The CBB :: View topic - CS in Dee-Dar Land

#1: CS in Dee-Dar Land Author: Emperor Zhark, Location: North East

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 1:37 am

I thought it might be interesting to see what happens if the CS relocated to Sh*ffield.

A cold wind lashed the playing fields at the Chalet School. Joey shivered “ Why did we have to relocate here? To this sh*thole… to… Sh*ffield”. All the girls shuddered in unison, the mere mention of the damned place chilled them all to the core. Chilled them more than the breeze rushing down from the Derbyshire Dales.

“Right, Yer buggers”, said their new PE teacher, Mr Sean Bean. “If yer think this is cold yer right, yer little buggers, T’Oberland ‘n’t’Alps are nothin’ compared to this. Now give me twenty laps yer good fer nowt lasses.”

#2: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 1:42 am

Lol!!! *collapses in fit of giggles* Love it, Emperor Zhark Very Happy

*wanders off giggling and thinking that Zhark will be a promising addition to the CBB, having had a conversation with said Emperor on msn... Twisted Evil

#3: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 1:55 am

Oh good heavens. What can I say? I'm so sorry. Embarassed

#4: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 2:01 am

Don't be sorry Ann, it's funny Smile

#5: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 8:00 am

Well! I said he'd fit in when I saw his profile Confused

Don't worry, Ann! the mad ones are the best Wink

You think Sheffield is cold? Come up to Halifax. It's an overcoat colder up here!

#6: Author: JackieJ, Location: Kingston upon Hull

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 1:28 pm

Points out that Scarborough can get even colder. Mind you, Hell was trying its best this morning. Laughing

at Sean Bean though, Ben has a little thing where he Yorkshire-ises all his lines from LOTR, 'tis very amusing. *Vaguely wondering, do we have enough for a Yorkshire takeover of the board?* JackieJ

#7: Author: Mihiri, Location: surrey england

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 2:11 pm

No need to apologise Ann, this sounds very amusing!!

#8: Author: Elzbie, Location: London

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 2:33 pm

JackieJ wrote:

at Sean Bean though, Ben has a little thing where he Yorkshire-ises all his lines from LOTR, 'tis very amusing. JackieJ

Yes, I've got a friend who does that, ends up sounding like Jonny Vegas though...... It dosn't always rain in Sheff you know Zhark..... and you can always go and hide in the (former) National Centre for Popular Music.... Ela *Originally from Sheffield, and quite fancies Prawn Bean....*

#9: Author: Vikki, Location: Sitting on an iceberg, freezing to death!!!

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 7:42 pm

LOL! Oh dear, oh dear!!! Laughing

#10: Author: Emperor Zhark, Location: North East

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 8:27 pm

“I'm here t'teach you t'fine art of physical education, and, as a bonus, I shall be yer new drama teacher,” said Sean. “Some o'yer may know me frum t'excellent historical drama abart a band o'soldiers frum Sh*ffield, ‘Sharpe’. Or as t'IRA terrorist frum Sh*ffield in ‘Patriot Games’. Ow'bart me role as Boromir, the heir to't'throne o'Sh*ffield in't 'Lord o't'Rings’ -”

“He’s f**king nuts” said Jo.

“I heard that. Any more t'lip off you missy and yer’ll be history, like t'steel industry… Anyway, where was I?… That’s right, I sh'll be teaching you to star in fine films that represent t'culture o'Sh*ffield in many diverse ways, like in ‘Brassed Off’, ‘When Saturday Comes’, ‘T'Full Monty’ and ‘Billy Elliott’ -”

“But Bill-” Joey fell to the floor, blood streaming from her forehead. Bean blew away the smoke from his gun and continued with his lesson. They knew right there and then his love of Sh*ffield was bordering on the psychopathic, no-one would dare question him again.

#11: Author: Helen P, Location: Crewe, Cheshire

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 8:55 pm

This is great! Thankyou Zhark for brightening up my evening! Very Happy

More please, at your earliest convenience....

#12: Author: Carolyn P, Location: Lancaster, England

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 8:57 pm

Ann, you have my deepest sympathy! Mind you, this is fun. Laughing

#13: Author: catherine, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 9:03 pm

*wibbles* Ann, don't apologise!! I've been reliably informed that it's my fault for suggesting he should register!! I think I was drunk on hot chocolate at the time ......... Wink

I'm impressed Mr Emperor Zhark, very brave of you to write a drabble, considering you've not read many!

#14: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Fri Dec 03, 2004 10:59 pm

catherine wrote:

I've been reliably informed that it's my fault for suggesting he should register!! I think I was drunk on hot chocolate at the time ......... Wink

Agreed! Catherine, what were you thinking? Wink

*ducks*

#15: Author: Mihiri, Location: surrey england

Posted: Sat Dec 04, 2004 12:18 pm

This is definitely different!!

#16: Author: catherine, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne

Posted: Sat Dec 04, 2004 8:20 pm

Gem wrote:

catherine wrote:

I've been reliably informed that it's my fault for suggesting he should register!! I think I was drunk on hot chocolate at the time ......... Wink

Agreed! Catherine, what were you thinking? Wink

*ducks*

Yes Gem, ducks are the things that go quack and belong in water! As for what I was thinking - well. we already had you so I figured that if Al joined then the two of you might cancel each other out ... A vain hope I know .... (And you'd better have checked your PMs before you read this and wonder what on earth I'm doing here!!)

#17: Author: Pat, Location: Doncaster

Posted: Sat Dec 04, 2004 9:34 pm

You may have noticed by now that you have to make allowances for folk who come from Barnsley. They are lovely people, but......

#18: Author: LizB, Location: Oxon, England

Posted: Sun Dec 05, 2004 10:06 pm

Emperor Zhark wrote:

“Some o'yer may know me frum t'excellent historical drama abart a band o'soldiers frum Sh*ffield, ‘Sharpe’. Or as t'IRA terrorist frum Sh*ffield in ‘Patriot Games’. Ow'bart me role as Boromir, the heir to't'throne o'Sh*ffield in't 'Lord o't'Rings’ -”

And don't forget Mellors in Lady Chatterly... Wink

Liz

#19: Author: Gem, Location: Saltash/Aberystwyth

Posted: Sun Dec 05, 2004 10:36 pm

catherine wrote:

Gem wrote:

catherine wrote:

I've been reliably informed that it's my fault for suggesting he should register!! I think I was drunk on hot chocolate at the time ......... Wink

Agreed! Catherine, what were you thinking? Wink

*ducks*

It'd take more than Al to cancel me out! However, if we counted you as well... Wink

#20: Author: patmac, Location: Yorkshire England

Posted: Mon Dec 06, 2004 2:51 pm

*Hides behind bullet proof screen and starts a chant* btw anyone else *hearing* the posts in Sean Bean's voice?

#21: Author: Emperor Zhark, Location: North East

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2004 2:33 pm

More of the tale shall follow. Keeping the bunny (or kit) in a cupboard at the moment as haven't had much time to write. Will add to drabble later. Razz

#22: Author: Ann, Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, England

Posted: Tue Dec 07, 2004 6:38 pm

Emperor Zhark wrote:

More of the tale shall follow. Keeping the bunny (or kit) in a cupboard at the moment as haven't had much time to write.

Ah, so that's what the scrabbling noise was. I thought we had mice. Incidentally, I notice that you must have posted while you were at uni. That's addiction, that is!

#23: Author: Emperor Zhark, Location: North East

Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2005 7:58 pm

Hmm, the transfer to St Clare's has inspired a resurrection. If that's the correct term for recommencing a killing spree.

The CBB -> St Clare's House

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