The CBB :: View topic - The Reincarnation of Rufus

#1: The Reincarnation of Rufus Author: Kat, Location: Swansea

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 6:56 pm

Dedicated to the drunken Gem, confused Catherine and most of all, to poor Rufus!

Gem sat at her computer, quite happy at confusing poor Catherine by her various inarticulate yibblings…

Meanwhile, above her, starring out with big bulging eyes was Rufus the Terrible (Goldfish). He swam round and round his shiny glass bowl, blowing threatening bubbles at Gem whenever she looked up at him.

“Awww, aint you a cutie?” Gem cooed, “Who’s a bubbly ickle fishy then?”

Rufus flared his gills angrily, “bubbly ickle fishy” indeed! Who did she think she was? He was “RUFUS THE MIGHTY, RUFUS THE TERRIBLE, RUFUS THE GREAT, RUFUS THE arghhhh….!” Rufus looked suddenly sheepish, ashamed at being caught off guard by a bubble burp. Hiding behind a handy clump of weed at the bottom of his bowl, Rufus the Bubbly Ickle Fish – “OI!” – oh alright, Rufus the Terrible, started to lay his evil plans…

Gem, in the meantime, had continued to yibble at the defenceless Catherine, who was hastily searching the internet for cheap flights to the most farthest away place which had no internet facilities. Of course, Gem knew nothing of this, otherwise she’d have been yibbling at a much faster rate and much more unintelligibly, both of which were bad enough already.

Rufus however, found Gem’s sudden distraction at being called a nerd by Cath, very helpful. He had begun to nose along a few pebbles to the side of the bowl, slowly building them up until they made a sort of ramp. “Aha! Now I shall have my revenge, my sweet revenge! Taking me away from my poor Nefloongerit. Evil, evil wench!” pausing here, he shook at angry fin in Gem’s direction, before continuing his pebble pushing. His plan, you see, was to escape and find his way back to his beloved Nefloongerit, where they could settle down happily ever after and raise a school of equally TERRIBLE GOLDFISH (mwahahahaa!).

Suddenly there was a loud bang, followed by a string of expletives from Gem. The water in Rufus’s bowl slopped about, making Rufus feel as though he was riding Ripsaw once more. His gills turned a funny green colour (not very fetching for a Goldfish…) and he clenched his lips (do fish have lips? “Yes we do!” Oh alright, keep your fins on), firmly together. He was sharply reminded of his last owner, whom had bought him at Alton Towers and immediately got on the worst ride at the park.

Rufus gave a low moan, as he swirled through the water, quickly remembering a similar sensation as Ripsaw had spun and loopdilooped with dizzying ferocity. As the water began to calm once more, he could see what had caused it. Gem sat at her computer rubbing her head, still swearing at the shelf on which Rufus’s Palace (ahem, who’s writing this drabble? Yes, me! Thank you), on which Rufus’s bowl sat. He gave a twisted little bubble of laughter, enjoying watching Gem make various faces of pain and discomfort. He clapped his fins together in glee, and twirled delightedly in his now calm water. With a shock, and a paling of his once more golden scales, he noticed…

#2: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 7:06 pm

Katkin! You are wonderfully and bizarrely insane!!! *goes back to giggling in the corner*

#3: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 7:09 pm

Owww... Kat, my sides have split from laughing so hard... And Rufus (btw I'm getting another one tomorrow he's being named Bruno Very Happy

) is finding it VERY amusing... ROFL

#4: Author: catherine, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 7:39 pm

*giggles* Kat, this is brilliant! ROFL

And Gem - a companion for him? *confused and despairing*

#5: Author: Kate, Location: Ireland

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 7:58 pm

*giggles* *wonders if Gem's above-avatar words have any relation to this story*

#6: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 8:04 pm

How's the head Gem? If it's anything like mine is today, you have my deepest sympathy!!

#7: Author: Kim, Location: Tipperary, Ireland

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 9:00 pm

sounds like we missed a great night????

#8: Author: Kat, Location: Swansea

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 9:52 pm

Here's some more... Twisted Evil

….His ramp, his beautiful ramp! Destroyed! Gone! Decimated! Annihilated!

“Noooooo!” The large bubble of despair rose to the top of the bowl and popped gently on hitting the surface. Gem looked up, suddenly concerned for her bubbly ickle fishy. Peering intently into the bowl, thereby magnify her face to terrifying proportions, Gem searched anxiously for Rufus. He however, on seeing Gem’s magnified mug (er, face) had promptly hidden behind the weeds again, where he now lay, terrified that Gem was about to eat him.

Aha, but wait! This is Rufus the Terrible we are talking about – surely he isn’t scared of Gem?? What’s this…? A fin is poking out from amongst the green weeds. Checking for danger, he emerges slowly, casting furtive glances about him, he swims little by little further into the unknown, looking for the Great White (aka Gem) of the mighty sea (bowl). Breathing a thankful bubble of relief that Gem was back at her computer, Rufus emerged fully and dropped his best Sir David Attenborough impersonation with a slight grin.

The grin rapidly turned to a scaly frown as he surveyed the wreckage from Gem’s head butting antics. With an angry bubble of remonstrance towards Gem, Rufus set to work on rebuilding his architectural masterpiece (aka his ramp).

#9: Author: catherine, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 10:09 pm

Thanks Kat! *awaiting Gem's reaction*

#10: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sun Nov 21, 2004 10:48 pm

*giggling* This looks fun, Kat. Liz (I used to have a goldfish, but not called Rufus!)

#11: Author: pim, Location: Helmel Hampster

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 12:47 am

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

#12: Author: Ellie, Location: Lincolnshire

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 1:04 am

This is funny Kat, bizarre, but funny. (Am slightly concerned about the well being of Rufus though)

#13: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 9:46 am

:laughing: ROFL

:laughing: Lol Kat, glad you had a good night!! (how I miss MSN Sad

)

#14: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 1:29 pm

*wonders what prescription medication Kat has been abusing......* Wink

#15: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 2:36 pm

*giggles madly* The Great White is very impressed Kat Wink

Oh, by the way, Bruno is now hiding under the bridge in his new tank and sulking because Rufus is getting all the attention... I am, however, mildly worried that Bruno could be "busy"... Confused

#16: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 3:35 pm

*offers to adopt one of the baby brunettes!! Wink

* More please Kitty (love the cat btw)

#17: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 5:32 pm

Gem wrote:

I am, however, mildly worried that Bruno could be "busy"... Confused

Don't worry Gem. They'll eat the eggs if she lays any. *Wondering how to get psychiatric help for 2 confused goldfish who are having an identity crisis by being named for dogs* :dontknow:

#18: Author: Kat, Location: Swansea

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 8:58 pm

More?

Gem however, had other ideas. (Cue another scared look from Rufus the Bubbly Ickle Fishy, OW!… oi, no, you’re not winning this one, you’re staying Bubbly Ickle Fishy, so there!). “Oooh cute ickle fishy wishy, you want your dinsiepoos??” Gem sang out, “ewe looks hungwy!”

At which a most incredibly evil look suddenly spread itself across Rufus’s face, just like scale rot tends to. Frantically pushing pebbles from one side of his bowl to the other, he tried his fishiest to fishnish his ramp. Gem’s hand reached out for the fish food, and, as she was still pissed from the previous night, knocked her hand against the bowl, sending the water slopping again, and destroying once more Rufus’s magnum opus. Fins flayed wildly in anger, bubbles poured forth from his soggy lips, and burst like geysers at the waters surface, sending it into a frothy mess of Jacuzziness.

Gem didn’t notice a thing, and sprinkled some food onto the foam of bubbles, before seating herself once more and immersing herself in a world of confusing yibblings. Above her Rufus plotted happily away, blowing out bubbles of pure joy, as his plan finally came together. “I will EAT her!”

#19: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 10:00 pm

*chokes* *giggles madly and loudly, thus terrifying both Rufus and Bruno*

#20: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 10:04 pm

Funny, he doesn't look evil...

#21: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Mon Nov 22, 2004 10:10 pm

Whatever you're on, Kat, can I have some? *Spluttered coffee on keyboard Shocked

#22: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 9:44 am

The men in the white coats are on their way Kat Wink

#23: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 4:41 pm

*sobs with near hyserical laughter*

#24: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2004 5:37 pm

So glad I am at home this week and can giggle loudly at the screen without causing people to look at me as if I'm mad. ROFL

Liz

#25: Author: Kat, Location: Swansea

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 10:52 pm

Josie wrote:

The men in the white coats are on their way Kat Wink

They arrived safely Jo, stayed for a cuppa and some choccy biccies then for some reason or other set out for your place - they muttered something about red wine? Mean anything to you?Anway, they just loved me and my story and said they could see no problems at all.

#26: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 10:59 pm

Kat wrote:

Josie wrote:

The men in the white coats are on their way Kat Wink

They arrived safely Jo, stayed for a cuppa and some choccy biccies then for some reason or other set out for your place - they muttered something about red wine? Mean anything to you? Anway, they just loved me and my story and said they could see no problems at all.

They never arrived. Honest. No matter what anyone says. *Turns music up another notch to drown out muffled cries coming from the basement room....* Twisted Evil

#27: Author: Kat, Location: Swansea

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 11:00 pm

Oh dear Lord.... JO! LET THEM OUT AT ONCE!!!

#28: Author: Josie, Location: London

Posted: Wed Nov 24, 2004 11:02 pm

Who? :angel: :angel: :angel: :dontknow:

#29: Author: Ally, Location: Jack Maynard's Dressing Room!!

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 10:25 am

Hey, were's the rest of this story!!! I'll have you for dereliction of duty if nothing else!! Wink

#30: Author: Nell, Location: London, England

Posted: Thu Nov 25, 2004 1:44 pm

Wonderful!! Thank you Katkin!!!

#31: Author: Susan, Location: Carlisle

Posted: Fri Nov 26, 2004 11:12 pm

Thanks Kat a very cheering up sort of drabble.

#32: Author: Cath, Location: Coventry

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 3:56 pm

I'm glad I get to meet the famous Rufus at Christmas. *g* Thanks Kat! More soon... please?

#33: Author: Nicci, Location: UK

Posted: Sat Nov 27, 2004 4:35 pm

*g* v funny Kat.*so this is what Gem was on about*

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