, then slipped quietly back upstairs, thinking it better to leave the two of them alone to talk.

It was late when Felicity finally snuggled down next to him in bed, hoping that being able to let it all out would have helped, and Felix would be able to get some sleep.

#127: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Sat Aug 27, 2005 10:47 pm

Poor Felix. Crying or Very sad

Glad Felicity is there for him.

#128: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 3:15 am

but....but....but.....it was all going to be ok!!!!!

Liiiiz please sort it out Crying or Very sad

#129: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 11:08 am

Felicity is lovely. thanks Liz. Poor Felix Crying or Very sad

#130: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 11:40 am

Bless Felicity. Now as long as she doesn't try that matchmaking trick again....

thanks Liz.

#131: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 12:22 pm

Thanks, Liz. I'm glad Anthony gave the two of them a chance to talk and Felicity is being such a comfort to Felix.

#132: Author: Kim, Location: Tipperary, Ireland

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 9:31 pm

Mia wrote:

I don't *think* Alistair is gay .... why would he have married Ellie if he was?

doesn't necessary follow. Sadly some gays have married for a variety of reasons and sometimes it works reasonably well and other times it is a disaster.

However it seems that they have a good relationship, regardless of the problem they share

Looking forward to more

#133: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Sun Aug 28, 2005 10:06 pm

Kim wrote:

Mia wrote:

I don't *think* Alistair is gay .... why would he have married Ellie if he was?

Sorry if I've been un PC, I didn't mean to be! I was just thinking aloud, as it were (and rambling!) My gut feeling is that he isn't and I don't know why - however sure Liz will reveal it all soon - and expect I'll be wrong! Laughing

#134: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 2:25 pm

Felix knocked on the door as Felicity and Anthony, carrying Emilia, trooped up the path behind him. He heard Alistair’s voice call “I’ll get it darling.” Then the door was open and they were welcomed in.

Felix introduced his twin, brother-in-law and niece as they removed their outer layers and Alistair piled them onto hooks then ushered them into the living room.

Alistair called down the hallway before following the guests. “Darling, our visitors are here. Do you want a hand with the coffee?”

The response could not be heard, but was obviously in the negative as Alistair came and sat down, saying “She’ll be here in a minute.”

Some small talk about the weather and how long the snow would last followed. Felicity was just expounding on how much she was missing a ‘proper’ winter now she was living in England, when the rattle of crockery could be heard approaching the room.

There was a gasp. Felicity looked up to see a slim girl with brown curly hair and grey eyes, dark with shock, in a pale face, standing framed in the doorway. She was holding a tray so tightly her knuckles were white. By instinct, Felicity turned to look at Felix.

To a casual glance he would appear no different from usual. She knew him better than that, however, and could see the rigidity in his jaw. And his eyes, which had been full of sadness since they arrived, blazed intensely for an instant, then he blinked and a veil seemed to come over them, leaving them blank and expressionless – dead-looking even. Felicity felt a chill as she saw it.

There was barely any need for introductions to be made, but Alistair made them anyway as he stood to relieve Ellie of the tray and pass around the coffee.

Ellie took three steps to a chair and sank into it, as if her legs would not support her a moment longer.

What was he doing here? Alistair had mentioned he was expecting three visitors, but he had not said who and she had been too wrapped up in her own thoughts to ask.

She shot an agonised glance at Felix, then looked at Alistair in appeal.

He was offering cream to Felicity and cooing over Emilia as if there was not a strained atmosphere in the room. Anthony, who had summed up the situation as the introductions went on, looked long and appraisingly at Alistair, placed a warning hand on Felicity’s arm for a moment, then did his part to help carry the conversation.

Felicity understood the slight pressure on her arm and sat quietly, restraining herself from the questions she would have liked to ask, and putting in the occasional comment to the discussion. Felix and Ellie each sat lost in their own thoughts, oblivious to the social niceties going on around them.

#135: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 3:42 pm

What is going to happen?

Very intrigued! Laughing

Thanks Liz.

#136: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 4:21 pm

I do so hope Alistair and Felicity between them can help.....but I have a horrid feeling there is more unhappiness to come before we get that *happy ending*

Thanks, Liz.

#137: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 4:45 pm

I wonder if Felix will understand at least a little now. I wondered if Alastair would tell Ellie about it - obviously he didnt. I wouldnt like to be in that situation, so I'm feeling sorry for both Felix and Ellie. I hope that Anthony and Felicity can help smooth down the situation, and get things back on track again. Thanks LIz

#138: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:01 pm

His mind whirled. Felix could barely keep track of the thoughts that flitted through it.

Alistair?

Alistair was Ellie’s husband?

Alistair who was dying.

Alistair whom he liked, respected and admired.

Ellie was married to him?

He had wanted to hate Ellie’s husband, but he couldn’t.

He had wished that if Ellie had to have married someone before she met him he would have died, leaving her free.

He wished Alistair would live.

He would have done anything he could to help Alistair live.

But there was nothing he could do.

Ellie was going to be widowed.

And he would be sorry.

Sorry that a courageous man had gone from the world.

Sorry that Ellie would have her heart broken.

The thought of the pain she would suffer, must already be suffering, was unbearable.

#139: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:06 pm

Make it all fluffy again Liz, please!!! (though I am sure you will eventually, thats just too long away)

#140: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:09 pm

Poor Felix - his thoughts all a whirl. I do hope that at some point he will be able to talk properly to both Alistair and Ellie, and find out what the mystery in that marriage is. Thanks Liz

#141: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 6:58 pm

Ally wrote:

Make it all fluffy again Liz, please!!! (though I am sure you will eventually, thats just too long away)

Wot Ally said! Neutral

#142: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 7:25 pm

I hope everyone can sort everything out and I'm glad they've all met. Thanks, Liz.

#143: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 8:19 pm

Poor Felix, such a conflict of emotions. Crying or Very sad

Thanks Lix.

#144: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 10:51 pm

The awkward conversation was interrupted by a wail from Emilia. The cry roused Ellie from her introspection and she offered Felicity the use of a bedroom to tend to her daughter’s needs. With a slight feeling of relief, Felicity followed her upstairs and was shown into a small, neat bedroom.

Ellie left Felicity in her bedroom and shut herself quietly into the bathroom. Leaning back against the door she slowly slid down until she was sitting on the floor. She rested her head on her bent knees as she hugged them to herself and let the silent tears flow.

After a few minutes, she raised her head and got to her feet. Going to the basin she blew her nose thoroughly before splashing cold water on her face and patting it dry. Then taking a deep breath, she unlocked the door and returned to the living room.

#145: Author: francesn, Location: away with the faeries

Posted: Mon Aug 29, 2005 11:21 pm

oh poor poor Ellie

and poor poor Felix

oh noooooooooooo Liz please make it better!

#146: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:02 am

Sooooo sad! Crying or Very sad

Poor all of them.

#147: Author: Kathy_S, Location: midwestern US

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:02 am

What a situation. Poor everybody! Crying or Very sad

#148: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 7:28 am

As she entered the room, Alistair caught sight of the look on Felix’s face. As Felix saw Ellie had been crying, the mask slipped for a moment; the raw emotion he showed confirmed everything Alistair suspected, and he berated himself for the mess he’d got her into. It was not in his nature to dwell for long on what could not be changed, however, rather he turned his mind to finding a way to resolve the problem.

It was a lot more difficult than he hoped. Felix and Ellie both retreated within themselves for the rest of the visit, barely aware of the conversation going on around them. Felicity rejoined them and took her part in the chatter. It had not taken much observation of the room she had been sitting in while Emilia fed to see that it was occupied by Ellie and Ellie alone. Of course, Alistair’s illness might account for that, but Felicity wondered all the same. She did, however, have enough sense to keep her thoughts to herself, until she was able to share them with Anthony in private later that night.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to get involved.” She assured him. “I just noticed, that’s all, but I don’t see how it can help Felix at all. It doesn’t change the fact that she’s married. I don’t understand why she wouldn’t have told him that she was either.”

“I have no idea, but she must have had her reasons I suppose.” Anthony turned back the bedcovers.

“I suppose so. Now I’ve met her, I don’t think she was just playing around with Felix, like I thought. I just can’t imagine not telling somebody I’m married.” Felicity said as she adjusted Emilia’s blankets and dropped a kiss on her forehead.

“Ah, that’s because you’re married to me,” grinned Anthony, “of course you want to boast about it.”

“Modest aren’t you!” laughed Felicity as she got into bed, then her face turned serious again. “Do you think Felix will be ok after we’ve gone? Seeing her again can’t have helped him.” Felix had gone straight upstairs to his room when they arrived back from the visit and had not been seen since.

“Well, we can stay longer if you need to, Mike and Laura would understand.” Anthony said, switching off the light and coming to join her. “Why not see what Felix says.”

“Okay,” agreed Felicity. “Oooooh! Your toes are cold!”

#149: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 7:51 am

That was interesting. Of course both Ellie and Felix were going to be shell shocked enough to retreat into their shells for the evening. Poor Alistair for not realizing that. I wonder what will happen between Alistair and Ellie when Felix and co leave.

However this is the first step, and Felix now has a minimal understanding, as does Felicity. I will be very interested to see how this progresses.

Thanks Liz

#150: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:21 am

Thanks Liz Kiss

brilliant as ever.

#151: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 10:56 am

Still hoping Felicity and Alistair can get them through this.

Thanks, Liz.

#152: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 11:35 am

Felix had insisted that he would be ok and Felicity, Anthony and Emilia should go ahead with their arranged visit to Mike and co. “I’ve got lots to do with work anyway,” he told them, “and I know I can call you if I need to – I’ll be alright.”

Felicity wasn’t convinced, but knew better than to argue, and after reiterating that he could call her whenever he needed to, they left for Switzerland.

#153: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 11:38 am

So Felix wants to try on his own for a bit. I wonder what Alastair might have hidden up his sleeve. He obviously will not be leaving things like that. He's got 3 weeks or so. Poor Alastair, poor Ellie, poor Felix Crying or Very sad

#154: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 12:11 pm

so sad. Am still intrigued by Ellie and Alastair's relationship though..
And I also think Anthony is *rather* lovely...

thanks Liz!

#155: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 12:55 pm

Thank you Liz. Am very intrigued about the whole set up. Hope it all work out well.

#156: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 1:06 pm

Laura entered the bathroom and paused for a moment, her eyes closed. The time was up. She had kept resolutely away from the room for the last two hours and now she would find out.

She took a deep breath, opened her eyes, and looked. Her shoulders drooped as disappointment flooded through her. It was silly to be so upset about it, she told herself. Maybe next month.

How many months had she been telling herself that now?

#157: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 1:14 pm

Oh poor Laura Crying or Very sad

I'd forgotten this. How awful for her.

Thanks Liz

#158: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 1:33 pm

*hugs laura* It must be so hard for her to have this to deal with. *hopes it will happen for her soon*

#159: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 3:48 pm

Poor Laura. Thank you Liz.

#160: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 4:07 pm

Thanks, Liz. I'm glad Felicity is able to see that Ellie is ok and not just using Felix.

#161: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 5:36 pm

Felicity, Anthony and Emilia arrived a few hours later. Laura showed Felicity up to the room she had prepared for them while the men unloaded the baby paraphernalia from the car.

“There’s a cot in here for Emilia” Laura opened a door and showed Felicity a small room off the bedroom. “Will this be alright?”

“Oh, thank you,” exclaimed Felicity, “this will be perfect.” She went back to the bedroom and sank down on the bed. “Would you mind if I lay down for a while? The journey was quite tiring.”

“Of course, go ahead. Would you like me to bring you a cup of tea or anything?”

“No, I’ll be fine – if you wouldn’t mind letting Anthony know I’m resting, and could you keep our luggage downstairs for an hour or so?”

“No problem. We’ll catch up later – I’ll take Emilia down with me so she doesn’t disturb you.” She suited the action to the word, noticing that Felicity was looking rather pale and had dark shadows under her eyes, picked up the baby and left the room, pulling the door softly to behind her.

“Is Felicity alright?” Laura asked Anthony, when all the luggage was in and they were sitting drinking coffee.

“She’s okay. We … well we weren’t going to tell anybody yet, but you’ll probably work it out when she starts raiding the fridge for strange food, we’re expecting another baby.”

“Congratulations,” said Laura, with what she hoped was a genuine smile.

“That’s great news!” exclaimed Mike. “When?”

“Well not for another 6 months.” Anthony told them. “We weren’t really planning on having another child quite so soon after Emilia, but these things don’t seem to go exactly as you plan, and although we’re surprised, we’re delighted.”

“And is Felicity ok?”

“She’s fit as a fiddle. The travelling has tired her more than she expected, but she’s fine. I’ll go up and see how she’s doing in a few minutes.”

Laura rose and collected the coffee cups. “Mike will show you your room – won’t you darling?” She didn’t wait for a response, but headed straight for the kitchen, where she put the tray blindly on the side, then stood at the sink, staring out into the garden, unable to see through the gathering tears.

It wasn’t fair. She was happy for Felicity and Anthony, but jealous of them at the same time. Why was it so easy for some people to get pregnant? Why was it so hard for her? The tears starting overflowing and streamed down her cheeks and she dashed them away, not hearing the kitchen door open and close.

“Hey,” a pair of arms reached round her waist and she was pulled back against Mike’s strong body. “Are you okay?”

She sniffed. “I’m fine,” she lied, “it’s just… well… you know.”

“I know,” Mike’s arms tightened and he rested his cheek against the top of her head. “I know.” Anything further he might have said was lost, as the twins burst into the kitchen. Laura gave a final sniff, then turned to them with a smile to help take off boots and ask questions about the snowman they had built.

#162: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 5:50 pm

Poor Laura. That was the last thing she needed - it would just make her feel inadequate. Please make this come right as well Liz. So many difficult times for so many people *hugs laura*

#163: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 5:58 pm

Aww poor Laura... and Mike too

Thanks Liz

#164: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 6:15 pm

*hugs Mike and Laura*

Good news about another baby though Very Happy

#165: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 7:13 pm

Poor Laura - and her quite natural feelings will make her feel even more guilty that she doesn't feel happy for her sister-in-law.

Thanks Liz.

#166: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 7:15 pm

Poor Laura. I'm glad Mike was able to comfort her.

#167: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Tue Aug 30, 2005 7:31 pm

How sad for Laura - just the news she didn't need. Crying or Very sad

Thanks, Liz.

#168: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:16 am

Oh lovely Mike! But poor Laura. Especially as Felicity seems to have inherited her mother's fertility!

Thanks Liz

#169: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:37 am

A really long update for you as I may not get back online today.

“I was thinking maybe I’m not the best person for you to be seeing.” Felix began as Alistair sat down opposite his desk. “Dr Braun would be willing to see you instead – if you feel that it would be more appropriate?”

“Because of Ellie?” asked Alistair, startling Felix with the direct question and causing guilt to flood through him. This was Ellie’s husband – and a man he respected – he shouldn’t be in love with Alistair’s wife. Shouldn’t, but couldn’t stop loving her anymore than he could stop his heart from beating.

Alistair heard the answer in the silence. “Felix, there’s something I think should know about me and Ellie and about our marriage.”

“Thanks Alistair, but I don’t think I want to hear it.”

“Well, I’m sorry, but I’m going to tell you. You might change your mind.”

Felix looked up and saw the determination in Alistair’s face. He didn’t see it was so important, as far as he could see nothing could make a difference to the facts, and hearing about the woman he loved’s marriage to the man sitting opposite him was not going to be an enjoyable experience. But what could he do. If Alistair felt the need to talk, was it fair to refuse him? He looked up and nodded, and after a fit of coughing and a short pause, Alistair began to speak.

“Ellie and I met in her first term at uni. A friend of mine had a party and I first noticed her when she was looking after one of the girls she’d come with as she threw up in the bath – you know what new students are like at parties, they drink far too much too quickly – a little while later someone came and found her to take her to another friend who was being ill in the garden. I kept noticing her as the night continued – listening to somebody telling her his problems, patching up a couple who’d quarrelled over nothing, collecting up empty cans and bottles and putting them in the bin. There was nothing showy about her, she was quiet and unobtrusive, but whenever she stopped and sat down somebody would gravitate to her, and if they were worried for bothered about something when they sat down, they soon looked more cheerful. It was strange, in some ways she was a misfit, she was drinking moderately, if at all, dressed conservatively, almost faded into the background, but she was quietly integral to those around her.

Of course, I didn’t pick all that up in one evening, but after that first time she seemed to pop up all over the place – her friends were many and varied.

I didn’t really know her well at first – I had my own circle of friends and she by choice stayed quietly in the background, but we’d say ‘hello’ and smile as we passed in a corridor.

Then one night, she’d come out with another girl, who spent half an hour glowering at her ex-boyfriend, then another half an hour draped all over him before they disappeared together, leaving Ellie stranded. So I offered to walk her home – couldn’t have her walking three miles on her own at that time of night.

She argued at first – even at 18 she was fiercely independent and all for equality of women.” Alistair smiled reminiscently, “didn’t see why it wasn’t ok for her to walk home alone, but it was alright for me to walk back alone after she’d got home. It wasn’t the first or last time we had that argument, but as I pointed out, she couldn’t stop me walking where I chose and I could either walk next to her or a few feet behind. Once or twice she picked behind – just to keep me in my place she said!”

Felix gave a small smile. That sounded like the Ellie he knew.

“That first night, we chatted non-stop the whole way back to her digs and both knew we’d found a lasting friend.

After that, we often met for lunch or coffee between lectures and we became really close friends. People often thought we were a couple, but we weren’t. She told me she never wanted romance in her life – she said she’d seen love destroy her parents and she wanted none of it. It suited us both to be thought paired off and to have someone to go to dances and so on with.

We both finished at the same time – she got her degree and I got my doctorate. We were both thinking about what to do next, career wise. She didn’t want to go back to live with her mother. I was applying for a post in the foreign office and it was suggested to me that I might get on better if I had a wife. We talked it over and she agreed to marry me. It provided her with somewhere to live, she didn’t have to take a job she didn’t want to, and it helped me with my career. We were both suited and quite happy with the situation, free to do our own thing, and presenting a united front when required.”

“But she was out here alone – no mention of being married, not using your name and not wearing a ring.” Felix remembered how he had noticed the lack of ring.

“I was working in Bangkok for a while, which wasn’t an ideal place to take her to, so I suggested she took the chance for a few months holiday, instead of coming with me. She liked the idea of getting somewhere quiet and out of the way for a while – my family aren’t aware of the facts of our marriage and my parents were making marked comments about grandchildren. My sister, Pamela, well she never liked Ellie – not that that bothered me, Pamela and I never really got on.

So Ellie said she’d travel around Austria for a bit, find somewhere peaceful to stay for a while, and I headed for Thailand. Until I got ill, then I had to come back. I hadn’t realised until I got here that this was where she was staying, I actually came to see you as I’d heard you were the up and coming man if I had what I was told I have.” He stopped and looked at Felix questioningly.

Felix looked straight back. For the moment he put aside what he’d been hearing and the possible implications. “Yes Alistair, I’m sorry, but the diagnosis was right.” His voice was full of compassion. “You do have Kaposi’s sarcoma, and it is very aggressive.”

Alistair accepted it as calmly as if Felix had looked out of the window and told him it had started to rain. “How long?”

“Weeks. Maybe a couple of months. I am so sorry.”

Alistair shrugged. “Que sera, sera.” I’m not going to spend what little time there is left in regrets.”

“Are you staying out here? We’ll do all we can for you.”

“Make me suffer for longer you mean? No, it wasn’t really for confirmation I came out here – I knew already that I was dying – don’t ask me how. I’ll be grateful for anything to help keep me comfortable, but there’s no point trying to prolong things by another few days, which is really all it would be, isn’t it.”

Felix nodded.

“Ellie’s going to stay with me for the time I’ve got left. I don’t deserve it, but she’s insisting and to be honest, I don’t want to argue.”

She must really love him, thought Felix, despite their original arrangement. He said almost as much “She really loves you, doesn’t she.”

“She’s the best friend anyone could ask for. I adore her. I just wish I hadn’t got her into this whole sorry mess – but then she was so sure she would never fall in love, and it seemed the perfect solution for both of us. And it was of course, until she came here and met you.”

“If I’d known she was married I would have never …”

“Oh I know, you’re a decent guy. If I were going to be around longer, I’d divorce her for you. As it is, I won’t be in your way much longer.”

“But I can’t. I mean you’re still her husband. And you said she loves you and you love her.”

“But as friends, that’s all.” He saw the look of confusion cross Felix’s face. “I thought I’d said that.”

“You said you were when you got married, but people’s feelings change. I can’t believe you’ve been with her all that time and never thought of her differently.”

“Oh goodness, I thought you realised! The reason I needed a wife to help my career, the reason she could agree, knowing I’d never touch her like that. Felix I’m gay.”

For those of you who want more information about it:

Kaposi’s sarcoma was a rare cancer initially found mainly among elderly Jewish or Mediterranean men, affecting the skin, usually on the lower limbs. In the late 1970’s there was an increase in cases of a more aggressive form of the cancer, appearing in younger European and American men and not just affecting the skin but found in the lymph nodes, mouth, gut and the lungs.

The increase in these cases, and the specific group they occurred in was one of the first clues that led to the identification of an illness initially called ‘Gay compromise syndrome’ (among other names) but, which by August 1982 was referred to as Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome.

#170: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 9:04 am

Poor Alistair, and well done those who pitched upon the reasoning. Thanks Liz. *wondering what will happen next*

#171: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 9:09 am

Oh poor Alistair Crying or Very sad

Thanks Liz

#172: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 9:10 am

aha, that does all make perfect sense. Poor alastair. And Felix. And Ellie. And Laura.

One of my cousins has been trying for a baby for 10 years but with no success and has found it very hard to handle both her sisters getting pregnant with comparative ease so Laura's situation is very real to us.

Thanks Liz

#173: Author: aitchemelle, Location: West Sussex

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 9:56 am

Poor Alistair!
Thank you Liz Very Happy

#174: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 10:13 am

Thanks Liz.

#175: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 11:00 am

What a tangled web we weave.... Crying or Very sad

Thanks, Liz.

#176: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 2:41 pm

Thanks, Liz. I'm glad Alistair has explained everything to Felix.

#177: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 7:12 pm

Poor Alistair - and how good of him to confide all that to Felix. Crying or Very sad

#178: Author: Sarah_K, Location: St Albans

Posted: Wed Aug 31, 2005 8:03 pm

Oh..

Poor the lot of them!

I'd guessed he might be gay but not the rest of it. I hope it's quick and painless for Alistair.

#179: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 6:52 am

Felix sat in his office long after he should have gone home, still trying to comprehend all that Alistair had told him.

Ellie hadn’t married Alistair for love.

Their marriage was for appearances only.

Alistair thought Ellie was in love with him, Felix.

Alistair was dying.

And he was still Ellie’s husband.

Why hadn’t she told him?

Didn’t she know she could trust him?

Or had she not thought that much of him after all?

His emotions seesawed between a guilty hope and despair.

#180: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 7:39 am

Poor Felix - what he really needs now is a chance to clear the air with Ellie now. I don't think that Alistair can do much more on his own. Thanks Liz

#181: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 10:42 am

Oh poor Felix, what a nasty situation... *sobs quietly into pile of paperwork on desk*

Thanks Liz

#182: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 11:54 am

Thank you Liz. Poor Felix, poor Ellie and poor Alistair...hopefully now Alistair has spoken to Felix things can improve however!

#183: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 12:52 pm

“And you’re sure you don’t mind babysitting for us?” Felicity asked again. “It doesn’t seem very fair when you’ve come to stay for the weekend.”

“Fliss, Fliss, don’t worry. I am more than happy to sit here with Emilia for a peaceful evening. I invited myself down here for the weekend, I don’t expect you to drop everything you’d planned just for me. You two go out and enjoy yourselves. What are you going to see?”

“A Midsummer Night’s Dream. My friend, Lucy, is Titania. I’m so thrilled to be seeing her again. What with her touring and Emilia I’ve not seen her for a couple of years – and when this one arrives,” she patted her stomach, “I’ll have even less time, so this might be the last time I see her dance before she retires.”

“Well, you go and have a wonderful time. Emilia and I will be just fine.” Juliette smiled as she reassured Felicity, and soon had them hustled out of the door.

#184: Author: Robin, Location: London

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 1:16 pm

oh dear, why does the phrase 'famous last words' come to mind???

*hides in a corner and wibbles*

#185: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 2:15 pm

*hopes Juliette and Emilia really will be just fine!*

Poor Felix, Ellie and Alastair, What a horrible situation for them all. Alastair is such a sweetheart.

Thanks Liz.

#186: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 4:41 pm

Juliette wasn’t very surprised when there was a knock at the door and she opened it to find Kester standing there. He had ‘just dropped in’ at the cottage in Broadwell quite a few times when she had been visiting there, and nobody had commented that it was rather a long way from London for him to just drop in.

“Come on in,” she said with a smile, Emilia balanced against one hip as she held the door. “Felicity and Anthony have gone to the ballet.” she added as he closed the door behind him, although she had a slight suspicion he might already know that. She led the way through to the living room. “Have you eaten?” she asked as he sat down.

“Er… not yet, but I can grab a sandwich or something in a while.”

“I’ve still got to eat myself, so I’ll knock something up for us both in a while – if this young lady ever lets me!”

“She misbehaving?”

“Teeth I think. Her cheeks are very red.”

“Poor little Emilia,” Kester came closer and felt her warm cheeks. “I think you might be right,” he said. “Well, would you like me to take her while you get dinner, or would you like to keep hold of her while I do dinner?”

“I’ll keep hold of her, she might just settle soon if she’s not disturbed.”

“Okay, I’ll go and rustle something up. Anything in particular?”

“I was just planning to do myself scrambled egg or cheese on toast or something like that.” Juliette answered as Emilia claimed her attention again. “But whatever’s easy, I don’t mind.” She lifted the baby against her shoulder and started pacing the room, singing softly to her. Kester paused in the doorway to watch her for a moment, before going to see what was to be found in the kitchen.

#187: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 4:44 pm

Yay two updates!

Kester is obviously very domesticated, obviously Madge turned her attentions to him after the disappointment with Sybil, Josette & Ailie! Laughing

Thanks Liz Very Happy

#188: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 6:45 pm

Awww lovely last update with Kester and Juliette, but poor Felix. Crying or Very sad

#189: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 9:11 pm

Hehe nice to see Kester and Juliette coming along nicely

Thanks Liz Very Happy

#190: Author: Chair, Location: Rochester, Kent, England

Posted: Thu Sep 01, 2005 11:17 pm

Thanks, Liz. It's lovely that Kester came such a way to see Juliette.

#191: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 12:24 am

Juliette tried to close her ears to the sounds of clattering and the occasional exclamation from the kitchen. Emilia was looking at her with her eyes wide open the way that showed she was determined not to go to sleep, but soon would. She continued to sing softly, keeping up her steady pacing, and soon felt the small body slump in her arms as the fight with sleep was lost.

She did a few more turns of the room, just to make sure, then softly made her way up to the nursery and laid the baby down. Emilia did not stir, and Juliette returned downstairs to find Kester emerging from the kitchen with a laden tray.

“Perfect timing,” he smiled as he saw her. “Do you want this in the in the dining room, or do you think Felicity will mind if we slum it in the living room?”

“Fliss won’t mind if we slum it.” Juliette said with a laugh. “Let’s go for the lazy option.” She held the door open for Kester. “Have you got knives and forks and so on?”

“Ooops! I forgot that!” exclaimed Kester. “Would you mind …?”

Juliette gave another laugh and went to find the necessary implements. She returned to find Kester on the sofa, and grabbing a cushion, settled herself on the floor on the opposite side of the coffee table. Kester handed her a plate, and she passed him cutlery in exchange. She lifted the cover off the plate and gave an exclamation of surprise.

“Oh this looks good!” She dug a fork in and lifted it to her mouth. “Tastes good too!”

“You needn’t sound so surprised!”

“Sorry! I hadn’t realised you could cook like this, that’s all. I’m impressed.”

“It’s only omelette.”

“Well, boiled or scrambled is about all I can do with eggs. But this …” she ate another forkful, “this is delicious.”

“It’s really easy. I could teach you if you like?”

“Thanks – that would be good.” she smiled at him and they continued to eat in companionable silence. When they had finished they took their plates out to the kitchen and chatted while Juliette washed up and Kester dried them.

“Is there anything worth watching on TV?” she asked as they sat back down again. A quick investigation brought them the nine o’clock news, which they watched before switching off the set. Juliette reached for some knitting and started to count stitches. Kester waited until she had finished checking the row before speaking.

“What are you knitting?”

“It’s a cardigan for Emilia. It’s nearly done,” she held it up so he could see, “and then I’m going to start on something for the baby.”

There was quiet for a while, not awkward, but the kind of silence when two people are content to be in each other’s company and not feel they have to talk. Kester, ostensibly browsed the newspaper, while actually watching Juliette as she concentrated on her needles. He put down the newspaper and felt in his pocket for the small box he had brought with him.

“Juliette?”

At the sound of her name she looked up and smiled at him.

#192: Author: Lesley, Location: Allhallows, Kent

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 4:27 am

Awww, could it be???

Thanks Liz. Kiss

#193: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 7:17 am

Oooooh, looks interesting this. If we tell you that you have obviously missed a bit will you come back and finish it? Oh well, what happens happens.

Thanks Liz

#194: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 7:50 am

Missed what bit Squirrel? Twisted Evil

A wail came from upstairs, and she was on her feet in a moment. “I’ll be back in a minute.” She hurried off upstairs and returned shortly afterwards with a whimpering Emilia, who despite a clean nappy, feeding, soothing gel on her gums and a teething ring would not settle again and kept them fully occupied until Felicity and Anthony returned.

#195: Author: MaryR, Location: Sale Cheshire

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 8:16 am

Gorgeous updates, Liz.

Thank you.

#196: Author: Squirrel, Location: St-Andrews or Dunfermline

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 8:20 am

Poor Kester. To start and have something like that happen. Oh well, next time lucky!

Thanks Liz!

#197: Author: Mia, Location: London

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 9:41 am

Thanks Liz. Come on Kester, try again! Smile

#198: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Fri Sep 02, 2005 9:42 am

Liz you are quite evil! Well done. Poor Kester!